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med student spouses/partner

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  • med student spouses/partner

    What is your spouse/partner going into again?
    Some of you have it on your signature. Some, obviously don't know.

    If you don't know yet, what are they interested it?? Lists please!

    I'm curious, and for some reason when I picture "them" -- their speciality of choice goes a long way to telling me "what they are like!"

    DH and I play a game with eachother....when I meet a new doc here we make sure I don't know their speciality. I find DH (usually this is at a social gathering) after I've talked to them and guess. So far I'm 4 for 6!! Not bad! (...and the two I got wrong I was right about the general speciality...kids, ob gyn, medicine...but not the SPECIFIC speciality.) It's much harder here to pin point the speciality. At the University it was SOOOO easy. People just project what they have gone into.
    Flynn

    Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

    “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

  • #2
    EM - only 15 days till graduation!

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    • #3
      It's in my sig - my DH is almost done training in EM. But, his personality isn't in my sig.
      He has definite ADD - when you talk to him, he'll jump to about 15 different topics before coming back to the first (and you're expected to know what he's talking about), all in about 10 minutes.
      Total adreneline junky. A great day for him is a really bad day for someone else (it sounds terrible, but it's true).
      Completely passionate about what he does. Loves to talk about work and hard to shut up about medicine.
      Loves to have a messy house, but somehow knows where everything is. It's this bizarre multitasking that makes him good at his job.
      Work is his social life. I actually have to remind him to call his friends who don't work in the medical field. It's not that he doesn't like them, he just seems to forget they exist.
      Former firefighter/paramedic. Anyone who knows a fire/medic in the Chicago area and an EP will notice that the personalities of the two professions (at least in that region) are very similar.
      We had two friends in medical school with very similar personalities that went into different specialties. Both are going back to training in EM. Once they had some experience in the Emergency Department, they couldn't stay away. DH and I call it being "bit."

      ps - I had to edit my post - Just because DH loves living in a messy house, our house isn't messy. I just have to work extra hard to pick it up!
      -Deb
      Wife to EP, just trying to keep up with my FOUR busy kids!

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      • #4
        Originally posted by Deebs
        It's in my sig - my DH is almost done training in EM. But, his personality isn't in my sig.
        He has definite ADD - when you talk to him, he'll jump to about 15 different topics before coming back to the first (and you're expected to know what he's talking about), all in about 10 minutes.
        Total adreneline junky. A great day for him is a really bad day for someone else (it sounds terrible, but it's true).
        Completely passionate about what he does. Loves to talk about work and hard to shut up about medicine.
        Loves to have a messy house, but somehow knows where everything is. It's this bizarre multitasking that makes him good at his job.
        Work is his social life. I actually have to remind him to call his friends who don't work in the medical field. It's not that he doesn't like them, he just seems to forget they exist.
        Former firefighter/paramedic. Anyone who knows a fire/medic in the Chicago area and an EP will notice that the personalities of the two professions (at least in that region) are very similar.
        We had two friends in medical school with very similar personalities that went into different specialties. Both are going back to training in EM. Once they had some experience in the Emergency Department, they couldn't stay away. DH and I call it being "bit."

        ps - I had to edit my post - Just because DH loves living in a messy house, our house isn't messy. I just have to work extra hard to pick it up!
        I think EM is one of the most difficult to pinpoint. The people who go into this area really vary.
        Flynn

        Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

        “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

        Comment


        • #5
          You know my DH and I'd hope you think he is not the typical nsurg - yes, he's definitely a surgeon but not the sterotypical cocky self centered neurosurgeon.

          (And I can vouch for Deb's husband you should try having dinner with them)
          Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.

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          • #6
            Originally posted by Suzy Sunshine
            You know my DH and I'd hope you think he is not the typical nsurg - yes, he's definitely a surgeon but not the sterotypical cocky self centered neurosurgeon.

            (And I can vouch for Deb's husband you should try having dinner with them)
            Cheri -- Neurosurgery would have been in my top two for your DH!!!!!!!! Of course he is absolutely NOT arrogant or cocky but very confidant and "bookish." In DH's program that's what the brain docs were like.
            Flynn

            Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

            “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

            Comment


            • #7
              I would never peg Cheri's husband for a surgeon (other than I knew what he was going into the first time I met him). He obviously LOVES neurosurg, but he doesn't "fit" the other neurosurgeons we know.

              Flynn, the more Emergency docs you get to know, you'll realize they're a variation on a theme. Look for the ADD - it's the most sure-fire sign. Obviously, they don't all have ADD, but the ones that don't almost start to pick up characteristics of it, like flitting from one topic to another in conversation. It's weird.
              -Deb
              Wife to EP, just trying to keep up with my FOUR busy kids!

              Comment


              • #8
                I like to guess specialties, too. I am pretty good about getting them right, as well. I remember when DH was interviewing for residency we ran into an old high school friend in the northeast. When high school friend's spouse( also a resident, herself) met DH, she immediately agreed that anesthesiology was the perfect fit for DH. DH and I were like, what, how does she know? How can you just tell? Well, after 2 years of residency, both DH and I can guess, too.

                So, DH is obviously in Anesthesiology. Almost chose Medicine, but changed at the last minute. Says he thanks his lucky stars everyday, that he didn't do Medicine.

                Comment


                • #9
                  My DH is a NSG, too, and he also generally doesn't fit the "stereotype" (which seems to be that a NSG is overbearing, intolerant, impatient, overly aggressive, multi-divorced and/or womanizer, etc.). But to be honest, I know only one or two NSGs that seem to fit this stereotype anyway, and none are residents in his program. There also is this stereotype that all NSGs have been totally "hard core" about NSG since birth--that's all they ever wanted. That's not universally true at all: while some NSGs are definitely like that (they knew in high school that's what they wanted to do), a lot more--including my DH--seriously considered other specialities. In fact, a lot of NSGs I know actually considered/did other careers before medical school. Everything from business to politics to music to nursing. In the end though, I think for most NSGs, there something about the speciality that is so deeply compelling that, while they could do some other speciality and be reasonably happy, it just wouldn't be the same as NSG. Honestly, as a nonmedical spouse, there are times where I feel like I'll never know a really important part of who he is, because, while I can appreciate what he does, I can't really be a part of that world and share in that passion.

                  While I think it's fair to say that while all the NSGs I've met, including my DH, have the requisite self-confidence (sometimes mistaken for arrogance) and assertiveness, and a pretty jaded view on human nature, they are not jerks--they are just extremely overworked, underfed, and sleep-deprived. It takes a toll on their ability to be diplomatic and thoughtful and cripples social skills. But, then, I'd be ready to put someone through a wall if I hadn't slept in 40 hours, too.

                  My DH does share in common that little bit of adreneline junkie-dom that a lot of the NSGs seem to have. They often like to drive fast, ride Harleys, skydive, adventure-vacation, etc. I guess if you see the stuff they see all day long, life seems pretty random--you rationalize that you could just as easily die from walking across the intersection than racing through the street on a motorcyle. But, on the other hand, he's a nut about safety with our kiddo. Sometimes I have to tell him to relax.

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                  • #10
                    I agree. EM is hard to pinpoint. I met a guy who was wearing a UW shirt (Flynn!!!), and mentioned that I had gone to the same place for college. I asked what he was doing in Chicago (he was not in a touristy section of Chicago), and he said he was doing his residency. He had big muscles (orthopod?), was wearing his UW t-shirt (ortho again?), but was out at an unhealthy local dive (Anesthesiology, Radiology?). Nope, EM!
                    married to an anesthesia attending

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                    • #11
                      My SO is going into general surgery and wants to specialize in plastics- doing mostly reconstructive breast surgeries.

                      I'm not really sure what the stereotype for his specialty is? All I've heard is vanity. I actually asked him if he was vain, one day. He was offended.

                      He's really good natured, he's veeeerrrry humble, doesn't think he's above average. His biggest failure in life would be to not use his gifts that God gave him to help other people (his words) hence the interest in reconstructive surgery. The women he'll be working with will be recovering and getting better, so he'll be able to enhance their self esteem and bring back a significant part of them they lost in the cancer process. He thinks it's a big deal, what makes a woman a woman.

                      He does really care about his health and fitness, and appearance (he'll never, ever wear comfty pants out in public), and he takes boatloads of vitamins. He drinks smoothies and protein shakes and eats SUPER healthy.

                      Ok, analyze my SO please, does he fit the stereotype? And what is it anyway? :huh:

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                      • #12
                        Originally posted by alison
                        He had big muscles (orthopod?)
                        :funnycry: :funnycry: :funnycry:

                        OMG, STOP!!
                        Heidi, PA-S1 - wife to an orthopaedic surgeon, mom to Ryan, 17, and Alexia, 11.


                        Comment


                        • #13
                          Originally posted by Vanquisher
                          Originally posted by alison
                          He had big muscles (orthopod?)
                          :funnycry: :funnycry: :funnycry:

                          OMG, STOP!!
                          I thought you'd get a kick out of it, Heidi. No, seriously, my dh worked at children's hospital and he said the orthopods all had these huge muscles with barbwire tatoos going around their arms.
                          married to an anesthesia attending

                          Comment


                          • #14
                            Originally posted by Deebs
                            Flynn, the more Emergency docs you get to know, you'll realize they're a variation on a theme. Look for the ADD - it's the most sure-fire sign. Obviously, they don't all have ADD, but the ones that don't almost start to pick up characteristics of it, like flitting from one topic to another in conversation. It's weird.
                            I never knew about this association with EM but my DH is terrible at this, it's very frustrating when I want a good deep conversation!! I guess it means he is well matched then.

                            Comment


                            • #15
                              Oh, we're sappose to give info on personality, sorry skimmed to fast

                              DH:

                              One word describes DH to a tee - THOROUGH !!! He will do all he has to to make sure he is completely understanding the material, work more to further his understanding, always taking that extra step. He's pretty balanced, but like for anyone it can be difficult. He has high energy IMO, I crash hours before he does. Also he loves to figure things out (including working on cars, doing anything mechanical, doing any handyman stuff). And his humor is on the warped side - goes right along with mine

                              And he is mr outdoor man - loves to hike till his feet bleed - literally

                              He has definite ADD - when you talk to him, he'll jump to about 15 different topics before coming back to the first (and you're expected to know what he's talking about), all in about 10 minutes.
                              this is me, guess being married to me seals the package huh?

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