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lists for laughs

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  • lists for laughs

    6 FUN FACTS ABOUT CHINESE PRESIDENT HU JINTAO, AS CONVEYED BY AMERICAN CULTURE

    President Hu let the dogs out.

    President Hu lives in a pineapple under the sea.

    President Hu will stop the rain.

    President Hu is afraid of Virginia Woolf.

    President Hu wrote the book of love.

    President Hu is yo' daddy.

    -- mcsweeneys.net



    TOP 6 WAYS PRESIDENT BUSH CAN REGAIN HIS POPULARITY

    Dip into Social Security fund to give every American free HBO

    Use diplomacy to bring peace to Brad, Jen and Angelina

    Replace his "country simpleton" persona with more lovable "hillbilly idiot" image

    Get Saddam to switch to boxers

    Resign

    Jump on Oprah's couch while professing his love for Katie Holmes

    -- "Late Night With David Letterman"



    TOP 6 DIFFERENCES UNDER PRESIDENT MICHAEL JACKSON

    All press conferences are held in the Nose Garden.

    The Lincoln Bedroom becomes the Lincoln Bunk-room

    Instead of the 50 individual states, a series of com-memorative quarters features Michael's old noses.

    No difference whatsoever -- those rich white guys are all alike.

    Even more crotch-grabbing in the Oval Office than during the Clinton administration.

    "Seriously, I did have sexual relations with that woman. I swear. Stop laughing!"

    -- topfive.com
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