Announcement

Collapse

Facebook Forum Migration

Our forums have migrated to Facebook. If you are already an iMSN forum member you will be grandfathered in.

To access the Call Room and Marriage Matters, head to: https://m.facebook.com/groups/400932...eferrer=search

You can find the health and fitness forums here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/133538...eferrer=search

Private parenting discussions are here: https://m.facebook.com/groups/382903...eferrer=search

We look forward to seeing you on Facebook!
See more
See less

Refugees

Collapse
X
 
  • Filter
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts

  • Refugees

    Hopefully, this won't get too heated.

    I know this is a hot topic and that when I tell you that I am skeptical of refugees, you will call me a xenophobic racist. I'm not. I'm just really on the fence about this issue right now. St. Cloud is a hub for Somali refugees and I have been supportive of this community. Minneapolis is also another area where Somali refugees settled. I have welcomed these people into the community and initially I thought that we did the right thing by accepting them into our country. Problem? Their culture is not compatible with ours. The men view women and second class citizens. They refuse medical care for their wives and the ethics board at the hospital has had to get involved on multiple occasions. Recently, it has come to the attention of the authorities that many of the young, Somali Men have made attempts to leave the country to fight for ISIS. An investigative report of the Somali community hear revealed that they do not agree with American Law and want only Sharia Law implemented. The women believe that the fathers should choose the husband's for their daughters and that they should marry at 15. They all live off of government assistance.

    If I moved to Germany, it would be expected that I follow German Law ... and if I left the country to fight for ISIS, I would be deported... and Sharia Law? Go home then.

    Kris
    ~Mom of 5, married to an ID doc
    ~A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss

  • #2
    "I know that you are going to call me names" doesn't sound like an invitation to a conversation. I can hear that you feel confused and frustrated about this situation. I am sorry that there is this economic and cultural strain in your community. I hope there is a resolution that you can be happy with.

    Alison

    Comment


    • #3
      I know the Somali immigrants in the Cities have had huge issues with melding. I often wonder how much of that is exacerbated by living in an enclave.

      Here, it is a much smaller community and we have a large Hmong population that arrived in the late 80's and early 90's. There were definitely a lot of issues with assimilation into the community. Now that we are a full generation out from their arrival, it is different. The kids tend to be fully bilingual, they work in a variety of jobs, own homes, etc.

      My understanding is that they held some similar attitudes towards marriage and women's roles in society and the family. But the kids are not holding to the more oppressive parts of the traditional culture. There is an active Hmong cultural center and they do a lot of outreach, particularly during their New Year celebrations.

      I think it can be successful, but both sides have to want it to work.

      If we have the attitude that the refugees are going to be a problem, then they will.
      Kris

      Comment


      • #4
        I taught in a few high schools (before kids so a million years ago) with significant Hmong and Somali immigrant populations. I will admit the men and teenage boys I came in contact with were tough to deal with -- at first. The women were amazing. The female students were so thankful for the education and attention to their studies they worked their asses off and never acted out that I know of.

        The boys ultimately wanted female attention and they learned that being what we consider misogynistic would make them shunned by their own teenage girls and American boys and girls. They were lonely and angry. A few I knew learned to "talk the talk" at home around their dads but most started changing their ways at school. It was a SLOW process but change happened.

        I agree with the sentiment that it takes a few generations before the cultural norms to shift. It happens however. I had a student who was 16 call the police because her teenage Hmong husband was beating her on a regular basis. Her father disowned her for calling the police so she moved in with an aunt who had been in the country for over 10 years. The teenage bride got divorced and eventually went on to college. I'm pretty sure she's a nurse now, married an American and have two beautiful children.

        She will teach her children differently than she was taught ... and so it begins.
        Flynn

        Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

        “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

        Comment


        • #5
          I wish I had a computer to respond on. I have so many thoughts. This is such a heated topic in my community right now. There is blatant racism and xenophobia in St Cloud. People are literally stopping their cars in the middle of the street to yell at the Somali immigrants to go home. I have a Muslim friend here who actually immigrated from Nicaragua. She works as a translator. Jenn, she also tells me that the women are wonderful but that the men are problems. I think it will take generations for there to be assimilation. In the meantime, the attitudes of the Somali men towards women and work seem to be perpetuating racism. This comes at a critical time when we as a country seem unable to embrace refugees. It's scary. It's also hard to discuss because I have real concerns about how women and girls are treated. I also resent the 'no work' attitude of the men. It is the women who are working hard to learn English. Some of them are leaving their husbands and are getting jobs. I feel like I can't say that I have concerns though without someone accusing me of being a Trump supporter. So I am mostly silent.


          Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
          ~Mom of 5, married to an ID doc
          ~A Rolling Stone Gathers No Moss

          Comment


          • #6
            I hope things get resolved, everyday that passes by I see how bad things have gotten... It's a sad world to be raising children in...

            Comment


            • #7
              very political post--not pc post.. the thing with refugee is --who think cause all those refugees to begin with.. they had a home to begin with.. but a govt came in with gun's blazing. what do you expect to happen? you would think the country/people that cause the refugee crisis would be more welcoming. you break it, you fix it is the modo. sadly, that's not how the world works.

              Comment

              Working...
              X