Intro blip help

[Vishenka69]

I've been trying to attend more networking events to promote my business and meet others. I need a nice opening/intro blip that describes what I do and why people should hire me. Since you guys are my target audience, I wanted to run this by you. Please be honest and constructive. I can take it. Thanks.

Good morning. My name is Julie Mylnarsky and I am the owner of Envied Home. Envied Home provides decorating and staging services for your home or business. We take care of all aspects of the renovation, from creating the overall design to hiring and overseeing the contractors to sourcing furniture and final arranging of the accessories. We make redesign and staging a seamless and stress-free endeavor. Let our design turn your ideas into a dream home, an Envied Home.

[MDPhDWife]

I really like it! BTW, I love the name Envied Home.

[Vishenka69]

Just realized this is in the wrong forum. Can one of the admins please move it to Education and career.

[HouseofWool]

done

[Phoebe]

It sounds good to me!

[Ladybug]

I really like it. It's informative, honest and to-the-point. The same qualities I'd be looking for in a a designer.

[spotty_dog]

Good morning. My name is Julie Mylnarsky and I am the owner of Envied Home. Envied Home provides decorating and staging services for your home or business. We take care of all aspects of the renovation, from creating the overall design to hiring and overseeing the contractors to sourcing furniture and final arranging of the accessories. We make redesign and staging a seamless and stress-free endeavor. Let our design turn your ideas into a dream home, an Envied Home.

It makes me wish I *were* your target audience. I think the next to last sentence might want to be "redesign OR staging"? Because I was going along saying, "Mm, I should pick up that brochure," but then that last part made me pause and think, "But I'm not moving, so I don't need redesign AND staging."

[Vishenka69]

That's a very good point. I'll definitely make that change.

I asked DH's opinion and his reply was, "why can't you just say 'Hire me, I'm anal.'"

[Amiens]

That's a very good point. I'll definitely make that change.

I asked DH's opinion and his reply was, "why can't you just say 'Hire me, I'm anal.'"

Hmmm I wonder if anesthesiologists go around saying "Let me put you to sleep so I can sit and read for the next 4 hours."

Anyway, I like it, and I would hire you.

[scrub-jay]

Anyway, I like it, and I would hire you.

I plan to hire you when all this training crap is said and done.

[Vishenka69]

I plan to hire you when all this training crap is said and done.

It's a deal.

Thanks for all the comments. DH does walk around telling everyone that he puts people to sleep. He just doesn't mention what he does once they're under (in his case, this also includes random online research, Wii, gossiping and of course reading).

[HouseofWool]

Hell, I would hire you too if I could. I'm basically color stupid and too nervous to make a decision.

[spotty_dog]

When we moved in here, my SIL sketched us a floor plan and told us what furniture to buy, in what sizes, and where to put it, and gave us a color palette to work with. It was SO HELPFUL.

[Vishenka69]

When we moved in here, my SIL sketched us a floor plan and told us what furniture to buy, in what sizes, and where to put it, and gave us a color palette to work with. It was SO HELPFUL.

Kris, want me to do something like that for you? Do you have a floor plan you can send me (I would need all the measurements of each room)? I can pick out colors and do furniture setting and email it all.