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Convict on the loose

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  • Convict on the loose

    A man escapes from a prison where he's been locked up for 15 years.
    He breaks into a house to look for money and guns.
    Inside, he finds a young couple in bed.

    He orders the guy out of bed and ties him to a chair.
    While tying the homeowner's wife to the bed, the convict gets on top of
    her, kisses her neck, then gets up and goes into the bathroom.

    While he is in there, the husband whispers over to his wife:
    "Listen, this guy is an escaped convict.
    Look at his clothes!
    He has probably spent a lot of time in jail and hasn't seen a woman in
    years.
    I saw how he kissed your neck.
    If he wants sex, don't resist, don't complain... do whatever he tells you.
    Satisfy him no matter how much he nauseates you.
    This guy is obviously very dangerous.
    If he gets angry, he could kill us both.
    Be strong, honey I love you!"

    His wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck.
    He was whispering in my ear.
    He told me that he's gay, thinks you're cute, and asked if we had any
    Vaseline.
    I told him it was in the bathroom.
    Be strong honey.....I love you, too."

  • #2






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    • #3
      Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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      • #4

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        • #5
          *dies laughing*

          I needed this forum this evening!

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          • #6
            Too funny!
            Awake is the new sleep!

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            • #7
              :: :thud:

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              • #8
                :thud:
                Cristina
                IM PGY-2

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                • #9
                  Too funny!!!!!
                  Luanne
                  wife, mother, nurse practitioner

                  "You have not converted a man because you have silenced him." (John, Viscount Morely, On Compromise, 1874)

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                  • #10
                    WAHAHAHA!!! DH and I both laughed so hard!!!
                    Gwen
                    Mom to a 12yo boy, 8yo boy, 6yo girl and 3yo boy. Wife to Glaucoma specialist and CE(everything)O of our crazy life!

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