How do you handle?

I was wondering how you all handle it when friends ask your spouse for medical advice?
My dh is an ER Dr so people seem to think he
he has all the answers to medical questions . It upsets me when they
place him in that position. He handles it with grace.
Do you address it with them later or let it slide? There are two people in our
lives who do this all the time and removing them from our social circle isn't possible.
Any and all advice would be welcome.

[Flynn]

It really doesn't effect us that much to tell you the truth.

He has helped my mom but she didn't ask for his help -- she was misdiagnosed countless times and he stepped in. He's been asked for names "who would you see to do X." Other than that I think our circle of friends and family would just as soon NOT ask him because they don't want to be seen as "taking advantage" of his expertise.

I'd talk to the people -- steer then to a good Internal Medicine doc and have them direct all their questions to their OWN doctor. Tell them it's a personal conflict for him....

They have no right to make you both uncomfortable.

[pstone]

Have him look at them and give them 3 months to live, "EVERYTIME"

that should clear it up really quick.

Often humor, even the sick kind, will do the work for you.

[DCJenn]

We actually don't mind it because no one asks a child neurologist for advice unless they're seriously concerned about something. Now, back in the general peds days, if it was an adult, he'd look at them and say something like, "I'm sorry but you appear to be over 21..." 90% of the time in a joking manner.

Jenn

[SuzySunshine]

We don't get it a lot either probably for two reasons. One, no one hopes to have the need for a neurosurgeon and two most of our friends/family are also in the medical profession.

I asked DH to take a look at my grandfather on Christmas Day b/c my grandmother had cancelled an appointment with the neurologist that we all thought he needed. He was able to help in that situation but not usually.

I agree with the conflict idea, telling people that he could get in trouble for diagnosing outside the walls of his practice/hospital might work as well. People are so sue happy these days.

[Vishenka69]

DH doesn't usually get medical questions but mostly requests for recommendations. He doesn't seem to mind those. I tend to ask his friends lot of questions. But they usually just recommend a specialist, which is fine with me. Occassionally they'll call in prescriptions (nothing narcotic, just BCP and similar stuff).

[alison]

Most people don't know that an anesthesiologist is a doctor. His own patients will say "so when I see the doctor(they mean surgeon), I will tell them this or that."

[Momo]

My mom, sister and my mom's best friend, have all called on DH when they have been in the throws of cardiac tests. He is always happy to call the cardiologist on their behalf to discuss their cases. He is very nice about it, and it has lead to better relationship w/ their Dr.s'
One of their Dr.s, even tried to recruit them, to tell DH he should consider coming to IN to practice w/ them!! Since we do live so far away from the majority of those we know , we really don't get bothered much by it.

Most people don't know that an anesthesiologist is a doctor. His own patients will say "so when I see the doctor(they mean surgeon), I will tell them this or that."

Anesthesiologists are AWESOME people. Anyone who can get rid of pain =

This goes for my Dentist too, who got rid of HORRID pain from a bad tooth.

Gotta love these people!!! I really had no clue though that people wouldn't assume they were a doctor.

By saying you know he's in school still, right ? :dawkter:

Since you said he's been practicing for several years, I'd say he could tell them that they're really cracking down on this sort of thing at the hospital. Someone got sued based on advice they gave outside of the hospital, it's not covered under malpractice insurace, etc. Just say you're really taking all of this to heart, and you know they (your friends) wouldn't want him to risk his career so they can avoid a trip to their GP.

DH will give advice to some friends and family. Others that seem likely to abuse it, he says something along the lines of, "you should ask your internist about that." And if they don't have one, he suggests a couple.

A friend of mine is 7 months pregnant with twins and needed to see a dermatologist. I told her who I would go see. DH wished she had asked him to take a look to save her the trip to the doctor since she has so many ob appts to fit into her schedule but she didn't ask because she doesn't want to take advantage. He doesn't mind being helpful to people with that attitude.

Wasn't there a thread just like this a couple of weeks ago?

Anyway, people ask DH all the time. It's really annoying. I think the problem is his mom. She always volunteers DH and then she calls us non-stop to get him to come to her house and visit her guests. He never goes and she gets annoyed. Whatever.

I refuse to ask any of our friends for help unless it's an emergency. For instance, DH was extremely ill about a month ago, but I couldn't convince him to go to the ER. So I called a friend to come over and he forced DH to go to the ER. I don't even ask friends for Rxs. I don't even ask DH for Rxs! But that is mainly bc we have national healthcare here so if DH write the Rx, I have to pay full price, but if my PCP writes it, I pay 2 euro .

sorry for repeating a subject. I am brand new and was unaware. I will not repeat the mistake

sorry for repeating a subject. I am brand new and was unaware. I will not repeat the mistake

oh no! no apology necessary!!! how would you know??

just for future reference, you can always use the "search" function to see if there is something already out there on a topic - but that in no way prohibits making a post about it!