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Facebook Forum Migration

Our forums have migrated to Facebook. If you are already an iMSN forum member you will be grandfathered in.

To access the Call Room and Marriage Matters, head to: https://m.facebook.com/groups/400932...eferrer=search

You can find the health and fitness forums here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/133538...eferrer=search

Private parenting discussions are here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/382903...eferrer=search

We look forward to seeing you on Facebook!
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  • #1

    Hello everyone!

    Hi there,

    I am married to an MS4 who will be applying to urology residency in about a month. We live in a city in the northeast, close to both of our families. I work as an engineer. Right now he is spending two months away doing away rotations. It has been harder than I expected, and right now I am really struggling and feeling sad that he missed our wedding anniversary. I know there will be many more holidays and special days he will miss in the years ahead, but this was the first one and it wasn't easy. I am feeling sad and trying to focus on the positive things in my life but it is hard and I can't help but start to feel some resentment.

    I am also nervous about finding out where we will spend the next 5-6 years of our lives on Match Day next year. I like to plan ahead and struggle with the lack of control over our future. Right now I keep reminding myself that the best happiness comes from the pursuit of happiness, which is helping me to stay focused on finding positives in each day.

    Looking forward to learning more about everyone here and having some good conversation. Thanks for reading.
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  • #2
    Welcome! I love this site - it's been such a great resource and source of real friendships for me. I hope you post often so we can get to know you!

    I'm so sorry about your anniversary. We kind of get used to celebrating holidays, birthdays, etc around call schedules, but the first few times are hard. Hugs!
    Laurie
    My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)

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    • #3
      Sounds like you'll fit right in! Match planning is hard, the uncertainty is awful. Hang in there.
      Wife to PGY4 & Mother of 3.

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      • #4
        Welcome!

        Comment

        • #5
          Welcome!
          Wife to Hand Surgeon just out of training, mom to two lovely kittys and little boy, O, born in Sept 08.

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          • #6
            Welcome. Just started my husbands 4th year of Uro residency. And we spent a lot of time (college and early 20s) in the northeast. Let me know if I can help in any way!!
            Married to a Urology Attending! (that is an understated exclamation point)
            Mama to C (Jan 2012), D (Nov 2013), and R (April 2016). Consulting and homeschooling are my day jobs.

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            • #7
              Hi there!

              Sent from my SCH-I535 using Tapatalk

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              • #8
                Welcome! PGY3 urology wife here, although we've been in the south for our whole journey. It's a tough one, but this is a great place for support!

                Sent from my SM-G900P using Tapatalk
                Allison - professor; wife to a urology attending; mom to baby girl E (11/13), baby boy C (2/16), and a spoiled cat; knitter and hoarder of yarn; photographer

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                • #9
                  Welcome!

                  Sent from my SAMSUNG-SGH-I337 using Tapatalk
                  Student and Mom to an Oct 2013 boy
                  Wife to Anesthesia Critical Care attending

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                  • #10
                    Welcome!

                    Match was rough for me being a planner and control freak! I was a mess fourth year!

                    Nice to "meet" you!


                    Wife of a PGY-6
                    Loving wife of neurosurgeon

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                    • #11
                      Hello! 😊


                      Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
                      Wife to Family Medicine attending, Mom to DS1 and DS2
                      Professional Relocation Specialist &
                      "The Official IMSN Enabler"

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                      • #12
                        Welcome. You've come to the right place.
                        Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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                        • #13
                          Welcome!
                          Veronica
                          Mother of two ballerinas and one wild boy

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                          • #14
                            Originally posted by harvestmoon View Post
                            Hi there,

                            I am married to an MS4 who will be applying to urology residency in about a month. We live in a city in the northeast, close to both of our families. I work as an engineer. Right now he is spending two months away doing away rotations. It has been harder than I expected, and right now I am really struggling and feeling sad that he missed our wedding anniversary. I know there will be many more holidays and special days he will miss in the years ahead, but this was the first one and it wasn't easy. I am feeling sad and trying to focus on the positive things in my life but it is hard and I can't help but start to feel some resentment.

                            I am also nervous about finding out where we will spend the next 5-6 years of our lives on Match Day next year. I like to plan ahead and struggle with the lack of control over our future. Right now I keep reminding myself that the best happiness comes from the pursuit of happiness, which is helping me to stay focused on finding positives in each day.

                            Looking forward to learning more about everyone here and having some good conversation. Thanks for reading.
                            Welcome!! I am right there with you, minus the uro match. But the months that are dragging by until March are going to be tough. And I TOTALLY understand the struggle of wanting to stay near family. We moved three hours away for med school and I desperately (like DESPERATELY) want to move back home. The lack of control is so, so tough. I was talking to my husband over dinner the other night about how frustrating it is to know that my resume will have chunks of 3ish years for employment because of having to move multiple times for *his* dream. I can't plan ahead into the further further than three years because who knows where we'll end up after residency - and we don't even know where residency will be yet! And it sucks. The resentment is hard, too, but not a soul on this board will tell you they were immune to it. It's impossible not to be, when you consider the circumstances and all that you're sacrificing for their careers. You just have to learn to work through it (and trust me, I'm still learning!)

                            Stick around - this board is completely amazing.
                            Wife, support system, and partner-in-crime to PGY-3 (IM) and spoiler of our 11 y/o yellow lab

                            sigpic

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                            • #15
                              Welcome and glad you found us! It's exciting to have another msIV spouse on here

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