Question for SAHMs

This may be a silly question, but I'm going to ask it anyways. For those of you who were SAHMs while your husbands were going through medical school, how did you make it work financially? My husband and I have discussed the possibility of starting our family while he's still in his med school years, but I don't know how that's possible. I'm the sole income provider while he's in school, so if we were to have children and I were to stay home with them, there would be no money coming in. Is it just a matter of taking out and relying on more loans?

Lots of people take out the max in loans, many will watch other children in their home, some do home sales (I did Tastefully Simple for a stint near the end), others have family help, some go into massive, massive consumer debt, or a combination of all of the above!

If you're going to do it, try to save up as much as you can. Whatever you do, don't pin your decisions on "he'll be making big money in X years", b/c that will come back to bite you.

[peggyfromwastate]

We had 3 kids before med school. When DH started med school, I was already a SAHM. We knew how daunting financing it all is, so we went with the military option, although we would have been able to make it through the non-military route too. DH was accepted at our state university med school, which would have been affordable, and with family help and loans I probably would have continued to be a SAHM until kids 2 and 3 (twins) were in school. BUT I doubt we would've had more kids. That extended my SAHM tenure a lot, and kids are expensive!!!

Ulitmately for us, we took the military funding. They put DH through medical school (at the military medical school in fact), we get a nice housing bonus, we have healthcare covered (a HUGE benefit), the salary is for 12 months of the year, unlike some financial aide stipends which would only be for 9 months during med school... Of course the military will get their money's worth out of us. It worked for us because DH was interested in a military career long before medical school. I don't think the military route is a good fit for everyone...

[Chrisada]

I watch two boys at home three days a week and we take out cost of living loans from school. But we are looking at the military for residency.

[MarissaNicole]

I watch two boys at home three days a week and we take out cost of living loans from school. But we are looking at the military for residency.

Guard options?

[Chrisada]

DH has always wanted a military career, he considered the Naval Academy for college. So he is looking at the Navy. I talked him out of it for medical school, but I'm considering it more for residency. The money struggle gets old.

[peggyfromwastate]

PM me if you want some inside scoop on Navy medicine. DH knows a lot about it by working with Navy docs practically the whole time since he started this medical journey. The biggest thing that makes me glad DH didn't go Navy is the deployments on the ships. And the GMO/flight medicine tours, but I think you guys will dodge that bullet b/c your husband is already in residency.

ETA: you are already starting residency right?

[Chrisada]

Just PM'd you. I'm always looking for more info on this subject.

[bobk]

My husband and I have discussed the possibility of starting our family while he's still in his med school years, but I don't know how that's possible. I'm the sole income provider while he's in school, so if we were to have children and I were to stay home with them, there would be no money coming in. Is it just a matter of taking out and relying on more loans?

Everyone's financial situation is different, but generally I would advise taking out additional loan money to get through the final year and starting a family now. Having your first child is very stressful, especially the first three months or so. As difficult as medical school can be, I would rather have that time period fall during MS4 than PGY1. There's never a perfect or even a good time to have children during medical training. If you wait too long you may have trouble conceiving or having the number of children you are hoping for.

[v-girl]

I had 3 kids during med school (DH took the 9 year route of an MD/Ph.D.) but I worked the whole time -- went through one job change. Residency was a whole new ball game though and I didn't even last 6 months! I had quit my breadwinner job (I still made 10K more than DH), wiped out my 401K and eventually gave up my lovely gas-guzzling Ford Expedition.

[Chrisada]

I will say I am very grateful that we did not take out private loans during med. school. We have a friend with two small children also and they opted for private loans instead of her working. So now when residency starts this summer, the wife is going to have to find a job because the private loans will be due.

I think that the financial strain is a very valid concern!! I worked the first two years, but stayed home the last two years. I would not change a thing about what we did and my experiences have truly helped me to have a better understanding for many things I did not originally have. When I did work, we tried to save as much money as possible. Unfortunately, we were required to move for our clinical years and the cost of living greatly increased and we ended up getting pregnant with our second child. After a very difficult and long discussion, we decided to apply for government assistance. I know that many, many families do this and it is VERY controversial!!! However, I would NOT change a thing about our choices!! We did also take out residency relocation loans to pay for out rotations, interviews, and moving expenses (yet again!). We are horribly in debt, but we would have been anyways because of going to a private med school!! If you have any questions about our experiences, please feel free to PM me. I would be happy to share more thoughts with you!!