Paula Deen.. What do you think about her? I always loved her show.. :(

[PrincessFiona]

I don't condone her behavior, but think the punishment is over the top. She has basically lost every sponsor, her cooking show, and her book publisher stepped back .... Before the case went to trial.

Like I said, I don't condone the use of the n word...I do think with PD there is some cultural/social context to consider. I also think its ridiculous that the n word is used in every rap song by African Americans...and that it is bantered about playfully between some, but that that's ok. I understand white privilege, but still find if the word isn't okay, it shouldn't be said at all.

ETA: (now that I'm not on my phone) Full disclosure .... I heard what sounded like the n word coming from the back of the van this week and flipped out and pulled over to the side of the road while we were on the highway. I had two very shocked teenagers who were laughing over an actual song called nigga nigga which I find very tasteless and disgusting. It is mainstream music though. Mainstream rap. I do not approve, I told them that this makes them trash and that I am ashamed of them and the people they are. "Mom, it's a song," my 14 year old, otherwise very good kid said. "We are in our van. We are not talking about black people. It's just a song." No, it's not just a song...not to me....but it pisses me off that there is this song out there, put out by back rappers who would definitely be offended to hear my kids use the word in our van. Teenagers aren't generally able to understand about white privilege and oppression the way that we do. Damn, it makes me mad that this song is out there, that my kids heard it and that they repeated it.

Kris

I am ashamed to even tell the story.

[Cinderella]

Kris I appreciate you telling the story because I struggle with the same duplicity. They can use it in music and among each other but nobody else can because that's racist, and don't call them black even though it's a descriptive fact because it's politically incorrect and offensive to some. I'm offended myself by the use of the N word whether it comes from Paula Dean or is used in popular culture through music, movies and television, because that's the way I was brought up and taught to think. So when it is used these days among themselves it really puzzles me.

Approaching my friends on the issue is a sensitive topic unless they first make it known their own feelings on the subject matter. Some are ok with it while others are not. As far as my understanding it's alright to use the term black or African american. I've been in discussions about this before with members on here in the debate section and I'm afraid I've been responsible for harming someone's feelings when it wasn't may intention. I hope I didn't drive them off here from participation by expressing my ideas and experiences on the subject matter and if I did I apologize. It's a sensitive topic to be sure.

I also should add that in some parts of this country and not just in the South people that are Paula Dean's age and older still use the word amongst themselves but don't consider it to be racists much like it's used amongst black rappers and people. When I tell the older generation that is Paula Dean's age that it is seen as racist they laugh at me and explain that it's a generational thing. That growing up they all used it and it wasn't seen as racist. That I wouldn't understand and they aren't using it to be racists much like ladymoreta described growing up. She was accustomed to it because of those around her and wasn't aware of it's offensiveness but rather of it being used like a descriptor in a cultural context.

To know where Paula Dean was coming from I can't say I know what her intentions where when it was used by her twenty years ago. I'm also not really following the story but I do see the internet meme's and fallout all over social media but I don't really care to look into the issue much further than what presents itself and crosses my path.

[MrsK]

There is a history of oppressed groups taking ownership of slurs to diminish the power those words have to oppress them. This goes back to yankee doodles and beyond. When the dominant group uses that slur, the intention is presumed to be different.

[PrincessFiona]

To be honest. I feel like I shouldn't have shared. I have worked very hard at making sure my kids are culturally sensitive. We talk openly about gay marriage and as a family are very open when it comes to recognizing different cultures, ethnic identities, and sexual orientation.

I nearly had an aneurism when I heard this and the "its just a song" thing has really stuck with me. To them it is just a song. (A bad one). It is a song that removes the understanding of the power of that word. I got the "...but I would never use that word." which brought a "you just did." "But it's a song, not the real word".
What?!
Why does society make it so hard to teach our children good values? I just can't keep up. I can't censor what they hear. I thought I taught them good values.
I doubt they sing this song again ever after my response, but what the hell is happening in society where this shit is put out on the market for my kids to be exposed to?

[MrsK]

Why does society make it so hard to teach our children good values?

It's the lowest common denominator. That and the fact that we enjoy being scandalized and subjecting our celebrities to public stonings. That's why people like Paula Deen are held to a higher standard. If she enjoys celebrity and wealth among an educated, middle-class demographic while tossing around racial slurs, we are failing. We are trying to teach our kids to do better than average. It's never easy to rise above.

[marciaquezada]

It's the lowest common denominator. That and the fact that we enjoy being scandalized and subjecting our celebrities to public stonings. That's why people like Paula Deen are held to a higher standard. If she enjoys celebrity and wealth among an educated, middle-class demographic while tossing around racial slurs, we are failing. We are trying to teach our kids to do better than average. It's never easy to rise above.

MrsK, you are ABSOLUTELY right. I find that being a celebrity comes witha certain sense of responsibility. In terms of PD, I think, unfortunately actions that she did many years ago finally caught up with her. However, I think that the corporations that she was working under represent a clean, cookie cutter image.. What confuses me about this situation is that corporations pulled the rug under her feet on a comment she made.. But other celebrities do worse shit.. Like, Kim Kardashian Amanda Bynes, etc..etc.. You don't see corporations not endorsing them for stupid behavior.. I don't condone any of her actions, but think that everyone should be held to the same standards.. Personally, I think the Kardashians are HORRIBLE examples for young women in society today... They are self absorbed media whores..

I don't have kids yet, but I understand and respect parents who don't let kids watch TV anymore... (Even though it seems like an impossible feat..) So much trash is in music & TV.. I fear for the kind of life my children will have in a couple years.. Oy!

[MrsK]

As far as I know, Amanda Bynes doesn't have any corporate endorsements. The Kardashians have different corp endorsements than PD did - not Walmart or Food Network which cater to middle class, middle aged, mid-america. I've worked for WM before and they have very agressive minority providor policies - like they even reqire that their legal team include women and ethnic minorities and they will drop you in a heartbeat if anything smells rotten. The Kardishians' sponsors are more MTV, Sears juniors dept, Sephora... It's a younger demographic. They are selling sex and scandal and easy fame to teenagers. That's different than selling cookbooks to housewives. PD, Martha Stewart, Kathy Lee - they have a different image to uphold and controversy does not help them the way it helps the Kardashians.

[MrsK]

Also, I suspect that if the Kardashians made bigoted statements, they'd loose sponsors too. While their customors may be ok with being linked with home-made porn, they are not ok with being perceived as bigots by association.

[Cinderella]

This article explained to me a lot better what I've been puzzling over.

Paula Deen, the N-word, and Sh*t Black Folks Can't Say

Oh, and about the other thing I mentioned where it's a generational thing. I was discussing Paula Deen and this topic with my half Korean half Chinese American friend and she pointed out the movie Gran Torino. Clint Eastwood plays a racists but he's really not racists per say. The language is just generational and he makes a point about it. Brilliant movie by the way if any of you have never seen it.