Santa

[PrincessFiona]

Do you "do" Santa?

Some people consider it lying. Others feels it's a fun holiday tradition. Where do you stand?


We love Santa in our house. We've done it for all of our kids (including dressing up on Christmas Eve and putting the gifts under the tree). All adults in our house get Santa gifts and none of our kids have been harmed by believing in and eventually growing out of believing in Santa.

[MrsK]

No, but
we don't do Christmas either. However, this year we've gotten a lot of questions about Santa and I don't want my kids spoiling it for their friends. (Yesterday, I overheard K1 telling his friend that her mom will grow old and die someday. Yikes! ) So, we talk about Santa even though he doesn't come to our house.

[v-girl]

We do Santa, but he doesn't give the biggest gifts to the kids. We used to do that and I got sick of being outdone by him. 😂 We also do St. Nicholas when I remember.

[Vanquisher]

We never have. I've posted my reasons before.


Heidi

[Vanquisher]

We don't do Santa. And, it's more than just the lying thing that bugs me.

1. The lying. Yes, it is the number one reason. Yes, before we went to Disney, I did prep my kids that the characters aren't real. It's just a lie on top of a lie on top of a lie. You have to keep lying. It does undermine trust.

2. It's creepy. I don't want my kids thinking some weirdo is watching them all the time. Elf on a shelf exacerbates this.

3. I've seen too many screaming kids forced to sit on Santa's lap. And this is fun? Alexia says he probably smells like ham. I think he probably smells like booze and cigarettes.

4. Chad has taken care of at least one "Santa" in the hospital. A real gem. Class A pervert who wanted to make sure his nurses shaved their pubic hair among other things.

5. I think it takes AWAY from the spirit of giving, not enhances it. We give because we love and care about people, especially individuals in our lives. We don't need some stranger with a sweat shop full of elves doing it in our stead. We want to give and we want to see our kids want to give.

6. The inequality of it all. So, was Frankie a better kid than Sally because he's a little shit a school, but he got 45 presents. He told me at school. Sally got a doll and socks. She's the nicest girl I know!

7. It can be crushing or at least sad to find out he's not real. You've stood up for him at school. You look like an idiot. Thanks.

8. Is more magical and loving that your parents pull this off for you!! They appreciate some of the amount of work that you do and are more grateful, IMO. Can they appreciate it fully? Not yet, but it's better than the Santa crap.

I actually hate Santa and it pisses me off when strangers ask my kids about him especially in front of other kids who do believe. My kids handle it well and go along with it because they've been taught that they shouldn't ruin this "fun" horrible thing for other kids.

This is what I wrote before.


Heidi

[MAPPLEBUM]

My parents didn't with me, and I definitely tried ruining it for my friends (they didn't believe me)

The flip side is yesterday I had a high school senior tell me she "knows the secret" about Santa Clause. Uh, yea, I'd hope you'd know by now...

[Pollyanna]

I believe in Santa and we have always done Santa gifts - as part of my family (since I don't have kids) and my niece gets Santa gifts too. I don't think it's a lie because for us, Santa is the spirit of giving. In society he's based on Saint Nicholas but in practice, Santa is a feeling. The red suit and all that is just an embodiment of the intent, which is to be a little kinder, a little more thoughtful, and just a little nicer for a brief time each year. So yes, I am pro-Santa!

Yes, exactly this. I love Santa

We aren't visitors of Santa though, standing in a crowded line is not Santa to me

[MsSassyBaskets]

I'm with Heidi, we won't be doing Santa if it's up to me. I think DH is a little more relaxed about it, and I'm sure the grandparents will try to push it but we'll probably just acknowledge it as a fun story and not let them try to trick the kid.

I've said it before, but because we're atheists I struggle with the idea of celebrating the holiday at all. If it was up to only me we wouldn't, but it's important to DH and his family. Holiday family get-togethers with the extended ILs are so wonderful and loving, and THAT'S what I want to pass on to my kid. To me the ONLY reason to celebrate is family. Holidays are our opportunity to give to family and friends, spend time with them, and show them how much we care.

And this is going to come off really badly, I know, but for I don't plan to teach my kid that any imaginary characters or creatures are real, period. For me that includes God. What would it say if I tell her we don't believe in God but we believe in Santa? That's messed up. We will respectfully acknowledge that other families believe in/practice God, Santa, the Easter Bunny, the Tooth Fairy, the Elf, etc. etc. and do our best to teach our kid(s) that we respect those beliefs and practices and traditions, but we don't have them ourselves. I recognize that this will come off as offensive to some, but to me they are all somewhere on the spectrum between imaginary and mythical.

That's not to say I'm going to be a total wet blanket when it comes to her own imagination and inventions--to me those are very different than adults force-feeding kids myths and telling them they're real.

[Vanquisher]

^^^yes


Heidi

[GreyhoundsRUs]

We don't do or not do Santa. Gifts come from us, and Santa is presented as a historical figure who was a kind and generous Saint, the embodiment of giving. I think it takes away from the sacrifice and meaning of the giving - if all these presents come from a magical man who has an endless supply of money/labor, and I don't get what I want, then WTF

We focus on Christmas being about Jesus's birth - gifts are to celebrate his birth, and we eat cupcakes and sing Happy Birthday to Him.

That being said, I don't think there is anything wrong or harmful or whatever in "doing" Santa. It's just not something we focus on as a family

[poky]

Santa always only ever brought stocking gifts to us, never anything big, and he was never emphasized. I don't remember ever actually actively believing in him as an actual person with magic. Maybe I've just always been too pragmatic? The low-key approach makes sense to me, and is probably what I'd do if we had kids.

[MrsK]

I must say, telling people that "we don't do Santa" is accepted better than telling people that we are Jewish or that we don't celebrate Christmas. It just gets an "okay" and no awkward stammering about how our kids get 8 gifts or whatever conciliatory thing people feel like they have to say.

[oceanchild]

I am not crazy about Santa and won't play it up, but I suspect we will "do" some Santa. Fortunately, at one, we haven't had to discuss this with my son yet.

My mom tells me she tried to not do Santa and I wanted to believe so badly that she felt like she had to. We got some gifts from Santa and occasionally visited him. I don't think my parents made a big deal of it.

[Thirteen]

Santa brings stocking stuffers at our house.


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[ladymoreta]

I love Santa! This year Santa will bring them the gifts they've asked for, and we will get them other things. That's generally how my parents did it. We don't stress the part about being good and Santa watching them. I don't do the Elf on the Shelf.

I think I'm probably going to slip up and give it away early. I'm pretty terrible at keeping it a secret... We'll probably still keep doing it, though. I think it's fun!