Hello Everyone:):):):)

Hello everyone! My name is Rachel. I am 24 and currently engaged to a third year medical student. I have known about this board for quiet some time, but it seems that I am always having some difficulty with logging in, lol. Anyway, today I have decided to attempt my first post. My fiancee and I have been together for about two years and plan to marry next year sometime. We just relocated to a new town where he plans to complete the last two years of medical school. I spent most of last year as a homemaker, though we have no children yet. After practically loosing my mind due to being lonely, I have learned my lesson, lol. I am starting school in just under two weeks now! I have finally come to accept that his being in medical school means our having very little time togethor, lol. I figure that now is the optimum time for me to get my education! I was wondering if I might ask some of you for your opinions? As I stated before, we plan to marry next year, after he graduates. We would both like to start trying for children right away. Well, I know that resident's make very little money.......but I have always wanted to stay at home with our children. Is it possible to be a stay at home mother and makes ends meet when your spouse is a resident? I know that it will be difficult, but neither of us want to wait to have children until he completes residency. I guess I am just hoping to hear some of your experiences regarding this topic and possibly get some tips on how to make it work. Thank you for any advice you can offer! I am so relieved to have a place like this to visit and converse with other's in my same situation.

Welcome Rachel! It's great to have you on board here - this is a wonderful and diverse group! My name is Claudia and my husband is in his 4th year of a general surgery residency. I just finished graduate school and am looking for a fulfilling job! I applaud your motivation to find your own niche while your husband finishes school! I think it's sooooooo important for you to have something that brings you joy and satisfaction while our husbands are in school, residency, etc - because unfortunately, they are really, really, really busy! Look forward to chatting with you below! Oh and by the way, several women here have managed to stay at home with their kids while their husbands are in residency!

[houseelf]

Rachel,



Welcome to the boards. What specialty is your fiancee thinking about? The specialty that he chooses and the residency programs that he considers will have a profound impact on how "doable" it will be to have kids and stay at home during residency. Of course, anything is doable, it just may be more challenging!



To answer your question, many spouses stay at home with the children during the training years. Some supplement the family income by watching other children or home businesses. This choice just takes a commitment by the entire family to make it work. I'm sure that you will meet several wonderful individuals here who can give you some great advice on this issue.



I look forward to meeting you below. Good luck with the wedding plans!

Kelly

[Meenah]

Welcome,

This a great place with a very diverse group of spouses, you will get all kinds of great advice on just about any topic My name is Luanne, my husband has been out of training for 15 years. We have 4 children between us, two in college and two in high school. I work part time as a nurse. The medical world is a unique challenge, but worth it. Good luck.

Luanne

[SueC]

Hi Rachel,

Welcome to the boards!

In answer to your question, it is absolutely possible to be a stay at home mom while your husband is a resident. Although they don't make a lot of $$, many families who survive on that income, regardless of the profession of the husband. I have stayed home with our kids from day one (our oldest is 2.5) but if I could do it over again, I would do things a little differently. I'd still stay home, but I never would have let us get used to a double income. We bought a house and set up our lifestyle to need two incomes, so I have had to work out of the home in order for us to make ends meet. I have gradually whittled our expenses down so that I don't have to pull in nearly what I used to. My advice to you is if you do seek employment before you have kids, put all of your income into savings, so that your daily expenses will never exceed what your husband makes. That way when you have kids, you will easily be able to make it on one income and you will have a nice little "nest egg" to fall back on if your car breaks down or some other mishap occurs.

[DCJenn]

Hi Rachel-



Welcome to to the boards. There are a lot of people here who are stay at home moms, there are some who are not and there are people with no children. So, there's always a lot to talk about- and people to talk to- no matter where you are in this process of doctorspousedom!



I am a spouse to a 3rd year Army pediatric resident. I am the director for a facility that serves people with developmental disabilities in Group Homes here in San Antonio. We have another 9 months here and then it's off to another adventure.



Welcome aboard!



Jenn

Thank you Claudia, Kelly, Luanne, SueC, and Jenn for the warm welcome! It is nice to meet all of you. And I appreciate your responses to my question as well. It is so nice to have a place to meet other medical spouses. I think I am really going to enjoy this message board. I am still having some difficulties logging in......I think it has something to do with cookies. I asked my fiancee if he knew how to fix the problem......turns out he is just as computer illiterate in this area as I am, lol. Anyway, I hope to be able to fix this problem by this weekend. Perhaps that is a little wishful thinking on my part, lol. I look forward to chatting with you all on the boards below soon. Take care and enjoy your week.

I'm late chiming in....Welcome!



Feel free to email me about your login problem. There are a couple of people who've had to sign up all over again because of problems, so you're not alone.



Hopefully, that will be cleared up shortly...but I'll surprise everyone with this one when its all ready



I look forward to getting to know you!



Kris