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To donate or not?

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  • To donate or not?

    I'm wondering how everyone feels about giving money to charities. Today is the Red Cross Drive where people are going around door to door, on the street, wherever to collect money. I usually give money unless I get hit up by more than 3 people by then the change in my pocket is sucked up. DH had a small fit when I said I give a little bit when they ask me. He thinks most charities are frauds, with good reason I guess.

    Well I will give today if I get asked. I have to honestly admit though alot of times I get hit up coming out of the store with two kids in tow and I just can't be bothered and sometimes I feel like I'm asked to give 3 or plus more times in a day, I get tired of it.

  • #2
    When it comes to giving, I definitley try to keep in mind the old principle (and harsh truth) that "if you economically reward a behavior, you're increasing it's likelihood of being repeated." I try and ask myself before I get out my wallet if this is something I want more of or something I want less of.

    I try to handle my giving thus: With rare exceptions, I don't give on the fly. I don't want my giving to be based on what mood I was in when they happened to ask me, I want it to be based on the work that they're doing and the reputation of the charity. Therefore I usually do my yearly giving all at once, in November, and I sit down, look at how much I'm giving, consider who I've decided to give it to, and just write out checks (or go online an do it via credit card) and get it done. That way I know exactly how much I'm giving and to whom and I can budget for it and I can remember how long it's been since the last time I gave, etc., rather than having an uneven trickle sneaking out the bottom of my pocket and having the squeaky wheel get the oil. When I'm asked for money in other months I decline, but I make a mental note to consider them for November.

    I also try not to encourage charities to incur any more administrative costs than is necessary. I still get more charity junk mail than I'd like, definitely. But they don't have to send me a prize, they don't have to buy me dinner, they don't have to spend any money to get my money. Of course, it doesn't really work that way in reality, since they have to have at least done something that made me aware of them in the first place, but generally try to avoid having them spend any of my money back on me.

    I sometimes make exceptions to all of this for situations where kids are doing the work of the fundraising, but that gets tricky. I'll ususally participate if it's apparent that it's not a scam.

    It's tough stuff, the charitible giving, and just like domestic politics it gets into a lot of philosophy about who needs and deserves help and what's the best way to help them and how do we best put limited resources toward unlimited need. I understand and accept that other people have philosophies very different than my own (like helping person-to-person rather than through large organizations), and I don't dismiss that, but I still subscribe to mine.
    Married to a hematopathologist seven years out of training.
    Raising three girls, 11, 9, and 2.

    “That was the thing about the world: it wasn't that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn't expect.”
    Lev Grossman, The Magician King

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    • #3
      Sorry if I sound like a wanker --obviously November is coming up so this is on my mind, plus it's an election year, so the differing ways that people view our responsibilities to others is also on my mind.
      Married to a hematopathologist seven years out of training.
      Raising three girls, 11, 9, and 2.

      “That was the thing about the world: it wasn't that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn't expect.”
      Lev Grossman, The Magician King

      Comment


      • #4
        How I donate to causes:

        1) I never, ever give to "the man on the street" whether it's a homeless person or someone on the street corner asking for support for a cause (on the National Mall it's a HUGE and annoying problem) I have worked in the homeless system here and there are resources available. Not a lot and not the best, but they are there-

        2) Because of the limited resources, I give my money to causes I believe in- in my own particular way of seeing things- 1) the environment because if we can't breathe, we can't do anything else 2) causes near and dear to my heart due to family illnesses- alzheimer's disease, MS, Childrens' Hospital, etc. 3) My crazy liberal politics- I do put my money where my mouth is and 4) local community charities- like the charities for homeless people, etc.

        3) I have watched as my own former executive director skimmed off the top of donations (she took the Chanel suits and nice clothes donated to the shelter) so I give my clothing and stuff to Goodwill as I KNOW they work with people with disabilities. (another cause near and dear to my heart- but in my position as a Fed, I don't donate cash to any local agencies because I might end up surveying them and that would be bad)

        Jenn

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        • #5
          99% of the time, I don't give money to people door-to-door, on the street, etc.
          We set a goal and try to meet it every month and make donations when we pay our bills (though I totally agree about the admin burden this creates, Julie).

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          • #6
            DH and I are pretty picky about who we donate to. Our two biggest charities are a new cardiac center for the hospital and the local SPCA. The SPCA does not get funds from the ASPCA and relies totally on donations. In addition to monetary gifts, I often check their wish list online and bring in a bunch of stuff. I'm forbidden from actually volunteering there though - we already have 2 dogs and 3 cats. (We did have FOUR cats until I was able to pass one off on my grandma.)

            We're sticklers for only donating to charities without huge overheads. We also never, ever donate to the United Way. I think it was back in the late 80s when the head of that was caught skimming the funds. Plus, they practically browbeat you into donating and that plain pisses me off.

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            • #7
              I used to be a sucker who would give moeny to any and every cause that called me on the phone. Now I mainly give to my church and a few pet causes. Around Christmas time I try to make sure I have coins handy to drop into the Salvation Army kettles outside the stores and depending on my mood I will give a couple bucks to the guys on the street holding up signs asking for money--they may be buying booze with it but I give it to them anyway. A few times I've had a piece of fruit or granola bars in the car and I've given them that instead and they seemed appreciative.
              Awake is the new sleep!

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              • #8
                I just heard about this site and it looks well-done:

                http://www.charitynavigator.com

                It seems helpful in determining which charities are well-run and which are lame.
                Married to a hematopathologist seven years out of training.
                Raising three girls, 11, 9, and 2.

                “That was the thing about the world: it wasn't that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn't expect.”
                Lev Grossman, The Magician King

                Comment


                • #9
                  I never give cash to the guys who beg on the street. Sometimes, however, I'll pick up a meal for them from the local fast food joint. I always drop some change into the Salvation Army kettles at Christmas. I also clean out my closets about every 2-3 months and donate to Goodwill.

                  Other than that, I donate mostly to local organizations (animal shelters, schools, scholarship funds, etc.) They usually have a lower overhead and I can see that my money is being put to good use.

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                  • #10
                    Originally posted by EDWife
                    Other than that, I donate mostly to local organizations (animal shelters, schools, scholarship funds, etc.) They usually have a lower overhead and I can see that my money is being put to good use.
                    My sentiments exactly!!

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                    • #11
                      I have a couple charities that I make donations to annually other than that the only door to door I will even consider are for the schools and even those are getting to the point that I say no to most of them.
                      Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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