Wedding attire help!

[spotty_dog]

I have not been to very many weddings in my life, definitely none in the last 10 years or so. So I own zero special occasion clothing, and have zero experience deciding what to wear to something like this. So…help!

The wedding is in Baltimore over Labor Day weekend. We're told to expect temperatures in the 80s and I presume it will be humid. The ceremony is at 6pm. From what I know of the bride and her family, and based on the evening ceremony and east coast location, I'm thinking this will be a fairly fancy affair. However, the wedding website cautions us that all the wedding activities will take place outdoors with no air conditioning, and to dress accordingly.

I'm definitely going to wear flats. There will be a good bit of walking and I know I won't be comfortable in heels. (Can anyone recommend a brand or style of flat?) So, dress-wise, should I be looking for something long, or short? Solid, or patterned? Also, although I have some mild social anxiety, I happen to know that I feel much more comfortable when I wear something I've hand knit. So I'm going to cast on a simple lace shawl ASAP. I'm thinking I could do a neutral dress and blue shawl, or colorful dress and mottled/neutral shawl? Hopefully a small crescent shoulderette won't look too frumpy -- I've heard capelets are coming into fashion, and this will be sort of that kind of look.

I will probably just end up at Nordstrom and put myself in the hands of an assistant there, but I do want to have some idea of what I'm looking for before I take that journey.

DH is also unsure about how to dress. He owns one suit, but I think it doesn't fit him well these days, but he figures maybe with the weather it will be acceptable for him to skip the suit jacket altogether?

Any and all help is welcome! I'm such a fashion dolt. I don't mind dressing myself day-to-day in my own comfy funky style, but I do want to feel somewhat more pretty than dowdy for this.

[OrionGrad]

I think an assistant at Nordstrom should be able to help if you tell her all the details you just told us! Since you're not sure what style you want, it will probably be nice to try on a lot of different shapes and hem lengths.

I personally wouldn't dress too formal since the wedding will be hot and outside. (Nothing floor length or super shiny fabric.) I'd probably wear a nice summery dress with wedges and a small clutch. I'd also think your DH could probably skip the suit jacket if he wants since it's supposed to be humid. Then again, I think weddings on the west coast are a little more casual than on the east coast, so hopefully some of our east coasters will chime in!

[medpedspouse]

I had a wedding with similar temps. Totally depends on the formality of the venue. I went with an a line linen dress with wedges. I decided on maxi vs short because I am cold natured and wanted my legs covered if the temp dropped later in the evening. I wore a silk shawl for my shoulders and carried a clutch.

DH was going to wear a seersucker suit (his go to to hot temps) but heard several of the other guys were going more casual. So, he ended up with linen trousers and a silk/linen blend guayabera. Can you guys find out what some of the other guests will be wearing?

[spotty_dog]

I personally wouldn't dress too formal since the wedding will be hot and outside. (Nothing floor length or super shiny fabric.)

Thanks for being explicit. It's not like I've lived under a rock per se, but sometimes when it comes to these kinds of details, I'm as clueless as if I had.
[MENTION=980]medpedspouse[/MENTION], I think DH would go in Carhartt twill pants if he thought he could get away with it. We only really know one other couple who will be there, but I can check in with them. And the wife of that couple has a cool style and has lived east much more than I have, so she might be a good reference. Her husband is also a good bit more fashion-conscious than my DH.

[oceanchild]

I also think it'll be more formal being in an east coast city. I'd probably still wear a shorter dress though, since it's summer and outside. It sounds like the sort of thing to which DH would wear a shirt and tie but not a jacket. It's always hard to know for sure, but just remember - nobody's looking at what you're wearing!

[spotty_dog]

I remember being in DC last fall and being painfully aware of how much your personal fashion choices shape your image out there. People are serious about clothes back east! I am totally fine being my own off-beat West-coast self, but as long as I'm buying a dress for the event I want my look to be more intentionally eccentric than accidentally dowdy, LOL. So, I'm gathering that the idea will be summery, knee-length, more garden party than cocktail party? I think I can start putting some ideas together.

Actually…so, I have a Tommy Bahama silk dress that I have held on to. And…it fits me perfectly. HM. Well, that one is going in the mix. It would be very "me" to wear a 15-year-old dress, LOL. But it might also come in handy for the pre-wedding events and/or the nice dinner DH has promised me.

[medpedspouse]

Ummm - if it is a classic design, it is called a classic for a reason. I have clothes that I have been wearing for decades. My favorite compliment are on my riding boots....yep, bought them in 2001.

Back on topic - You are correct, (in the DC area at least) people do look at what you are wearing. If you love how you look in that silk dress, I would consider it appropriate. You will be comfortable in it for sure and wearing anything with confidence makes anyone look good. If you want an update, take it with you shopping and ask for something similar.

[spotty_dog]

It's similar to this one, but the print is turquoise floral on a navy background.

s-l225.jpg

I really like the fit and the fabric, but the floral might make it a bit too informal. I dunno. I bought it in Hawaii in 2001 for my BIL's wedding. I can't find a photo of me in it though...

[oceanchild]

I was saying that at a wedding people aren't really looking at what you're wearing. That's what the wedding party is for.

[medpedspouse]

Hmmm - The print does make it less formal. I would still take it with you or take a picture of yourself in it so that the stylist /shopper has some idea about what style of dress you prefer.

[spotty_dog]

I was saying that at a wedding people aren't really looking at what you're wearing. That's what the wedding party is for.

Oh, right, I totally got that, sorry if it sounded like I didn't. And it's a really good reminder for helping to calm my anxiety. It's the bride who matters!

[rufflesanddots]

In this situation I'd probably go with a black or jewel toned dress that was knee length but had an interesting neckline. Maybe some fancier earrings to jazz it up?

My only concern is sweating. :/ However, *everyone* will be sweating so it won't just be you. I went to a wedding last summer that had an outdoor ceremony and all the guests just laughed together when we stood and had sweat through our clothes. Luckily reception was indoor.

Are you close with someone (besides bride) who knows the vibe the bride and groom are going for? Could be that a pretty linen dress would be perfect!

Sent from my Nexus 6P using Tapatalk

[OrionGrad]

Or how about the venue? I'm pretty neurotic, so sometimes I'll Google the venue and lookup pictures of other events held there to see what people were wearing.

[spotty_dog]

Ooh, good one. It's a unique historic venue (so much that I don't want to name it lest *I* get Googled, LOL) so I bet locals will have come up with lots of ways to dress well with the limitations of being mostly outdoors.

[TulipsAndSunscreen]

Oh being from the area, now I'm really curious.

Question: is it on the water? Because depending when in September, it could be 5-10 degrees cooler than you expect.