career interfering with marriage

When I interviewed for a job, I explained how I switched majors in college from engineering to design. The VP that was conducting the interview wanted to know if my parents were disappointed when I made the switch. Um, excuse me? First of all, that's an inappopriate question, especially in an interview. And she's in the design field herself! AND, why does she care what my parents think? My point is that employers will ask anything they think they can get away with in interviews.

I have also been asked odd questions by job interviewers including:

1) do you have brothers or sisters (I get that constantly, not just from interviewers but from everyone. I can understand the question if you're in middle school, but at age 29?)

2) does you husband approve of your career change?

3) where did you meet your husband?

Crazy, huh?

[Vishenka69]

The good news is that if you move to a big city like NY or even Chicago, where doctors are a dime a dozen, employers don't really care what your husband does. My current boss actually likes the fact that DH is in medicine because I can work late and travel (plus he likes that I don't have any kids, but that's a separate tangent). Plus cities tend to be more expensive, so nobody is expecting dawkter's wife to quit because chances are her income will be necessary.

Personally, having been in a similar situation, I'd stick around unless it's absolutely unbearable. I don't know how large your company is but can you switch positions within the company or volunteer for a more interesting project? After the match, you'll still have 5 months to find a new job and the job market in NY is definitely picking up.

I think it relates to what Janet said -- I'm moving because of location change for my husband's career. An employer might reasonably wonder if your spouse's career will require another move that trumps your own location, dawkter or not.

Also, references may mention it -- "we're so sad to be losing her because of his residency/training", etc. I wouldn't come out with it but I can see how it is hard to disguise.

[Stella]

Since this is what I do, I can tell you that I've asked questions that I'm sure have seemed stranger than "Do you have siblings?" although that is actually a good one. I've asked...
How many taxis are there in the city of Richmond? (Who the hell knows, but it's important to see if/how they reason to find a guesstimate.)
Tell me about your best friend? What do you have in common? (You are who you hang with, basically.)

There are a lot of questions we ask as recruiters and they all lead to something else. Could your husbands career path be damaging to your chances? Possibly. I've had clients pass on candidates b/c they know their wife doesn't want to move from DC, even if the candidate "swears" that it will be fine. I don't think I've ever really asked to much about the spouses unless they bring it up first.

Anyway, I'd stay where you are and gain the experience (and security of time in a position as opposed to "job-hopping") on your resume. In the end, it'll be worth it even if it just effing sucks for a while. Good luck!