SAHM during training?

[moonlight]

Will your dh be able to moonlight?

It’s almost too cruel to even talk about. Since he is a FMG he isn’t allowed to moonlight until his fourth year in this state. Apparently there was a private practice here in town (we are in a rural area) that offered moonlighting in the past (to the residents in DH's department). There was some “issue” between the owner and the program director. Moonlighting opportunity currently not available. On the other hand he could drive to the Durham. He would need approval during his fourth year. So far, I have not heard of any residents moonlighting in his program. My gut says our PD would give us approval if we explained and asked for it.

Also, I talked with my assistant manager tonight. It looks like I might be able to keep this seasonal job every year. Meaning, I could return working every September – March until the end of residency.

[alison]

Tell me again which formula she's on?
When does her pediatrician say you can start trying others?
I would honestly try introducing other formula here and there at meals during the day. The 12-month well baby appointment seems like such an arbitrary marker to me...

[moonlight]

Tell me again which formula she's on?
When does her pediatrician say you can start trying others?
I would honestly try introducing other formula here and there at meals during the day. The 12-month well baby appointment seems like such an arbitrary marker to me...

Similac Almintum. I've tried giving her one scoop of regular Similac (couple months ago) mixed with her Almintum and she almost immediately had a reaction to it. She is feeding herself really well. We are down to 4 bottles a day. I was given a feeding schedule/sample menu at her 9mo visit (after asking for it). I asked twice if I could get her office the bottle sooner than 12 months and was told to wait until her 12 month old visit. Then we could "discus" what type of milk to give her at 12 months old. I almost dread the thought of trying out regular milk, soy, etc.

I guess I could try the regular formula again this week and see how she does???? What does your little girl drink now?

[MissCrabette]

Moonlight, they have Similac Alimentum on Amazon for $129.99 for 6 cans. That's about $21.67/can. I don't know if you feel comfortable buying it on eBay, but I imagine it would be safe if the seal is intact and the product not expired.

[ides]

We are doing it but are really struggeling. Dh is never able to take care of the boy so we'd have to hire care if I went back to work and we would end up pretty much where we are now. We are in the last year of residency so are hoping we can make it. We have no idea how we are going to move for fellowship though. The cost of living during fellowship will be much less and our salary will be almost the same as now. We are Living check to check, and are savings are gone- though they weren't much to begin with. I think you are doing great & making things work as best as you can!

[alison]

We tried weaning dd off of prevacid at 9 months. It was costing us over $100 for a one month supply with our new insurance with dh's new job. When we tried doing so at 9 months, dd was throwing up and just really fussy. We tried again after dd's 12-month well baby check up, and there was no change! She's the same without the medication.

After weaning dd off the prevacid, we moved on to weaning her off Similac sensitive. She was drinking the one that got recalled, and it has been tough to find the powder... So, I've moved her away from sensitive to Enfamil toddler formula with NO changes! She doesn't spit up or anything! It's like I've got a normal kid!

The strange thing is that at 11.5 months I ran out of sensitive formula and grabbed an old can of similac that I'd gotten as a sample. She spit up like crazy... So in just 1.5 months something resolved. That's why I suggested giving it a try. Somehow dd's reflux issues resolved in a matter of an instant just prior to turning one.

Have you tried similac sensitive? I have coupons for $2 off a liquid botte if you want to try!

[alison]

Oh btw: I'm supposed to move on to cow's milk, but
Dd barely eats anything, so there's no way she can just do milk. Thats why we are supplementing with the formula.

[HouseofWool]

Oh btw: I'm supposed to move on to cow's milk, but
Dd barely eats anything, so there's no way she can just do milk. Thats why we are supplementing with the formula.

Alison - when my niece was really little, she didn't eat much either. I remember my sister spiking her whole milk with cream and adding ensure type powders to her milk to help her get the calories she needed. Even today she is a skinny little thing and it is hard to get her to eat.

[moonlight]

Alison- I'm PMing you!

We are doing it but are really struggling. Dh is never able to take care of the boy so we'd have to hire care if I went back to work and we would end up pretty much where we are now. We are in the last year of residency so are hoping we can make it. We have no idea how we are going to move for fellowship though. The cost of living during fellowship will be much less and our salary will be almost the same as now. We are Living check to check, and are savings are gone- though they weren't much to begin with. I think you are doing great & making things work as best as you can!

Thanks for the support and thanks for posting something so real and honest. It's insane to think we are living this way with all the education and skills DH and I have put together. I try not to ever think of it in those terms, but when you are 10+ years on this path things start to creep in my mind. Part of me really understands why some doctors spend like crazy people when they get out of residency and go to work.

You really are doing an awesome job and have no reason to feel like a failure, I hope you believe us!

I think my situation is similar to ides: high COL area, living check to check, hubby with a schedule that means I would have had to get childcare to go back to work, even part-time. I think you should take advantage of the fact that your DH had a predictable schedule!! Seriously, I remember being slightly jealous when you were working on the census because something like that would have been great for me last year, but DH works so many evenings and almost every weekend. It's a positive thing for your DH to be able to spend quality time with your DD too.

We managed in PGY1 because I worked before DS was born, in PGY2 because we had a little saved from our time with 2 salaries. PGY3 was really tough. Now that he is moonlighting once or twice a month we have a little breathing space. We would still be screwed if we had any unexpected large expenses but I hope the fact that we are renting makes that less likely. We don't make any student loan payments yet aside from those which we have no choice (from undergrad). I know that our first years out of training will not be financially easy either, with all the student loans and saving for a home. It feels like a very long road right now.

I feel your pain on the FMG/license/moonlighting issue too. CA has a similar thing. DH got his full license half way through PGY3. Nobody here moonlights before then anyway, but he sure hated having his co-residents sign prescriptions!! I hope you can work something out with the PD for your DH's last year.

You have not failed at all. I consider you a hero. You know that you need to help you family and you are doing something about it. If you were to continue to live beyond your means and rack more debt that would be a different story. Continue to work hard and you child will thank you after you are done with your training.

[Meenah]

You are a hero!!!! You should look into applying for WIC, you may qualify. Also, the hospital your DH works at may allow him to purchase formula and diapers at a HUGE discount. Check with the nursery and the pharmacy. Most people don't even realize this.

[Michele]

We couldn't make it, even in a very low COL area....but we suck at budgeting and living cheaply....so I worked part time. This year (fellowship) we are accruing debt.

[houseelf]

For the exact reasons you stated, this is why I worked either full time or 3/4 time during the first 7 years of training. Fortunately, fellowship paid almost twice as much as the ridiculously low resident salary and we moved to a slightly lower COL city. After years of repressive residency finances, however, we got sloppy and accrued about $20,000 in debt which covered 2 years of my staying home and the expensive self-financed move.