Aloha!

Hi, I am the girlfriend of a 1st year medical student. It's been a lonely, stressful transition for me & I am grateful to have found some support for "people like me."

I've got a great job & both of our families live in Hawaii, but it's still been tough for me to adjust to his new life as a med student. I've found that all the credit seems to go the the parents and spouses only while us *unmarried partners* are left feeling taken for granted & unappreciated. Although he & I live together & I'm helping to pay for him to get through school, there seems to be no support or credit for "girlfriends."

We've made a concious decision to wait until we get married (even though we've already been together for 5+ years.)....it's better for financial aid....

Anyhow, It will be really nice to have others to talk to about life as the "other half."

Aloha,
Maggie

[DCJenn]

Welcome Maggie!

Life as a spouse or significant other is demanding at times, and more often than not, we aren't given the credit for our 'second' job. (or third as those with children can attest!)

Come on down below and feel free to vent away. We have a very diverse crowd, increasingly more so we are happy to say! Single people, married people, men, women- you name it, we're here.

Again, welcome-

Jenn

[Meenah]

Welcome Maggie,
It will be up & down. Stick around and you will always find someone going throught he same things as you!!
Luanne

Welcome Maggie! I'm the girlfriend of a first year med student in NY. It's so nice to have other people in the same position to talk to. You'll find this site to be so helpful with questions, answers, and people to relate to. I agree that it's difficult to get used to this lifestyle, but with the support of people here, you know that you're not alone. I look forward to getting to know you!
-Sarah

Welcome Maggie!

My bf is a first-year med student also. As you posted, it's a difficult transition. My bf and I have gotten this far through communication, communication and more communication. Once we've done that, we do our best to have our actions follow.

Glad you found us b/c we all need support! Look forwrad to learning more!
Sharon

[houseelf]

Welcome to the crew!

Kelly

[Auspicious]

Welcome, Maggie.

My boyfriend is a first-year as well. He had actually interviewed at the University of Hawaii (almost exactly a year ago, as a matter of fact), so it will be interesting to hear your experiences there, since for us it kind of represents "the road not taken."

It's interesting that you bring up the nuances of spouse vs. girlfriend vs. unmarried partner, because this topic came up between us just recently. My boyfriend and I were talking about our relationship and he said "I feel like 'girlfriend' doesn't really describe what you are to me, but there is no good term for what we are." Apparently I had come up in conversation with one of his classmates and he had referred to me as his "partner" and but soon realized that the person he was talking to assumed that he meant his partner was another man. You gotta love a good misunderstanding.

Anyway, whenever I feel too old to be someone's "girlfriend" I remind myself that I'll hopefully have many decades to enjoy being the spouse or wife, but a relatively short time to be the girlfriend, so I should enjoy it while I can. Of course, we've only been together 2 years, and I might feel differently after 5.

Again, welcome.

Julie