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Are mobile devices changing how we socialize?

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  • #16
    I text all the time, mostly with local friends who are running kids all the time just like I am. I handle 95% of my personal email through my iphone, both reading and responding, and 100% of my work email (outside of work hours) is handled trhough my iphone. My reading/posting here and on Facebook is almost totally via my iphone. I do still have phone conversations when I am driving. I have noticed that my boys, the oldest especially, would much rather text than talk, but when he loses texting for disciplinary reasons, he will pick up the phone to talk to his gf.

    I think it has changed things, not all for the good, but I also think there is no going back, so we are all going to have to figure out how to make it work.
    Wife of an OB/Gyn, mom to three boys, middle school choir teacher.

    "I don't know when Dad will be home."

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    • #17
      Originally posted by HouseofWool View Post
      This is something I really struggle with. Being a single parent of 2 young kids means that my opportunities to get out and meet people are so limited as to be painful. (In the spirit of full disclosure - I know I struggle with loneliness - really struggle, which seems odd when I live with 5 other people.) Unfortunately, that means that my main social contacts are on-line. Sad, but true.

      I do text, but it tends to be more limited in nature. I cannot have a full "conversation" when I am limited to 160 characters. I do use my phone sending quick pics to family and friends.

      I miss the way that people used to interact. I think that having your neighbors in your business made sure that you kept you business clean and you were less likely to be diddling the babysitter. I don't think we need to completely shun current technology, but I do think face-to-face interactions are crucial.
      This. I text short messages to people I would rather not speak with, like my SIL and my dad. i also send short messages to DH to let him know I am thinking about him, etc. I use my iphone for email messages that contain important information I need when I am out. I am disorganized and forgetful. I also use the map app because I get lost a lot. I use FB and internet when I am waiting to pick up my kids places or at a stoplight. Mostly, my kids steal it for games. We don't have an ipad. Oh yeah, I also use my iphone for music when I am working out.
      Needs

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      • #18
        I consider myself one of the few people among my friends who still really enjoys live conversation ie in person. I hate the phone and can only talk on the phone for extended periods of time with my brother. I hate texting and feel like I'm wasting valuable time emailing long messages. I think that's part of the reason why I've been here for 5+ years and have less than 2000 posts. I have responses to a lot of things on here but have such a hard time typing it out. It makes me sad when I see my young sister (senior in hs) spend more time on her phone texting then having a live conversation with the people around her.
        Danielle
        Wife of a sexy Radiologist and mom to TWO adorable little boys!

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        • #19
          I should add that I hate that sometimes dh and I are finally alone without the kids and we don't even realize that we are both on our phones playing a game or looking at facebook....technology is great and horrible at the same time.
          Danielle
          Wife of a sexy Radiologist and mom to TWO adorable little boys!

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          • #20
            I agree with Michele - this is the new "real world", and embracing it really helps me have more fulfilling relationships. DH is in the OR all day, so we can't have a verbal conversation, but he gets a minute here and there to send texts, and I text him pictures of DS throughout the day. I also send those to my parents and my in-laws, who live out of town. They get to see their grandson's daily activities rather than just see him one day every month or so when we have a chance to visit.

            And I see Facebook the same way. When I talk to my friends, we have things to discuss because we've interacted in that small way. So, when I see a friend after a few months, the conversation is much more interesting than just trying to think of things that we talked about the last time. I was hugely relieved when my mom finally created an account. My aunts and random relatives were telling her stuff about DS that I'd posted and forgotten to tell her (we talk about once a week - it happens, but not intentionally). I think she'd get hurt that they knew more than she did.

            I remember back in high school. I was the queen of letter writing. I wrote pretty much everybody at summer camp, as well as friends in my hometown while I was at camp. I found an absurd amount of letters when I cleaned out my room at my parents' house. We didn't have Internet yet, so that's how I kept up. Then one summer, suddenly we all had email and Internet, and we started emailing. We could write every couple days instead of weeks. Then we gradually got MySpaces, and then Facebooks. These are people that I've known for over a decade, but probably haven't seen in almost as long. I love that they're still in my life, even though according to the old rules, we'd have moved on years ago.
            Last edited by ladymoreta; 04-23-2011, 08:43 AM.
            Laurie
            My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)

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            • #21
              I used to hate texting. I became addicted when my office went through areally difficult time where four people left within a month (including me). It became a method of keeping our sanity after losing some of the people with whom we were close and that provided moral support. For the people with whom i am close (my parents, my fiancé, my best friend), I still use the phone (and much prefer it to texting), but texting has enabled me to stay in touch with people I know I wouldn't otherwise...

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              • #22
                I talk on the phone w/ my mother and my brother- and that's it. My husband has really crappy cell phone service in his basement apartment so we tend to ichat or IM through Facebook. We met online and a vast amount of time was spent communicating via IM. That, and he is awful on the phone. My neighborhood uses FB to communicate about what is going on (one neighbor has a husband who so undergoing cancer treatment and it's easier for her to send out one message and then we can all coordinate meals and child-watching, for example). We're trying to get the PTA members all online and have found that not everyone has a computer but nearly everyone has a smart phone. It has helped meeting attendance to send e-blasts right before the meetings. My office communicates via text for urgent stuff (i.e.- do you want me to go to this meeting?) but email everything else.

                My friend from 3rd grade and my former college room-mate and I talk but always via cell phone- waiting for kids appointments, sitting in traffic, walking the dogs, it's a lot easier to keep in touch.

                I still send letters and Christmas cards.

                Jenn

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                • #23
                  I think when dd was a newborn was when I started texting more and more. It was easier to keep in touch and let people know that I was ok in a brief message than an email or over the phone.
                  Dh and I text if we need to tell/ask each other something while he is at work if he has reception.
                  married to an anesthesia attending

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                  • #24
                    I cut my messages and posts way shorter on my phone or iPad. I am just not good at typing on them, and I am not as long and thoughtful with my replies. I prefer the telephone for the most part. It feels more personal, like I can convey the feeling better, but I often feel that when I call I am bugging people, and they would rather not chat. I feel awkward.

                    There's one person I call who never picks up the phone. She prefers to text, and I think she purposefully doesn't answer sometimes just so she can smile while I make an ass of myself on voicemail. For those of you that haven't had the pleasure of listening to one of my voicemails, they are a hot mess. A real comedy treat. Love you, Syl!
                    Heidi, PA-S1 - wife to an orthopaedic surgeon, mom to Ryan, 17, and Alexia, 11.


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                    • #25
                      While I agree with Michele that today's daily use of technology is the new real world, so to speak, I also feel that hiding behind typing has affected how I interact with others. But I do think that our kids won't have that problem, as they won't know any other reality. On one hand, I like that through email/texting/FB I can keep in touch with friends and family that are in other states or countries, on the other hand, because I can still connect to them so readily, I haven't made more of an effort to make friends here that I can actually see in person and touch. Again, I'm not sure if it is a true problem or a problem because my generation was raised to think it is a problem. I don't necessarily think texting is an evil in itself, similarly to alcohol, it's all in how it's being used vs abused.

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