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Specialty input

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  • Specialty input

    So I was wondering how much input you had in your spouses' specialty choice. I see lots of people wishing their spouse had done something else and I'm curious if they ever had a say in this. And if you did have a say, how did you research those specialties you were pulling for?

    I suppose I'm more stressed out than most, with my fiance applying as an FMG, but a week does not pass without me reading about a specialty and telling myself, "Hmm, he'd definitely get in, the pay is great, hours are decent. I wonder what it'll take to convince him that this is THE specialty for him."
    Cristina
    IM PGY-2

  • #2
    I met DH between 2nd and 3rd year. He was pretty much already on the surgery road, he just had to decide between Neuro and General. Still, neither of us truly understood what it would entail.

    Ironically, he started medical school with the thought of becoming an ObGyn. He like obstetrics, but not the Gyn part.

    Kelly
    In my dreams I run with the Kenyans.

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    • #3
      I chose option two although we both made the decision, however it really is the only one that makes him happy.
      Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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      • #4
        I choose the last one because I had very strong opinions about surgery. Luckily by the time he had to make a decision he wasn't into surgery either.

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        • #5
          I chose 'some.' We talked about them alot...and I NEVER thought he would choose ophthalmology. He really liked psychiatry, neurology and pain management...he's into the behavior aspect of all three....I thought for sure he'd end up in one of those...with neuropsych being my top thought. I pushed for Neuro fairly hard....his undergrad research was in neuro and he really liked the rotation and subject material. He ultimately chose what he wanted and completely blindsided me with the choice. I AM NOT COMPLAINING!! Ophtho is going to be good to us.
          Mom of 3, Veterinarian

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          • #6
            I would characterize my answer as "Some. My feelings were a large factor in his decision, but ultimately the choice was his."

            In his case he had pretty much ruled out surgery even before starting med school, largely because of his age, and nothing happened in med school to tempt him in that direction.

            Pathology was an early favorite for both of us, but in the end he struggled between Path and another specialty that is also considered family-friendly. I told him that I was absolutely onboard with either choice, but that I thought Path was the right choice for him and we went over the reasons why, talked about the pros and cons of both, etc.
            Married to a hematopathologist seven years out of training.
            Raising three girls, 11, 9, and 2.

            “That was the thing about the world: it wasn't that things were harder than you thought they were going to be, it was that they were hard in ways that you didn't expect.”
            Lev Grossman, The Magician King

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            • #7
              I voted some, although an option between the two somes would have been better suited. Dh had an idea of what he wanted to do. He loved doing procedures, and considered surgery or EM, but decided that more importantly he wanted a family life, so he chose anesthesia- best of both worlds- lots of procedures and gets to see the fam.

              Crystal
              Gas, and 4 kids

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              • #8
                We were dating when my husband did his peds rotation. He was so happy. Of course, he was doing his peds rotation in Hawaii so I am convinced that whatever random rotation he might have done in Hawaii would have been the 'dream job'. the Child Neurology thing kind of appeared out of nowhere but heck- at that point it really didn't matter.

                I knew that there was a nationwide shortageof child neurologists and that should he ever decide to do civilian medicine and even within the military, it can't hurt to be one of a few. (except when it comes to the call schedule!)

                Jenn

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                • #9
                  I chose 'some' because we talked about it, but I honestly didn't care what he did as long as he was happy doing it.
                  ~Jane

                  -Wife of urology attending.
                  -SAHM to three great kiddos (2 boys, 1 girl!)

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                  • #10
                    I chose #2 but we did talk quite a bit about what path within surgery would be best for him --- then us. We weren't engaged until the beginning of our R2 year.

                    He NEEDED to do surgery. General Surgery was a fit for him. He was going to do Ortho origionally -- but then changed his mind.

                    After we were on the General Surgery path, it became obvious that he wanted to do more training. He entertained Vascular for a short time as well as Pediatric Surgery and CT surg. CT surgery won because operating on the heart is "Nirvanna."

                    After we were stuck in General Surgery (hell ) it didn't seem like any of those choices was the stellar lifestyle choice so we just went with what DH liked best and crossed our fingers.
                    Flynn

                    Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

                    “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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                    • #11
                      I chose the last option, although I don't feel like it totally describes our situation. We talked about it a TON, but he wasn't indecisive. The final decision was his, and I just helped him talk it out, sometimes by playing devil's advocate.

                      DH was interested in primary care, but good at/interested in surgery, although the personalities he encountered during his rotations were off-putting enough that he was not interested in any kind of a surgery residency. He loved obstetrics from the first moment he experienced it, and the opportunity to do some surgery as well was icing on the cake. His final choice was between family practice and OB/Gyn, and it could be said that I encouraged him to choose OB. I knew he would not be happy as an FP handing off complicated deliveries to another specialty.....he is a "go the distance" type of guy.

                      Even though FP would have been a shorter and more pleasant residency, I am SO GLAD DH didn't go that way, due to the medical climate today. Also, as a FP doc in the military, he would have almost certainly been deployed, and even un-deployed would have been miserable in a military setting, due to the way FPs are utilized in the military.

                      Sally

                      Sally
                      Wife of an OB/Gyn, mom to three boys, middle school choir teacher.

                      "I don't know when Dad will be home."

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                      • #12
                        I voted for Some, we talked a little but it was mostly for me to be a sounding board as he hashed out what he wanted to do. I told him I'd even support him in a surgical specialty if that's where his passion lay, but I made sure he knew that would be a big challenge for me. Of course, then he did his surgery rotation and the idea of doing surgery was no longer even a hint of a threat.
                        Alison

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                        • #13
                          I voted none. Although we came up with going into medicne for DH together, he always wanted surgery. At first it was Ortho, then he changed his mind and went with General. Looking back now I would prefer if he wanted to do something like anes. due to lifestyle, but what it comes down to is him being happy with his career choice. He'll be doing it for a long while, so he needs to choose what he can feel good about and keep doing for a long time.
                          Wife to Hand Surgeon just out of training, mom to two lovely kittys and little boy, O, born in Sept 08.

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                          • #14
                            There has never been any question for us...he wanted ortho or nothing! I was a little naive about specialties and was confused when everyone would pat me on the back and just say something along the lines of good luck when they heard he was in ortho, now i get it! He loves it and wouldn't be happy doing anything else so what more could a gal want. (oh, ...........that well maybe someday when we get to sleep in the same bed )

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                            • #15
                              My DH could not decide. So, I suggested to do both. Hence, the Med Peds choice. Now, the fellowship was another story. THAT came out of nowhere. I had nothing to do with that. I thought we were done. :> But like others have said, he is doing something he loves.
                              Finally - we are finished with training! Hello real world!!

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