Nesting instinct gone arry?

HI everyone...

So, I have posted a couple threads over the past several months venting my life frustrations and major stresses. You all have helped SO much that I thought I would hit you with one more, still related to all the other drama...and hopefully the LAST time I consult you all with your opinions.

To reiterate...

DH just started his TY residency here in the lovely La Crosse, WI on June 27th. (We are moving from Buffalo, NY and have had some major ordeals over the past few weeks dealing with this move and yada yada yada). Our moving company picked up our stuff from Buffalo June 21st and guess when it finally arrived in La Crosse?? JULY 4th (the day our FIRST child was DUE TO BE BORN). Anyhow, not to complain because at least it arrived.

Now my problem is our house is a disaster zone!!!! Boxes everywhere, and none of which I can move around to put away. (See previous posting where I have mentioned that my DH is a BOOK FANATIC--we had over 800 lbs. of books that were moved) We have moved into these amazing, on-campus, housing units that could be furnished or not. We had to let the manager know prior to moving in what furniture we wanted or wanted to be removed. SO, I said...we will take everything EXCEPT we will bring our own bed so please remove the bed from the master bedroom. Well, needless to say...that particular bed (box springs, mattress head board) is completely blocking my access to the "baby room" so I cannot get anything organized or put in its place. And our bedroom is filled with boxes and all my clothes (which I cannot put away because I was going to use the closet in the baby room!)

So, basically this is where I stand. I cannot put away any baby things, I can't find a space in my room for the bassinet (not that DH has it put together yet anyhow!!), I can't walk around my living room because there are boxes EVERYWHERE!! And my baby could come at any minute.

Why oh why can't I just nest in peace like a normal person!!! After all this craziness, I finally had a major emotional break down last night. DH is totally confused as to why I am crying so hard that I can't breathe. He says "I don't know what YOU have to worry about. I am the one who is stressed with starting residency....I will put the bassinet and stroller together and put the house away." But he is working all weekend!!

Am I nuts? Could I be over-reacting?? Is it right for me to feel completely guilty over the fact that I am going to be bringing my little baby home to a place where I cannot place him down to sleep or to change his diaper? I just have such bad mixed emotions, the strongest one being jealously over all the tons of women out there who are able to focus 100% of their minds on giving birth, recovering and taking care of the baby. I know how important it is to be emotionally strong to give birth, and here I am breaking down big time. I can't stop crying and I am scared to death!!

Anyhow, I just wanted to see if you all think I am nuts or is this just my nesting instinct being interferred with that is making me have a melt down.

You're not nuts. There is no such thing as overreacting when you're 9+ months pregnant. Call the housing mgr and explain that you are 9 months pregnant, you requested that the bed not be there and you cannot get the baby room set up for the baby that is due to come out at any moment. They'll usually respond to the preggo.

As for your dh ... he's lucky he still has the ability to reproduce after saying "I don't know what YOU'RE stressed about." I would have removed his testicles.

And for your home: pick a tiny corner, and get it set up the way you want. The rest will eventually fall into place. Just get the bassinet set up, and clear a space on the couch. Newborns are tiny and don't take up lots of space.

And breathe.

[houseelf]

Ummm...don't minimize what you are going through. You are going through so many transitions all at once. Even good change can be stressful. Are people coming after baby boy is born to help? If so, don't hesitate to ask them to pitch in.

After the major stuff was in our house, I am giving myself an hour a day this summer to go through the boxes each day. I don't want to miss out on summer...and you will never be a first time parent again.

Thinking of you.

Kelly

[rainbabies]

You're not nuts. There is no such thing as overreacting when you're 9+ months pregnant. Call the housing mgr and explain that you are 9 months pregnant, you requested that the bed not be there and you cannot get the baby room set up for the baby that is due to come out at any moment. They'll usually respond to the preggo.

As for your dh ... he's lucky he still has the ability to reproduce after saying "I don't know what YOU'RE stressed about." I would have removed his testicles.

And for your home: pick a tiny corner, and get it set up the way you want. The rest will eventually fall into place. Just get the bassinet set up, and clear a space on the couch. Newborns are tiny and don't take up lots of space.

And breathe.

ditto what jenn said.

[Momo]

And for your home: pick a tiny corner, and get it set up the way you want. The rest will eventually fall into place. Just get the bassinet set up, and clear a space on the couch. Newborns are tiny and don't take up lots of space

.

She's right about this!
We moved 4 weeks before DS1 was born. I remember the baby and I sleeping on a double mattress & box springs that were on the floor in the guest room. I had a snuggle nest & a bassinet. In the bottom compartment of the bassinet I had a changing pad,diapers, wipes, neosporin(for his circ), burp cloths, layette gowns , and extra blankies. I changed him in the bed between my legs, and I breast fed. I kept the bassinet parked next to the "bed" so I could have easy access to the contents. For the first 2 weeks I lived 90% of my time in that little area. DH would bring my meals. Trust me that's all you need is a little, cozy& quiet space. After a week or so you'll be ready to do things...it will all work out :therethere: :babyboy:

Trust me, you're handling this beeeyoootifully!!!!

Your are under some major stress and you are due a good cry or three!

It is absolutely true that when the baby comes home, you'll be much less concerned about the house. It will when get done whenever it gets done... You won't be able to take your eyes off that baby.

I wish I were there, I'd come over and help you unpack.

Hang in there!

[Momo]

I wish I were there, I'd come over and help you unpack.

Same here...too bad there isn't an iMSN-er near by...if ever there was a need for one of us to help out, this would definitely qualify!

[Flynn]

You're not nuts. There is no such thing as overreacting when you're 9+ months pregnant. Call the housing mgr and explain that you are 9 months pregnant, you requested that the bed not be there and you cannot get the baby room set up for the baby that is due to come out at any moment. They'll usually respond to the preggo.

As for your dh ... he's lucky he still has the ability to reproduce after saying "I don't know what YOU'RE stressed about." I would have removed his testicles.

And for your home: pick a tiny corner, and get it set up the way you want. The rest will eventually fall into place. Just get the bassinet set up, and clear a space on the couch. Newborns are tiny and don't take up lots of space.

And breathe.

ditto what jenn said.

Ditto ditto. (especially the testicles part... )

~EXHALE~

Thanks for the words.

I just needed a little reinforcement to make sure I wasn't just being completely nutso. But you are all right!! We just need a little nook to ourselves and everything else will be alright. I can do that.

Help is on the way! My folks are coming the week after he is born (hmm...will he arrive tomorrow 7/7/07??) so I am pretty sure they can be helpful.

And DH doesn't mean to sound totally insensitive. He is also WAY overly stressed right now... but he also shouldn't blow off my emotions about this. Maybe he forgot that I am going to be the one going through LABOR!!!!

I totally understand your stress. It's hard to wrap your brain around "plan B" when you had a different dream for how your baby would come into the world.

I was on bed-rest for my entire pregnancy. That meant that other people got to pick out the receiving blankets, the bedding, the very first outfits that my babies would wear, other people got to put together the nursery. Letting that dream go was very, very hard. So instead I focused on my one job: keeping the boys alive and inside of me for as long as I could.

I wholeheartedly agree with the advice others gave you. Create a little niche for you and the baby. Put up a scenic picture nearby where you can 'escape' when you need something else to look at besides a messy house. The only things your new little tiger will care about is being snuggled, kept dry and an unlimited supply of milk.

And write everything down. Someday you may have to comfort a new mom who has to 'settle' for plan "B". It's not really "settling",
it's re-focusing.

[SuzySunshine]

Oh, Amy I was off yesterday you should have called me!