Healing from the election

[PrincessFiona]

I'll start. I have great respect for all of you. Your experiences and political views. I'm thankful to live in a country where we can have opinions... disagree... and still be friends.

Hugs to everyone who felt hurt this cycle. It was ugly.

Kris

[SoonerTexan]

2 things actually give me a little hope:

1. The civil discussion we managed to have today about a very controversial topic

2. I (nicely) pointed out to crazy programming professor that he was being a little biased and a little aggressive and he APOLOGIZED (genuinely) and gave himself a Facebook time out (that I think will last all of 24 hours). FLOORED.

[moonlight]

I honestly never take any of it personally. Mad respect for all of you. I think that has something to do with being in the minority politically until I moved here 3 yrs ago. It's so strange to have friends IRL that agree with me politically! haha!

[diggitydot]

I honestly never take any of it personally. Mad respect for all of you. I think that has something to do with being in the minority politically until I moved here 3 yrs ago. It's so strange to have friends IRL that agree with me politically! haha!

Same experience here.

[GrayMatterWife]

What do you mean, hurt?

I am sorry if I suggested I was hurt. I didn't mean to. I don't get my feelings hurt by people who decide that they are going to be small. The President ran an incredibly small and small-minded campaign. He didn't still hope--he engendered fear. I am not hurt by that; I am deeply unimpressed. Why shouldn't I be? According to the President, I am the enemy. I deserve to have less. I deserve to be the object of voters' "revenge," as he put it. I am not hurt; I am pissed.

[corn poffi]

Well let's see here. I've had my intelligence insulted by and acquaintance IRL because of my views. That person is just full of hate anyway. So at least now I have an excuse not to ever see him again. At least I didn't stereotype an entire voting population based on his reaction.

I'm mostly pissed about the negativity coming from both sides. I'm sick of the "I voted for X, so Y is wrong". Or even worse the, "I support X and one person who supports Y was mean to be once, so I'm going to generalize that to all Y supporters. What happened to civility? Y shouldn't have been a douche in the first place, and X should know that generalizations are ridiculous. But, no matter who won the election, the bitching and belittling would continue.

Politics are such a matter of opinion, and being able to publicly express your beliefs is a beautiful thing about this country. It's just sad that expressing beliefs during elections is negative campaigning, lying, and insulting everybody who doesn't believe with you.

[PrincessFiona]

Abigail. Deep breath friend. This was directed at the many people who have expressed bitter disappointment and hurt over this cycle... not one person. It is also for me

Corn poffi. We are all feeling it.

This is a thread of healing.

[GrayMatterWife]

I assume you did not mean the deep breath recommendation to be condescending. I was just responding to the thread about being hurt--I didn't assume it was just about me. But given my activity on the debates thread, I wanted it to be clear about me, personally. I am not hurt. I am extremely angry and unimpressed. There is an important difference. I am not hurt about being called a racist. I am angry. I am not hurt by being called the enemy. I am angry. I am not hurt anout being snottily dismissed as someone who clings to guns and the bible. I am angry. I am not hurt by being told that I owe to the government even more, because the government has decided to take away more freedom. I am angry. I am not hurt by the suggestion that I am un-American because I don't see myself as "belonging to the government." I am incredibly pissed.

[PrincessFiona]

Condescending? Of course not!

Abigail, your anger comes through so loud and clear that it is hard to respond. I feel that anything I say might be misinterpreted. Also... your anger about this feels kind of pointed at us. I dont think you intend this based on the years I have known you.

Your views are accepted and respected here. Please know that.

Also, many of us were put down, insulted, and hurt this cycle. Politics has become terribly divisive.

Here... in this space...let's figure out how to let some of that go.

Non-condescending hugs

Kris

[GrayMatterWife]

There is no reason to think it is pointed at you. All my comments have been pointed directly at President Obama. My anger has nothing to do with iMSN. No one here that I can remember this season has conducted themselves in a nasty way when it comes to politics. I don't respect the reasoning that leads someone to vote to Obama, but that does not mean I am angry at that person. I assume that no one is angry at me for voting for Romney, just because they don't respect or agree with the reasoning that lead me to that.

Honestly, this is why I basically have said nothing about politics around here for a while. I assumed that sharing how I really feel would be misconstrued or taken personally or just makes people feel sad or uncomfortable. So I said nothing.

Re: "letting it go": my anger is not a psychological struggle or something I feel need to "work through." I am not interested in letting my anger go. It is righteous, justified and motivating. I am not interested in trying to feel better about what my President thinks of me. Don't get me wrong: it doesn't dominate my life and dictate my day. He's just another blowhard prick politician. But I am not going to pretend that I am OK with him and I want to stay motivated to resist his efforts to make my life less.

[HouseofWool]

I am such a child! When GMW and Pollyanna start using profanities (even mild ones) it makes me giggle!

[PrincessFiona]

To me, it comes down to choices. I really believe that people's choices are a function of their life experiences. It's just my opinion, but I think that's one of the reasons that politics is so personal. We all have different histories ... life experiences ... and beliefs. This helps form our political ideology. I don't know Abigail, I think that's what makes it easier for me to listen to, respect and understand an opposing view even if I don't agree with it. They have lived a different life than I have and that's why their choices are different.

The word respect is also pretty powerful. When someone says that they don't respect anyone who disagrees with them, it's pretty alienating. None of us like to be shut down like that. I know many of us on either side of the aisle felt that this time around. I just feel like I don't have to agree or understand, but I have to respect where someone else came from and what there life was like that brought them to the place that they are. How else can we reach across the aisle? If we start out by telling the other team that we don't respect how they voted for the opposition, we can't move forward and change anything.

I personally agree with many of your political views ... for slightly different reasons though ...

At the end of the day though, I do feel like we have to be able to talk to each other and understand each other. Our anger is not serving our purpose.

Kris

[niener]

This is the part where we light candles, sit holding hands in a circle and sing kumbayah, right?

Honestly, this place -- iMSN -- has been my healing place during this election. In real life and on facebook I'm completely inundated with hateful, insensitive remarks from all sides, gross misrepresentations, unfair assumptions, and so much more. The fear mongering is completely out of control and incites a mob mentality that if "my" candidate (whoever that is) doesn't win it will be the start of the freakin zombie apocalypse. So thank you, all of you, for making this a place to reasonably discuss political matters without shrouding them in bigotry.

And GMW, I especially want to thank you because the truth of the matter is the overwhelming majority of the Republican opinions I hear in real life are the ones that give the GOP a bad name -- the ones that equate the Republican party to God's party and vote against Obama rather than for Romney (or any R candidate) because he's black, Muslim, and not a US citizen . I really get so much out of your posts that I have a hard time getting elsewhere. Of course it helps that you're a lawyer and can state your case so eloquently

I hope that came across as sincere as I intended it to.

[Pollyanna]

LOL, HoW. Only the women in our family swear. My mom talks about how the hired man on the farm taught her while they milked the cows Our men are far too classy and respectful of the women around them .
Folks, you do realize that the political discussions of today are no different than those of 60 years ago. People were divided then too. Families fought just like today. Ask your parents and grandparents about it. The only difference is social media and the 24 hour news cycle. And I would encourage women to stop being "hurt". Sure you may be called names (as I have been) but don't waste time being hurt because someone cannot express their opinion in an intelligent way.

[PrincessFiona]

I don't know Tara ... I protect my right to feel hurt. LOL. I had a friendship really turn sour over my lack of support for the healthcare reform as it is. It's my opinion based on my own life experiences living in the UK and being married to a physician. I don't feel angry about her opinion. I'm just sad about the way that she expressed herself. Some of the things that she said were pretty hurtful to me. I'm trying to just understand her perspective so I can let go of that ick in the pit of my stomach. It wasn't about her not expressing herself in an intelligent way ... it was really the veracity of the opinion and distaste for mine.