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I have been doing a lot of article reading online about what challenges to expect in the upcoming years through his training and the types of stress as a couple we will encounter; but I was wondering if there are any books that any of you ladies can recommend regarding being a doctor's wife or anything similar?
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Living the Life of Intern Year...
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Ummmm ... Kris wrote a book called "Surviving Residency" that is featured on the front page and in her tag line (PrincessFiona). -
I'll second that suggestion -- you can get Kris' book on amazon.com.Comment
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Her book is spot on fantabulous.Luanne
wife, mother, nurse practitioner
"You have not converted a man because you have silenced him." (John, Viscount Morely, On Compromise, 1874)Comment
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Me too! It's a really good source of information, and she has some good real-life examples.Laurie
My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)Comment
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After you read Kris' book... you may want to give this one a try, I've heard good things (and am actually waiting to get it from our library).
Loving wife of neurosurgeon 
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I just finished Kris' book last week and started The Medical Marriage this week.
A friend of mine, a peds intern who is engaged to an ortho intern, is reading The Five Love Languages. She said it's been really helpful..Comment
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I read The Medical Marriage during MS1 and cried myself to sleep every night. It was BLEAK and TERRIFYING. And maybe accurate, too...., but it was just too much for me to handle during my first few months of marriage. It robbed me of any joy I had in thinking about our future. The book presented all these stressors and conundrums but offered no solutions. I'd try to work out solutions in conversation with DH, but conversation quickly devloved into OMG PANIC about my career and his happiness and our future children. It was ugly. We eventually came to an agreement that I couldn't get angry about things he had not yet done wrong. I'm glad to be vaguely aware of the challenges, but I have to take it one step at a time and trust that we'll find a solution to cross each bridge when we come to it.
Long way of saying, no more such books for me.Comment
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Thanks for recommending Surviving Residency, guys!
Selu, I had a similar reaction to The Medical Marriage when I read it many years ago. It is one of the reasons that I really tried to make surviving residency more solutions oriented.
I was supposed to get my corrections in for the 2nd edition months ago but I've been too busy with the kids. Maybe when school starts! LOL If I had any more copies laying around, I'd send them to both of you...but I gave them all away. Once I get around to finishing things up for the 2nd printing I'd be happy to send a couple of free ones your way...it just might take a few months.
Kris~Mom of 5, married to an ID doc
~A Rolling Stone Gathers No MossComment
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Originally posted by PrincessFiona View Post
Really? I LIKE solutions. Knowing that really makes me want to read your book! Off to Amazon....Comment
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Originally posted by PrincessFiona View Post
Thanks Kris! Money is really tight right now and the library here doesn't carry your book or the other one suggested. If you happen to have any extras in the future I would love to have a copy signed by the author!
I may end up just breaking down and buying both at some point. We will see.
Thank you everyone for the suggestions!!!!Living the Life of Intern Year...Comment
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I might get boo'ed off the stage for suggesting this, but I read "The Proper Care and Feeding of Husbands" by Dr. Laura Schlessinger (yeah, that Dr. Laura). It's really geared more towards SAHMs, but there's some good advice and stories about how to handle husbands who have demanding jobs.Laurie
My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)Comment
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Ugh... I read that book and I HATED IT!!! I think 90% of her concepts are absolutely ridiculous. Men are simple and as long as you take care of the home, don't nag them, and give them sex whenever they want it, they'll be putty in your hands. Oh and smile and act "as if" and you'll have a happy husband ready to please you. WHATEVER!!! I am a SAHM and I was ENRAGED the entire time I was reading the book. I am getting HOT just thinking about it. Sorry, I was apparently raised differently and I am pretty much everything that is wrong with today's women according to Dr. Laura. She can bite me. And I really don't like how she criticizes women who work outside of the home. My mother was of those women and I didn't turn out f'ed up like she describes our generation of women and mothers. Sorry, I am SAHM of 3, don't have any family around to distract me from my wifely duties, I'm not overbooked with outside activities, and I do practically everything for my PGY3 ortho surgery husband and he is definitely not "putty" in my hands like Dr. Laura claims he should be.Originally posted by ladymoreta View PostComment
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My MIL reads and listens to Dr. Laura CONSTANTLY maybe that is why she and I don't get along sometimes
Dr. Laura drives me NUTS!Wife to NSG out of training, mom to 2, 10 & 8, and a beagle with wings.Comment
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I don't disagree with you about her attitude towards our generation, and she can come across as very condescending. My mom also worked outside of the home, and my sister and I turned out just fine, and she and my dad still have a healthy, loving marriage. That's why I was hesitant to suggest it, but I think some of her suggestions help me at times when DH is post-call and grumpy. I don't know, I guess I just kind of had a "take it and leave it" approach when I read the book - I knew going into it that some of it would be unhelpful/offensive, so I just ignored those parts. *shrug*Laurie
My team: DH (anesthesiologist), DS (9), DD (8)Comment
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