feuding sister in laws

Just a tip:
It's not a good idea to listen to feuding sister in laws on what each one says the other has said about you over the years. It was a tough day and although I have tried to stay clear, I now must seriously bow out of their mess.

All alone tonight because he's working and the kids are at grandma and grandpa's. I'm lonely and sad.

-m

[planet]

:therethere:

I'm so sorry you were in that position. BTDT unfortunately. Nothing sucks more than having someone hurt you just to forward their own agenda. Good move in bowing out.

[Momo]

What a couple of biddys...f'em you deserve better than their pettiness!

[DCJenn]

and besides, if they're that petty, who is to say that either of them said anything!

I'm w/ suz- f'em.

Jenn

Thanks for the support.

It hurts because it was so vile, cut so close to what matters to me and is so personal - about my birthing of my kids, breast feeding, parenting...

and yikes.... ready for this? my housekeeping!

[DCJenn]

hmmm, let's pick the things that will likely piss of ANY woman-

childbirth (or lackthereof)
breastfeeding (or lackthereof)
and housekeeping.

I say you invite them both over, pop some popcorn, install a video feed so we can all watch and just sit back.

Jenn

I say you invite them both over, pop some popcorn, install a video feed so we can all watch and just sit back.

Jenn

Oh yes, that would be a very ugly scene!

[planet]

Just realize that if it was the words of one SIL telling you what the other SIL said about you, then the comments were made to piss you off and hurt you so you would get mad at said SIL. meanwhile the comments may be taken completely out of context or, if true, were never meant for you to hear, and likely were said over the course of however many years you have known them. Bundle them together though and they pack a punch, no doubt. I understand it hurts. But it was meant to hurt. It reflects worse on the one who told you than the one who allegedly said, IMHO.

She sure did hit the sore spots didn't she??!

I understand it hurts. But it was meant to hurt. It reflects worse on the one who told you than the one who allegedly said, IMHO.

She sure did hit the sore spots didn't she??!

Yes, you're right. My sensible, reasonable, and good natured husband feels the same way. He also thinks the worst thing is letting what they say get to me. He's encouraging me that I've been nothing but a good mom and should know that and not worry about what they have or have not said.

Neither of them can really be the good guy now whichever way you look at it. Both have given me this treatment now - telling me what the other allegedly said. So they both have been the teller and the one being told on.

I don't know if they are trying to win me over to their "side" or just trying to drag me in and hurt me. I think it's the first - but if the later is the case, this is much sicker than I ever thought. I know it would be very dangerous for me to respond to or pursue these issues with them or other siblings or their parents.

Of course, their feud is not about me at all and there are many more serious accusations between the two of them - and many of these are directly contradictory. They have a big family, and it always seemed like everyone got along so well. I guess not.

So far, their sensible brother (my dh) has been left out of it. Since he's had success with his tactics, I think I'll follow suit. I will also be guarded, though. I do not feel like trusting again.

Time to sleep now.

-m

Of course, their feud is not about me at all and there are many more serious accusations between the two of them - and many of these are directly contradictory. They have a big family, and it always seemed like everyone got along so well. I guess not.

So far, their sensible brother (my dh) has been left out of it. Since he's had success with his tactics, I think I'll follow suit. I will also be guarded, though. I do not feel like trusting again.

I hate conflict like this. There can be no "winner." And the two selfish people who are having the conflict don't care that others are getting hurt by it. I'm so sorry. Maybe now you've seen their true nature. It almost sounds as if they are jealous of you.

I'm with you, be guarded and don't get drawn into their nasty games.

[SuzySunshine]

Ugg - hang in there! I think they probably are trying to suck you in since you say your DH stays out of it.

I'm so glad DH doesn't have sisters.

Thanks again everyone for responding. It helps.

Also, a good night's sleep helped.

Looking over my post, I wanted to add how vile the comments were about my childbirth, breastfeeding etc. - - - supposedly making fun of me during my labor and calling various things disgusting. Bad Bad Bad.

Not sure if I want to see one of them at a family gathering this weekend...

dh is home this morning from his shift and since the kids spent the night with grandparents, we got to go out to breakfast together! Now he's sleeping, so I'm going to the Art Institute to see an exhibition I've been wanting to see.

-m

[madeintaiwan]

So sorry about the ILs. Glad you could spend some time with DH and hope you enjoyed your outing.

[diggitydot]

Just another reason why I'm glad my SIL is only 10 years old. You expect a 10 y/o to act immature...

[planet]

Just another reason why I'm glad my SIL is only 10 years old. You expect a 10 y/o to act immature...

I suppose this is one time I should be grateful that dh is an only child.