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For Governement Employees...

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  • For Governement Employees...

    New Element

    A major research institution has recently announced the discovery of the
    heaviest element yet known to science.

    The new element has been named "Governmentium". Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11 assistant
    deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.

    These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons, which are
    surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons.

    Since governmentium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be
    detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes into contact.
    A minute amount of governmentium causes one reaction to take over 4 days to complete when it would normally take less than a second.

    Governmentium has a normal half-life of 2 to years; it does not decay,
    but instead undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the
    assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons exchange places.

    In fact, governmentium's mass will actually increase over time, since
    each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons, forming
    isodopes.

    This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to
    speculate that governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain
    quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as
    "Critical Morass".

    You will know it when you see it.

  • #2


    I love the "isodopes".

    Comment


    • #3
      Re: For Governement Employees...

      Originally posted by jloreine
      New Element
      These 312 particles are held together by forces called morons,
      That was my favorite part.

      So funny, yet so painfully true....

      Jennifer
      Who uses a machete to cut through red tape
      With fingernails that shine like justice
      And a voice that is dark like tinted glass

      Comment


      • #4
        ROTFL!!!!

        This is so true. I am always lamenting the Gov't worker mentality: Change is bad, Change is BAD!!! Working for the Man really does bring you into a whole new realm of thinking.

        Thanks for the chuckle.

        Kelly
        In my dreams I run with the Kenyans.

        Comment

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