Love for spouse vs love for children.

My parents didn't have sex for the last decade or so of their marriage, but I honestly doubt that no nookie was the death of their passion and love for one another.

[KCwife]

Hmmm. Well, I don't think that I love my husband MORE than my children. BUT, I do make an effort to put him ahead of them in my order of priorities some times. Why? Because it is in my nature, and every other mothers nature, to put your children first. Because the girls take up SOOO much of my time, I think that every once in awhile it is a good idea to stroke my DH's ego, and show him that he is a top priority. I also think that it is good for my daughters to see that I adore their father, and that he adores me. I think that it gives children security in knowing that their parents love each other.

On the death thing. I think that is really weird. Simply because in the realm of life on Earth, you have a 50% chance of losing your spouse. (The other 50% is that your spouse might lose you). I don't think that any individual is set up to deal with the loss of a child. You aren't suppossed to have to do that. Your children should lose you, not the other way around. Case in point, we buy life insurance for our spouses, but NOT for our children. (I bet this lady does) Eeeek.


Amber

Boat thing

Oh, one other thing.... kind off subject.
On the boat analogy. I once had another mom ask me "If you and your kids were in a boat, and it tipped, and you could only save one, who would it be?" I was flabbergasted, what a horrible question! The only answer I could come up with was that I would probably drown attempting to save both regardless....the really weird thing is that she then said. "Oh, I would save Ashley," Ashley was one of her FOUR kids. I would hate to be any of the other three.

[KCwife]

Re: Boat thing

Oh, one other thing.... kind off subject.
On the boat analogy. I once had another mom ask me "If you and your kids were in a boat, and it tipped, and you could only save one, who would it be?" I was flabbergasted, what a horrible question! The only answer I could come up with was that I would probably drown attempting to save both regardless....the really weird thing is that she then said. "Oh, I would save Ashley," Ashley was one of her FOUR kids. I would hate to be any of the other three.

Sorry, this post was me, I was logged out!

[mommax3]

I think, like a lot of other posters, that this chick is weird. I do tend to prioritize my husband over the kids at times, because otherwise, the kids take up all available "space" in our household. My husband does this for me also. I think it is good to teach the kids to respect us as adults, but having said that, our very lifestyle has been determined by our desire for them to have the best school experience, private music lessons, etc., so they are definitely not second-class citizens around here!

As for choosing my kids over my husband......why does that scenario continue to surface? Can't we just say it would be a horrible choice to be faced with and leave it at that? Really, I think in that situation I would either drown myself or just all go down together, but realistically, I don't think I will be faced with it and would rather not consider it at all.

I think what she hears at mommy and me regarding how often people are "getting some" and what is really true are probably two different things. It sounds like the moms are trying to one-up each other about how dedicated they are......but I equate that to male locker-room exaggeration (not that any of the males around here have ever done any thing like that ) at this point in my motherhood career and don't put a lot of stock in what I overhear in those types of group conversations.

I do feel sorry for her kids, especially (like someone else already said) when they get old enough to read what she has written.

Sally

[Rapunzel]

You know, in the recent tsunami that hit southeast Asia there were several reported incidents where mothers literally had to decide which child to save because they could only hold onto one in the water. Very awful decision to have to make. I don't know what I would do in that situation. But, sometimes these difficult hypotheticals become reality. Thankfully, that doesn't appear to be too often in the modernized Western world!

Jennifer

[SueC]

Re: Boat thing

Oh, one other thing.... kind off subject.
On the boat analogy. I once had another mom ask me "If you and your kids were in a boat, and it tipped, and you could only save one, who would it be?" I was flabbergasted, what a horrible question! The only answer I could come up with was that I would probably drown attempting to save both regardless....the really weird thing is that she then said. "Oh, I would save Ashley," Ashley was one of her FOUR kids. I would hate to be any of the other three.

That's insane! Did she explain why she would pick that particular child?

[KCwife]

Re: Boat thing

That's insane! Did she explain why she would pick that particular child?[/quote]

I didn't feel comfortable with the conversation after that point. So, I didn't ask for an explanation. The whole thing felt icky.