Hi, I'm Sharon

Hi everyone-

I'm Sharon. I'm 27...live in Philly, PA and work as an Internet Content Producer for a mortgage insurance firm. My boyfriend just started med school and well, here I am on this board posting

We've been dating for just about 8 months (it will be in a week) and are committed to make things work. I was reading some other posts and I could have written them...I've been feeling the same things. What surprises me the most about my feelings and situation is that I have a very busy social life (I also work full time although I don't like my job much these days). I tend to have plans most nights of the week whether it be going to the gym, getting dinner w/ a friend/friends, seeing a band I love, etc.

I also have much I'm working on personally such as I'm training to run a 5K race (I just finished my last one this past Sunday), I rececently quit smoking (it's been 3 weeks now), joined an adult field hockey league and I've been in therapy to work on some stress/anxiety/depression issues (for about 9 weeks now). With all of this said, I have lots going on in my life outside of my boyfriend (and have before we started dating), but I'm having a hard time adjusting to his starting school.

He's good about calling me, sending me text messages on my phone just to tell me he loves me, etc., but I still feel left out and sad that I don't get to spend time with him. Then I'll have days when it's really easy and I'm excited to hear about what he's reading and like reassuring him that he'll be great in school, etc. It makes me think that it's all on me to act differently, be the supportive girlfriend, etc. Do any of you feel like this?

Anyhow, I'm already babbling and I'm just trying to introduce myself! I'm happy to "meet" everyone!

Sharon

[DCJenn]

Hi Sharon!

Glad you've found us! (and judging from the title of your position, Kris, our administrator will be glad you've found us as well!)

There are lots of people in your shoes, as you've seen. It seems like every step along this medical education journey has different hoops to jump through. I didn't meet my husband until mid-way through his third year of medical school so I didn't have to learn to adjust to a new way of life.

There are people here who have lived to tell about it though. Jump on in to some of the conversations below! We can get pretty lively at times, but mostly we're all here for each other. (and where else can you vent at 3pm OR 3am!)

Welcome aboard-

Jenn

[houseelf]

Sharon,

Welcome aboard! I can completely empathize with your feelings about how a rich social life, while helpful, can't compensate for time away from the one that you love. It looks like you have found a place where people can understand what you are going through.

BTW, C-O-N-G-R-A-T-U-L-A-T-I-O-N-S on quitting smoking. This is an enormous accomplishment!

Best of luck with all of these transitions.

Kelly

[SueC]

Hi Sharon--congrats on not smoking for 3 weeks! That's awesome!
Seems there are a lot of newcomers in the same boat as you--boyfriends or husbands just started medical school. I personally didn't have that experience, as I started dating my husband during his 3rd year, but I can imagine that would be quite stressful. Anyhow, I'm glad you found your way here!

thanks for the warm welcomes

Thanks for the welcomes...I'm glad I found my way here as well. And thanks for the well wishes on quitting smoking...it's been such a great (although difficult) accomplishment!

I'm happy to meet all of you...to hear about your experiences...and to be part of such an inviting online community.

Sharon

Welcome

Hi Sharon! Welcome to the group! Quitting smoking is a tough thing to do. I smoked for a few years during college...and giving it up was very difficult. At the end of the day though, it was one of the best things that I could do for myself.

Are you going 'cold-turkey- or are you using one of the products available to help you?


Anyway..welcome aboard...I hope you'll keep coming back and let us know how things are going.

Kris

[mommax3]

Hi Sharon,

Nice to meet you! I remember when I was where you are, but it was a while ago -- you CAN get through it, just keep telling yourself that. I look forward to reading your posts.

Sally

[Meenah]

Hi Sharon,
Welcome. I am Luanne. We are almost neighbors, we live in New Jersey. My husband is a Pulmonologist in Princeton, NJ and I am a nurse.
This is a wonderful website. Which medical school is your boyfriend in?
Luanne

Thanks again for all of the warm welcomes! To answer some of your questions:

Kris: I quit cold turkey. I've had a lot of help in other ways though like support from friends, a quit buddy. I started smoking in college and have ever since then...for about 8 years. You're absolutely right though, it is one of the best things to do for myself.

Luanne: I used to work right near Princeton...in Cranbury. This was about 2 years ago...the commute was tough, but it was an awesome area! How do you like it? Frank, my boyfriend, is at Temple. We both went to University of Pennsylvania undergrad (although I didn't know him while at school and I'm older than he is)...so we've both been in Philly for a bit now (he's from the Northeast).

Looking forward to getting to know everyone!

TGIF!
Sharon

[Meenah]

Sharon,
What kind of music do you like? Do you ever go to the TLA?
What a great venue, we say Bob Dylan there about 2 years ago. I'm obviuosly older!!!!!
Luanne

quitting..

Sharon,

A quit buddy...what a great idea! When I quit (before I got married many years ago) I told everyone that I was quitting....including my dh's family. Thomas had taken me with him on his surgical rounds (med school) one night and had introduced me to a patient who was standing out on the balcony smoking. The man had been diagnosed with lung cancer and had just had one lung removed a couple of days prior...and there he was smoking a cigarette on the balcony in the middle of the night. That really hit home! I bought that nicorette gum...it was the only thing on the market at the time...I used it, though I think that it was more of a placebo effect than anything else...but that's ok! Since I had told everyone, I just couldn't face the idea of starting up again....now I have absolutely no desire to go back to that. It's funny, because I only tried it in college because everyone around me was doing it . I really am glad that I quit before it became an 'unbreakeable' habit.

Congratulations for taking this step!!!

You'll have to keep us posted on your progress!

Kris

replies

Kris: I feel an automatic connection with anyone who's quit smoking. It's such a particular thing to go through. I also gain confidence and inspiration from people like you! My dad quit smoking a couple years ago after having smoked more or less his whole life (and definitely for as long as mine)...I draw strength from him too

Luanne: I've seen many shows at the TLA. It's a great venue. The other typical places I go to are Electric Factory, Spectrum and the Troc. I've also seen some shows at NorthStar Bar...smaller place and if you can catch a band there, it's so awesome (usually tend to be not as "big" bands there since it's a small venue).