Preparing for the match

[alotofyarn]

This. Absolutely. Keep your options open and be prepared for changes. I thought I had it covered when my employer agreed to a telecommuting plan and we matched in a state that allowed admission to the Bar on motion. I never anticipated that it would take 10 months to obtain admission on motion or that my employer would go out of business. My best advise is to be flexible, live modestly, and if it is at all possible try to accumulate some savings for potental rainy days.

We had a lot of savings until interviews! Although, we didn't end up spending quite as much as we had anticipated and saved, so we haven't completely drained everything. We're going to save everything we can from now on though and try to build our savings back up. My field doesn't require licensing or anything, so I at least don't have to worry about that.

[GrayMatterWife]

... my dh suggested I could find work as a receptionist in a law firm if we matched in an undesirable location.

Holy crap. SERIOUSLY? That's beyond insensitive and self-involved. You should have said, "Why don't you consider skipping the match and dump your whole medical career idea, and get a job as a medical transcriptionist so that I can be a successful law partner?" Medical transcriptionist is a fine and respectable job, but he'd be grossly over-qualified and bored to the point of humiliation.

I am pretty sure I would have gone completely apesh*t on DH if he'd suggested that. And my career was nothing as accomplished as yours...

[alotofyarn]

I'm in the thick of it. I'm a planner who can't really plan until mid-March. We shall see, all I can do is hope for the best. I am not even close to zen about the process.

It's such a frustrating process! I've had to explain the match to several colleagues who don't realize that we can't just choose where we go, that the match is binding, etc. It amazes me how few people understand how it all works.

[alotofyarn]

I also want to add that my career factored very heavily when we made our rank list for the Match. (First ranking cities where my firm had offices, then states where I could waive into the Bar, and so on.) In retrospect, we really weighed my career too heavily. Yes, I enjoyed my work, we were relying on my income, and we'd become accustomed to the lifestyle my career afforded for us but at the end of the day, it was just a job. One of many factors that should be considered when creating a rank list. When I think back to some of the hysterical fits I had during the Match and the plans we made on the basis of my career, it seems foolish now.

We initially did a lot of that, but my current colleagues all told me to go where we'd be happy and my career would be fine, so we're trying to listen to them. Not all of the places we ranked highly will be great for my careers, including our #1, but I know my husband will be happiest there, and that's the most important thing to me right now.

[alotofyarn]

Yep. This. But even so, my career trajectory was basically zero factor on our match list. Neurosurgery is just too difficult a match to risk throwing in non-neurosurgery considerations. I was lucky--it was eight years ago and the legal market was a lot better. I had a great job as an associate at a Big Firm in Dallas. I just refused to move for residency until I either had a good new job or collected a big year-end bonus that I was due. The first happened first, so I moved in September after DH moved for residency that prior June. But I was prepared to stay behind for an extra 6 or 7 months.

We've done long distance twice now - for a year and a half right after undergrad when we were dating and engaged (he stayed at our undergrad institution to get an MS, I went a few states away to get a PhD), then for a bit over a year the second time, a year and a half later when he finally got into med school and I was still finishing my PhD. We're not doing it again - I go where he goes and hope for the best with my job.

[MrsK]

Holy crap. SERIOUSLY? That's beyond insensitive and self-involved. You should have said, "Why don't you consider skipping the match and dump your whole medical career idea, and get a job as a medical transcriptionist so that I can be a successful law partner?" Medical transcriptionist is a fine and respectable job, but he'd be grossly over-qualified and bored to the point of humiliation.

I am pretty sure I would have gone completely apesh*t on DH if he'd suggested that. And my career was nothing as accomplished as yours...

Oh, I did. I believe that I suggested that he forego the match and clean bedpans instead. Also a fine and respectable job, but he'd be grossly over-qualified and bored to the point of humiliation. I was mulling over the partnership offer at the time and was *thisclose* to turning it down until he said that. The idea of answering telephones in a law firm made me crazy. I accepted the partnership offer the very next day -- although, in retrospect, it was a bad idea. I nearly lost my shirt when the senior partners ran the firm into the ground and the partnership was meaningless once I relocated to a different market.

alotofyarn, sorry for the hijack. I am probably coming off as rather bitter about the whole career thing or at least as though I consider career to be disposable. There is a long history here (which is probably the reason that I moderate the careers forum here). I had a very bumpy journy to becoming a very busy and mostly happy SAHM to two toddlers. When I first joined iMSN, I was commuting 1,000 miles to work every two weeks and some people cautioned me that I was too invested in my career. I thought they were crazy. And when they told me to take a step back from my career when my firm abruptly closed and I was 7.5mo pregnant with our second child, I thought they didn't understand. Now I understand that a job is a job.

[Cinderella]

boom-shock-ah-lock-ah

[moonlight]

Cinderella I think your job options are bigger than you give yourself credit for! Deep breath. You will get there and you will get it all figured out..... Then it will be time to move again. Haha! Hugs!!!

[reciprocity]

alotofyarn, sorry for the hijack. I am probably coming off as rather bitter about the whole career thing or at least as though I consider career to be disposable. There is a long history here (which is probably the reason that I moderate the careers forum here). I had a very bumpy journy to becoming a very busy and mostly happy SAHM to two toddlers. When I first joined iMSN, I was commuting 1,000 miles to work every two weeks and some people cautioned me that I was too invested in my career. I thought they were crazy. And when they told me to take a step back from my career when my firm abruptly closed and I was 7.5mo pregnant with our second child, I thought they didn't understand. Now I understand that a job is a job.

It's a very useful perspective. I'm likely to go through all this next year - up for partner and unless 2013 is terrible, I should get the offer in Dec of this year. Of course, we won't know if we're going to a city with a firm office at that time. Likely to be an awkward conversation...

Although I've resigned myself to taking the bar again.

[MrsK]

It's a very useful perspective. I'm likely to go through all this next year - up for partner and unless 2013 is terrible, I should get the offer in Dec of this year. Of course, we won't know if we're going to a city with a firm office at that time. Likely to be an awkward conversation...

Although I've resigned myself to taking the bar again.

That's pretty much how it happened for me. I was offered partnership and I blurted out the first thing that came to mind: "I'll have to discuss it with DrK." And my department head responded, "Ummmm, whose DrK?" followed by "Why haven't we met him?!" To his credit, DrK put on a suit and made the rounds, introduced himself to all of the senior partners in my office. By the time he met the managing partner there were all kinds of rumors circulating around the office: "He's 7' tall!" "They are getting married!" "She's pregnant!" We weren't yet engaged but he was about to finish medical school and The Match could take us who knows where. Fun doing the match with a dozen lawyers and their wives looking over your shoulder. We had many, many, many tearful conversations while we tried to negotiate The Match v. Law Firm Partnership. At the end of the day, it was a lot of misspent worry.

[MrsK]

Ultimately, we negotiated a Match contingency in my partnership agreement and a telecommuting option. However, at the end of the day, the Partnership was a liablity. It cost us money and teathered me to an out-of-state employer. Having the obligations of partnership without control or even knowledge about what was happening 1000 miles away was a bad situation. Without portable clients, the title did not enhance my marketability in a different State.

I hope your preparation for the match go well, and you get something right for you to to better gain and claim your rights in that partnership and for future correspondence also. It will will be nice to call for a legal help. Wish you best of luck.

[reciprocity]

Fortunately, J has met most of the partners that I've worked with, and many of them know about the match, but I always talk about it like "well, she wants to do neuro and UCSF has a great neuro program and we have an office in SF, so won't that be perfect!" Instead of "what are the odds of us opening a Cleveland office?"

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

It was definitely an awkward conversation for my company as well (I'm in boutique consulting). I had worked remotely for several years while DH was in med school but they all knew there were MANY good programs we could choose in NYC, Mass, or SF where we have offices. I am one promotion away from partner so I think they all expected me to come back but I encouraged DH to rank where he wanted and where we actually wanted to live (which didn't include NYC, Mass, or SF) and we matched away from my company. I think they know I'm never coming back to an office but we'll see if that prevents me from making partner. I have a while to go (I was just promoted) but we'll still be in residency when the conversation happens so I'm sure I'll get the inevitable "but you're coming back after residency, right?"

While I don't have to take the bar again, the majority of our clients are in NYC/Boston/SF so I have to work my butt off that much harder to get face time with clients as well as senior colleagues.

[alotofyarn]

I work with a lot of physicians, so most of them understand the match and knew it was a possibility that I'd leave when they hired me. For most of the last few years, I've tried to be really positive with my colleagues about the potential for us to match here, but my husband really didn't like the program for various reasons. When I started looking at other positions, I told people it was "just in case", but eventually I told my closer colleagues that staying here wasn't at the top of our list, and they've been really helpful in getting me connected elsewhere. I can still stay on as adjunct here and continue to collaborate with them, which helps the situation, I think.