true medical humor?

While acquainting myself with a new elderly patient, I asked, "How long have you been bedridden?" After a look of complete confusion she answered..."Why, not for about twenty years, when my husband was alive."
Dr. Steven Swanson, Corvallis, OR

I was caring for a woman from Kentucky and asked, "So how's your
breakfast this morning?" "It's very good, except for the Kentucky Jelly. I can't seem to get used to the taste," the patient replied. I then asked to see the jelly and the woman produced a foil packet labeled "KY Jelly."
Dr. Leonard Kransdorf, Detroit, MI


A Nurse was on duty in the Emergency Room, when a young woman
with purple hair styled into a punk rocker Mohawk, sporting a variety of
tattoos, and wearing strange clothes entered. It was very quickly determined that the patient had acute appendicitis, so she was scheduled for immediate surgery. When she was completely disrobed on the operating table, the staff noticed that her pubic hair had been dyed green, and above it there was a tattoo that read, "Keep off the grass." Once the surgery was completed, the surgeon wrote a short note on the patient's dressing, which said "Sorry, had to mow the lawn." Have a good day and try to stay out of your Dr's office!!

[mommax3]

That last one is hysterical.

You wouldn't believe the stuff my husband has seen "down there" --- various tattoos and piercings. It is embarrassing enough to get a pelvic exam --- I can't imagine baring all in a tattoo parlor! The patients my husband have seen that have done this are all very proud of themselves and are anxious to talk about what they've had done, why they did it, and, in the case of piercings, the various sensory benefits they feel they enjoy because of them. 8O

Can you imagine how all of this will look 50 years from now on old ladies? To each their own, I guess.

Sally