Dealing with workplace politics

[PrincessFiona]

Without delving into the specifics of anyone's workplace politics, I'm curious about how you all deal with the political ins and outs of where you work. This is the first time for me that I've really been exposed to the behind-the-scenes going ons at my place of employment. I find it very difficult to remove myself from this. How do you manage political issues without getting involved and dragging yourselves into them?


kris

That's the million dollar question!
I don't know if I did a good job of it or not, but before I left my last employer there was a massive amount of workplace politics going on. The only person I really trusted for accurate information was my boss. Whenever anyone else talked to me about the goings-on, I would usually just not comment very much.

[SuzySunshine]

I too have learned to keep my mouth shut (which is very hard for me, I'm a gossip by nature!).

What I've learned to do is just be polite and keep my mouth shut when the conversation comes up and as far as getting involved in the politics I do my job, do other jobs that people ask me to do and again just be polite about it. I CAN'T STAND my current boss so it kills me to be nice to her but those are the politics!

I too have learned to keep my mouth shut (which is very hard for me, I'm a gossip by nature!).

I know....me too! Especially when I have an opinion about it.

[houseelf]

Kris,

This is a hard, hard topic that unfortunately crops up often. First, I don't socialize after work very often with fellow employees or tell them too much about my personal life. I have wonderful girlfriends who fill this gap for me and I enjoy their insight from their various professions and experiences a heck of a lot more. I know what I do...I want to hear about something different. After all, disclosing personal things to coworkers will ALWAYS filter throughout the office and will bite you in the butt. Also, Cheri is so correct....kill everyone with kindness. Smile and keep your thoughts to yourself as much as possible. Don't offer your opinion but sit and politely listen and then change the subject. Downloading about workplace inequities are what spouses and friends are for. Finally and most importantly, C.Y.A.: make sure that your boss has clear evidence of your work product and dedication. S/he is the one who really counts. That is my .02 on this tricky subject.

Kelly

Kris,

This is a hard, hard topic that unfortunately crops up often. First, I don't socialize after work very often with fellow employees or tell them too much about my personal life.

Finally and most importantly, C.Y.A.: make sure that your boss has clear evidence of your work product and dedication. S/he is the one who really counts. That is my .02 on this tricky subject.

Kelly

Kris,
I don't know if the above applies to your situation, but I absolutely agree. First regarding the socializing -- you never know when you may become the boss of your coworker or they may become yours -- or even a "team leader" type position. Same can happen with a co-worker you don't like or socialize with. That can change things pretty fast. And anything can change fast: assignments, their boss, your boss, loyalties, etc.
And absolutely CYA -- keep emails, update work evaluations on a regular basis (not just once a year), document any problems, etc.
And don't expect anyone that anyone will do as good a job as you in looking out for your best interests.

[Auspicious]

Smile and keep your thoughts to yourself as much as possible. Don't offer your opinion but sit and politely listen and then change the subject.

This is all really good advice and I especially agree with the idea that you NEVER want to compromise your professionalism, BUT I've also found that you don't want to be so professional that people start to think of you as aloof. I've been in snarky-political work situations in the past where when I've shown that I'm not really interested in playing these games or bashing my co-workers or whatever I've subsequently found myself "out of the loop."

Now what I try to do when the snark starts flying is listen sympathetically and respond with something diplomatic, so that the basher feels like you agree with them, but you haven't actually said anything bad about the bashee. Never saying anything bad about the bashee is paramount. So if someone says "So-and-so is so anal and has to complicate everything." I'll be like "Hmm, I hear what you're sayin'. I think it's because she really cares about quality, though." You have to always act like you have sympathy for both parties, even when you know one of them is evil/incompetent. Almost everyone has some redeeming quality you can point out. Alway be buidling diplomacy.

[PrincessFiona]

You guys have given great advice. I have a lot to think about. For me, work has also been a social outlet...until recently. That does make things more difficult, and I agree that I'll have to forget the idea of actual friendships which is hard....it's one of the main reasons that I really wanted to get out and do something outside of hte house...social interactions.

I'm just not good with politics...I don't understand why people aren't more upfront about things with each other and why there has to be the back-stabbing, etc....


kris

Kris,
I think you can still get the adult social interaction out of it. And I have developed a few lasting friendships out of work. But after my last work experience with going through a major transition, I realized that a little more caution is helpful. I would still go and get coffee with co-workers, chat with them, etc. but I wouldn't get very personal with them. That seemed to work pretty well for me.

I agree with Julie that you don't want to be aloof because you need to know what is going on. It can be a fine line to walk but you can get some great information by being willing to lend an ear but not a judgement.

I would also say that one should remember that co-workers come into situations with their own biases and perspectives. Another reason to not jump to conclusions or jump on someone else's bandwagon. A lot of the people I worked with did not like my last boss. I was hired for one job (not working for her) and a few months later switched to another (working for her). I was really kind of scared of her and dreading working for her. Turns out, she was an absolutely fabulous person to work for and a role model for women in business, IMO. I think the reason that people didn't like her is that she held them accountable and to high standards. I ended up liking that because I knew exactly what she expected of me. She was never mean or spiteful but sometimes just a little more honest than some people would have liked. I am so glad I realized that because I learned a lot from her and would have been miserable otherwise.

[Auspicious]

If I ever sounded like I thought I knew what I was talking about on this topic, I apologize, because navigating office politics is HARD and it's easy to find yourself in a darned-if-you-do-darned-if-you-don't situation. This was my fourth week at my new job (which overall I am loving, by the way) and I'm still trying to figure out everyone's motivations out.

This week's tricky event: I got cornered into revealing my age in front of a whole handful of my co-workers. I considered evading the question, but everyone would have been able to figure it out anyway, and it being cagey would have raised more eyebrows than just saying my age and brushing it off. Normally I wouldn't care, but it confirmed that I am, in fact, slightly younger than my assistant, and I've been having enough trouble adjusting to having an employee as it is .

Good luck to us all.

[houseelf]

Julie,

RE: the issue of being younger than your assistant...don't sweat it. Obviously, your employer felt that you have the skills and credentials necessary to command an assistant, age has nothing to do with it. (With this being said, there is that egalitarian, traditional side of me that would have to get used to this concept as well. )

Happy to hear the new job is going so well.

Kelly

[DCJenn]

Oh boy, Oh Boy...

I truly love what I do and I do believe that we do a good service for people.

but OMG- imagine office politics, except that add in local, state and National politics as a basis for YOUR office politics. Wow, a whole different ball of wax as a Fed, that's for sure.

You're never quite sure whose agenda whatever your doing falls under. Hmmm, am I here because my boss wants me to be, the region wants me to be, the central office wants me to be or is it luck of the draw. I swear it's enough to make me paranoid!

Jenn

[Meenah]

Wow, you guys make the ER seem like a playground. We are so busy and understaffed that there is no time for politics.
Luanne

Julie -- I have encountered that situation (having an employee younger than me) and it was kind of awkward. But I think it felt more awkward for me than her -- maybe because our ages are so far apart. When I took that position, she had been at the company longer than I had been alive. 8O I think what helped was that she liked her job and didn't have any aspirations for mine. In fact, several of the people working for me were older than I but all were relatively fulfilled in their current positions. It was the oldest one that I, personally, had a hard time with because she is my mom's age! Your assistant may feel differently....
Hang in there, though, and it will start to feel more normal. Perhaps your assistant has worked for someone younger than him/her before? Just wait until you have to give an annual review.

[Auspicious]

Thanks guys, I am adjusting to things. It certainly makes it easier that my assistant is both smart and contientious (basically, she's recently changed careers--one of the hordes of casualties of the dot-com breakdown).

I actually did have to do her annual review already, in my third week here! They had her previous supervisor write it up, and then I had to go over it with her. Everyone else had had training on how to do reviews (surprisingly, the whole concept of annual reviews is new around here) but I had missed that because I hadn't started yet. So I just had to wing it. I muddled through, but felt very inept.

Now she's started asking me questions about how to do things (and I actually know the right answers!) and I've started to accept that I AM the boss and that's okay.