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About to begin this journey

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  • About to begin this journey

    Hi, there! My boyfriend of 4 years is about to begin his first year of med school. I know it will be a bumpy road, and I've heard horror stories already, so I sought out a support group, and am thrilled to find out one even exists! Our situation may be a little different than most:
    We will be living about 2 hours apart. I own a petsitting business in my hometown and don't want to give it up just so that I can live with him, be a distraction, and (from what I hear) be somewhat ignored and lonely while he's in school the first two years. While we were both in school, we were about the same distance from each other and, actually, have only been in the same town consistantly for the last year.
    Anyway, I'm glad to be here, AND I was reading a post asking for dog training advice -- I may be able to help with that. I work with animals daily, so feel free to ask if you have any specific animal related questions!

    Thanks,
    Keiva

  • #2
    Hi and welcome. I left my job as a vet assistant/on-the-job-trained (ie unlicensed and underskilled) tech to follow my then-boyfriend of 4-ish or 5-ish years to med school across the country. I now work as a secretary, and though it pays better it's not as fun nor as rewarding.

    Best wishes for you and your boyfriend. Don't believe all the horror stories you hear. A lot of growth can happen in a relationship during med school.
    Alison

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    • #3
      Welcome! You are smart to hold onto what you love (your business) while he goes after his dream!

      Read the archives when you have time and ask questions whenever! I'm sure we can all learn from you too!
      Flynn

      Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

      “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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      • #4
        Welcome, Keiva!!

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        • #5
          Hi Keiva! I just found this site recently too. My husband is now an M3 and the first year definitely takes some getting used to...actually, all of them do I think I'm the one that needs the dog training advice I have a one year old great dane that goes CRAZY whenever anyone knocks on the door or comes inside. Do you have any advice on what I can do? Sorry to throw a question at you immediately but everything I've tried so far hasn't worked

          Stella

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Stella
            I have a one year old great dane that goes CRAZY whenever anyone knocks on the door or comes inside. Do you have any advice on what I can do?
            Stella -- that's a tough one! The only thing I can think of is maybe try to work with your dog and knocking on the door -- maybe tell the dog to sit at the same time as knocking on the door, then reward with a treat. Try to get to where the sound of the doorbell or knocking is the cue to sit and wait for the treat. If you could get your dog to understand that when there is a noise at the door it will be rewarded for sitting quietly, maybe that would solve the problem. If it is the excitement of a new person, I really don't know what you could do besides lots of socialization -- maybe walks in dog parks if there are any where you live or just in high traffic (people) areas. Good luck!

            Keiva

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            • #7
              Welcome, Keiva!

              Flynn's right ~ it's great that you're continuing your business. You'll be glad you did.

              I'm glad you found this site too. It's great to have a place where everyone understands exactly what you're going through.

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              • #8
                Keiva, that's a great tip: teach an incompatible behavior. If she's sitting for treats she's not careening around the house goosing people and having a bark-fest.

                I like an alarm bark, though -- hubby doesn't, but he's never been a woman alone in the house when a weirdo's peeping in the window or a creepy solicitor is being persistent. I find that if, instead of scolding Sam or trying to channel her energy into a Sit, I simply *thank her* sincerely, and use a happy tone of voice to let her know I am friends with whomever's coming in ("That's right, it's Daddy!" or "Do you think it's David coming over? Won't that be fun?") I look like a freak show but she calms down and looks to me for further instruction.

                Stella, you can also check out Ian Dunbar's books. How to Teach a New Dog Old Tricks has instructions for throwing a "puppy party", the most intense in-house socialization a pooch can get. By the time people (with treats, giving attention and yummies only for a polite sitting pup) have paraded through your house, come in and out a few times, wearing funny hats occasionally, your pooch will be the envy of the neighborhood for his/her manners.
                Alison

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                • #9
                  Thanks for the advice Keiva and Alison . I am going to try all of your recommendations as soon as possible!

                  Stella

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                  • #10
                    welcome!!

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                    • #11
                      Me TOO!!!!

                      I'm also new to the site, and my bf of three years will be starting first year as well. It would be nice to have a buddy going through the same thing at the same time, so I hope you'll feel free to message me! Luckily for me, I'm defending my thesis next month, so I'm going to move to the same city (and I already got a job! Yay for me!). I think you're right though, I'm not going to see much of him anyway, so I'll just have to dive into my work. 8O
                      Unfortunately, all of the people I know in med school have spouses in med school, so they study together. This is the first place I've found tips on how to deal with things.
                      I guess my first step after the move is going to be to join a knitting club and a book club!
                      Good luck Keiva!

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                      • #12
                        Welcome! Enjoy the board, it has been a great place for support for me.
                        Mom to three wild women.

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                        • #13
                          Welcome!
                          Cranky Wife to a Peds EM in private practice. Mom to 5 girls - 1 in Heaven and 4 running around in princess shoes.

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