New Here

Well, I'm new here and thought I'd introduce myself. DH is 4th year student who just submitted his ERAS. He's applying for family med. We've been married just over a year. I have to say, the whole ERAS process has me incredibly nervous. I know he'll place somewhere and he's definitely taking my preferences into consideration. I'm terrified we're going to end up placing in Philadelphia though. We've been here for the past three years and I'm ready to move on and go somewhere else. Unfortunately, his mother is putting some not so subtle pressure on us to stay in the area and it's making me feel horrible for wanting to leave. Add that to the pressure of not being real fond of my job and I'm sort of a mess. Anyone have any great advice? Does anyone know anything good or bad about family med. programs in CT?

[houseelf]

Welcome Liz,

We have several members getting ready to go through the match process and possible relocations as well. Hopefully, you will end up where you want to be. Good luck and welcome to our humble web site.

Kelly

Thanks Kelly, I'm really glad I found the website. I've been feeling like there's no one I can talk to other than DH who really understands what's going on. None of his med-school friends are married and everyone at work seems to want me to stay here so I can stay at this job. That's the last thing I want. It's nice to feel wanted at a job but I hate what I'm doing. Sorry my first post had to be whining .

[houseelf]

Liz,

Please, no apologies about whining...this is the place to get real about what you are going through. Besides, no one whines more than me.

Kelly

[SuzySunshine]

Liz,
Welcome to the sight! My husband is also going through the match. He's doing an early match specialty so instead of ERAS he did SFMatch but I know what you're going through. The nice thing about SFMatch is we find out in January but its still nerve racking. We are from Kansas, have been in California for 4 years now and I'm ready to head back to the midwest. I'm afraid we're going to end up here, which isn't a bad thing Stanford is a GREAT program but I'm not a Californian in any sense of the word!

My DH has applied to 20 programs and we have so far had interview offers from 8. His first interview is next week. I'm keeping my fingers crossed, our first choice would be WashU in St. Louis, but Michigan, Mayo or anything more central would be better in my opinion. We have one friend who match family last year but unfortunately she's in Oregon - I can't lend any advice on CT programs, but have you checked the residency reviews?

Welcome and feel free to PM if you'd like and we can lament about match stuff!

Cheri,
Thanks so much for the support. It's good to know that I'm not the only one that's nervous about all this. I'm originally from CT. Mike is from NJ right outside of Philadelphia and we meet while in college in OH. I'd always said that I never wanted to go back to CT but after being away for 3 years I miss it. I really don't feel like I belong in Philly at all. I might be happier outside of the city (right now we're living in the business district) but then we'd have to deal with the expense of commuting etc... since I'd probably still be working in the city too and his first choice is Jefferson (4 blocks from our current apartment). I feel like by matching here we're not getting ahead financially or in any other way. We've already talked about me getting pregnant during his residency and I just don't feel like that would be realistic if we were still dealing with the expense of city living. He's applied to 20 programs (already gotten 12 interview requests) in 8 states. 5 of the programs are in Philly or around the city but I guess in reality there's still a pretty good chance he'll match somewhere else. He did an away rotation at Middlesex in CT and actually really, really liked it. He knows I want to move back and has definitely made that a huge factor in his decision. His mother refuses to even consider the possibility that we might not stay here though. AHHHHHH She's got two other sons and it's not exactly like we'd be moving to the moon.

[SuzySunshine]

Liz,
I think you and I share the same mother-in-law! Although mine doesn't care how far away we are b/c they come visit ALL the time! My husband's interviewing at UPenn, so we'll probably be in Philadelphia at some point, but UPitt is supposed to be the better of the two Pennsylvania programs. I don't know we'll see.

We too are really looking at cost of living b/c we too would like to have kids in a few years and since neurosurgery is a LONG residency he will definitely still be a resident. Can I ask what you do - what is the job market like in Philly?

My biggest fear is that we'll match here - as much I don't want to move to some of his cities like Baltimore or NYC I need out of California!

Welcome again!
Cheri

Cheri,
I'm a paralegal at a rapidly shrinking law firm. To tell you the truth I'm really not sure what the job market around here is like. I got this job straight out of college and it was through a liberal arts job fair. I kind of just fell into the job. We were engaged when I graduated and I knew I needed to be working to support us so I just kind of grabbed the first thing that came along. I've now learned exactly what I don't want to be doing with my life but am no closer what I want to do for a career in the long run. I definitely want to stay home when we have kids which will be in the next two or so years so I'm kind of trying to figure out what to do with myself for those two years. As for my mother-in-law, we've told her over and over again that we'd see her all the time no matter where we are. I see my parents in CT probably once a month or so. Guess she'll just have to deal with whatever happens just like I will.

[SuzySunshine]

Liz,
I know what you mean about not knowing what to do. I'm on my 3rd job since college graduation in '98 and even now with my MBA I don't know what to do. I hope to find something in event planning type stuff when we move and enjoy that for about 3 years, then stay home with the kids!
Good luck with the match!

[fluffhead]

I can't lend any advice on CT programs, but have you checked the residency reviews?

This is probably as good a time as any to remind new users about http://www.scutwork.com, which has some in-depth reviews of residency programs.
Please coax your spouses into posting reviews of their residencies.

[Meenah]

Welcome to the site Liz. I am Luanne, we live in NJ. My husband is a Pulmonologist and I am an RN. This is THE place to whine, and I whine quite a bit!!!
Luanne