Where to begin...

[Meenah]

Ditto for a free place to stay if you end up in the Princeton area.
Luanne

Ditto for us too -- be it Denver or Portland -- if you find yourselves visiting those cities.
I agree with Kelly -- it is sooo important to visit the cities if you can. Fortunately, I went to Portland both times for interviews (internal medicine, derm) and fell in love with the city. I am very happy to be moving there. I know it is hard to go on all the trips but just do what you can.

[twinsmom]

Thank you for the great travel advice and offers to stay. I will definitely try to make it to all that I can. I work from home so my schedule is pretty flexible, and for the most part, the kids travel really well (cross our fingers!). The biggest worry would be what to do with our dog. Fortunately, we also have incredible neighbors who are great about watching him for us when we go away. Man, all of that travel time with my husband... I will be able to get to know him all over again (after a three year drought :!: What more could I ask for?!

If any of you are needing a place in the Detroit area, we have plenty of room here! (And plenty of entertainment, with 11 month old twins, chasing after a dog, who is chasing after any one who will give him attention and relief from said twins!)

Have a great day!
Jen

Jen,
A little late chiming in on this but I had a few thoughts for you re: choosing a specialty and the S.O. panel for orientation.

First, about specialty choice. This was a tough issue for us. Eric was really torn about applying to internal medicine or ob/gyn. The big concern with ob/gyn was lifestyle after residency. Long story short, I am glad that he chose IM because it introduced him to derm and he is going to do a derm residency now (very family friendly in residency and practice). When we look back on it, we can see why he loved ob/gyn so much. (And it was a hellish rotation -- crabby residents, an attending who actually hit him with an instrument during surgery -- still he loved it!!!). It was a perfect combination for him of seeing patients and building a relationship with them, doing procedures, being in a clinic and hospital setting. Now, derm is a little different but there are a lot of procedures and that is part of what will keep him satisfied. And depending on the patient's condition, he will build an on-going relationship with some patients. So if you both really want to consider other specialties, my advice would be to identify the broad aspects of each specialty he likes and look for similarities in other specialties. It really is hard to balance his career happiness with family time -- both are so important.

Second, the SO orientation. I think it is a great idea and has potential to be done well. Eric's med school had a family orientation. I went thinking I was his family, right? Turns out they meant family as in parents and siblings . So they discussed things like your son/daughter may not be able to have dinner with you every weekend because they have to study so darn much. OK. Not a lot of help for me. The big realization for me was how lonely I felt when he started. My family is in town as are many friends but I was really accustomed to him being available in the evenings to do things, talk, etc. (He had a few years between undergrad and med school). I can't imagine what it would be like to move to a new city. So....resources I think would be helpful:
1. Job search resources -- know any headhunters in the area? They can be very helpful. Maybe HR hotlines for local corporations. Also, the school HR department may have openings too -- give a web address or a sheet of job listings.
2. Local activities with the cost/hours/location. Things like botanic gardens, zoo, museums, tours, walking tours of the city, parks, jogging trails, local theaters, cooking classes, art classes, etc. Things that could be done alone.
3. Local businesses -- gyms, banks, churches and temples, mechanics, hardware stores, garden stores, malls, movie theaters, good daycare options, info on finding in-home daycare (try local United Way), etc.
4. If there are enough families with kids, set up play-groups.

I think that is a great idea and a wonderful to welcome medical significant others!

[twinsmom]

Thank you for the info about both specialty and SO - they were both very helpful. I can understand where you are coming from in feeling alone. We don't even have family here - we moved accross the US for this and got here just one week before he started - it was a very interesting time for me (to say the least)!
Those ideas sound great for the orientation. My husband said he met with the dean with the ideas and she said it sounded great. So now 'we' get to put it all together within the next month 8O . ("we" - meaning he is officially in charge of it, but I will be doing all of the behind-the-scenes organizing of it...) Fun times! (I actually love doing all of the behind the scene stuff, so it will be a good release for me - and a good excuse to get out of my 'homey' comfort zone!).
He also has looked into derm. I got extremely excited when he did (just shy of doing cart-wheels around the house type of excited), but has since kind of died down with his enthusiasm for it . I agree with you that there could very well be some wide-ranging aspects of different specialties that he could find fullfillment in - it's just finding the right nitch.
Take care, and thanks for the input!
Jen