Gay Marriage

[HeartRN]

I just read Sue's blog, and it prompted me to start this thread. How does everybody feel about this topic?

Truth be told (from a Bush supporter), I honestly don't have serious issues with gay marriage, provided that....

1. We don't change the constitution
2. There's some sort of watchdog (*bleh*) or other mechanism to prevent Jo Blow from marrying his dog, sister, brother, etc......

This leads to my subtopic question--do you think a gay partner should be allowed to make decisions on behalf of their partner who is incapacitated (before the patient's immediate family can make health decisions?)

What do you all think?

Yes, I do think a partner in a gay relationship should be able to make medical decisions. I'm not sure how much of an issue this really is, but it was brought up a lot re: the amendment in OR (to specify marriage in the state constitution). But, how do you enforce or define that without putting some guidelines and definitions into the relationship?

On that topic, and one of recent experience, I think that no matter what, everyone should have a medical power of attorney that is on file with their doctor and on hand of the person(s) designated. It makes a difficult time easier and reduces a potential stress. Everyone should have one but especially someone who is concerned that the representative they want is not the one that would be selected in a situation where they can't make their own medical decisions.

DH has seen some sad, sad cases of people's medical wishes not be respected. (Not related to gay relationships, either).

I think the Constitution should be left alone too -- on both sides of this.

.....breaking my fingers .....as....I type....to keep.....from making...... terrible.....elementary joke......about......Jo Blow....being mentioned..... in the Gay Marriage thread....... )

[mommax3]

Matt that totally cracked me up and made me laugh out loud......it scared my dog, as a matter of fact.

Sally

[SueC]

Well, I pretty much feel how I said I felt in my blog. I think its nuts that so many Americans feel so passionately that gays should not marry. Heterosexuals sure haven't done much to uphold the sanctity of marriage if you look at the rate of divorce and infidelity. I really don't think allowing gay people into the mix will bring the institution of marriage down. And I mean no offense to the divorcees here. I'm really a live and let live kind of person so if my neighbors are a couple of gals that are married, so be it. Actually, I've got a lot of neighbors that are gay, and it doesn't bother me at all. And I really don't mind that my 4 and 3 year old notice that little Gabe down the street has 2 mommies. Actually they think that is pretty cool. I cringe whenever I hear politicians talking about defending marriage in our country (or whatever way they phrase it, I can't remember right now). Why is it any of government's business? Anymore "family" could mean grandma raising the kids, single dads, single moms, gay parents, or the typical nuclear family. It's all good.

[PrincessFiona]

Sue,

I agree...and I disagree. Not for religious reasons, but because I do like the idea of the traditional man/woman marriage. You rae right though that we 'heteros' sure don't have the monopoly on making marriage work.

I don't know how I feel about gay marriage...I don't support a constitutional ban. I support civil unions, I support the right of gay couples to have the same legal rights afforded to heterosexual married couples....using the word marriage is hard for me though.

kris

[DCJenn]

I don't give a rat's ass who people sleep with at night (or during the day for that matter) as long as they respect EACH OTHER. and for that, if I had a partner that I have spent a lifetime with, you can be damned sure that is the person I want holding my hand by my bed and getting all of my cold hard cash at the end.

I have gay relatives, gay friends, gay co-workers and a TON of gay neighbors, (even the republicans next door. yup- gay guys) and really, who the hell am I to tell them how to live their lives. Should I start telling them where to shop and what cars to drive? What meds to take?

as Rush Limbaugh gets ready to marry #4, but not yet divorced from #3, and Bill O'Reilly sexually harrasses his producer. What f-ing ever. Paragons of virtue.

Jenn

[SueC]

using the word marriage is hard for me though.

kris

But why?? (That is supposed to be said in a whiney voice like my 3 year old.) At the end of the day if Lisa and Mary (picked those names out of the clear blue sky) are "married" how will it affect you? Will it make your marriage somehow different or less special?

[BonBon]

Kris the word 'marriage' is a bit difficult for me as well, though I certainly support civil unions. Funny that I trip over the marriage word, when I'm an atheist anyway. There really isn't a difference between marriage and civil unions. (to me)

Why is it any of government's business?

Sue, that is my big beef with a lot of things!!!

[PrincessFiona]

Jennifer, Sue...I agree with you...it's just hard for me to come around to using the word marriage...because.....it's a tradition...I guess.

But take it at face value...I also didn't want to go from a traditional tape player to a CD player..and fought it....when Thomas wanted to get a DVD player I told him "it will never catch on, lets not waste our money" When he wanted to join NetFlix I said it was a waste of money and probably a scam....I'm slow to catch up.

But I believe that gay people have the right to the same relationships as heterosexuals and that those relationships are just as real...just as valid.

kris

But take it at face value...I also didn't want to go from a traditional tape player to a CD player..and fought it....

(Laughing with you....)

[BonBon]

Not to hijack this thread, but Kris, we STILL don't have a DVD player. Unless you count the one that's on the computer!

[mommax3]

I think I am pretty much with Kris on this one. It does have to do with religious reasons, HOWEVER, I also agree that heterosexuals have not set the bar very high when it comes to committed relationships, and those of us with strong religious beliefs need to realize that we have to deal with the fallout that has resulted from people on the right living in a "do as I say, not as I do" kind of fantasy that has been perpetuated by those that Jenn mentioned, as well as many others.

I too have gay friends (GASP!) and want them to be able to be with the ones they love when they reach the ends of their lives, and I want them to be able to do what they want with their money after they are gone.

But "marriage" to me is a man and a woman.......I can deal with civil unions, but not calling it marriage.

Sally

Not only is it a matter of a legal contract for the disposition of property and finances that any two adults should be allowed to enter into without the government's interference, but for me it is also an issue of gender equality.

I intend to teach my sons and daughters that their gender doesn't determine their choices in life. How am I supposed to reconcile that with telling them that if they choose a life partner of one gender, they are permitted one path and if they choose a partner of another gender, they are restricted to a separate (but equal!) path?