Do they REALLY expect me to raise my family on $1200/month?

Okay, so I am accepted to med school with less than 6 weeks to make all the neccessary arrangements, and I am trying to figure out all the financing. From what I understand so far, the school budgets $1200 per month for living expenses, and that I can't borrow more than that. I have one beautiful wife, one daughter turning 5 on the 14th, we are having a baby on the 6th, and I have to start classes on the 21st.

I am desperately hoping that there are ways to borrow more than the specified budget.

If anyone can put my mind at ease, I would be greatly appreciative.

thanks,

Matt

[Rapunzel]

Hi, Matt. My husband began medical school with a wife and baby boy. We had twin daughters at the end of 2nd year in med school and then our fourth child during intern year of residency. I freaked out myself when I realized just how little we would have to live off of during medical school. So, let me give you some options to consider - some of them my husband and I have tried, others have been done by our friends:

-Consider a scholarship such as a rural or military medical scholarship. These require a time commitment after residency (and with the military it will influence your specialty and where you serve for residency) but you do receive an additional stipend per month of $1,000+. That amount can be crucial to surviving with a family during medical school.

-Is your wife interested in working part time or working from your home? I have a friend with a degree in early childhood development and years of dancing experience. She put this to use while her husband was in med school (they had two little daughters at that time) by giving dance classes for toddlers and preschoolers in her home.

-Consider your wife and children going on Medicaid during your time in school. With your income they will definitely qualify and you will at least have that insurance in case a medical problem arises. Trust me, ALWAYS stay covered medically!!! During medical school our son had three neurosurgeries, countless MRIs and CTscans, I had a horribly complicated twin pregnancy, and our twins ended up in the NICU for two weeks! Our bills before insurance and ultimately Medicaid would have been in the six figures!

-If you have parents or relatives that *might* be willing to help you out financially NOW is the time to talk to them about it. I suggest any agreement you make regarding money and relatives be WRITTEN DOWN and signed by both parties so as to avoid future misunderstandings.

That's all I have at the moment! I really do understand your situation and if I think of anything else I'll post it!

Jennifer

[PrincessFiona]

money, money, money

Matt,

I'd suggest that you call/go in person and talk to the people in your financial aid office. They will be able to tweek the numbers for you guys. In addition, they will turn you on to some private loans that you can get. Check out the Access Group loan website: http://www.accessgroup.org/

They financed a lot of my MS. These loans aren't as easily deferred though because they aren't federal, but should be fine as long as you are in school. They might work with you during residency as well.

Let us know what you find out....and send your wife over here

kris

Hi Matt,
I don't know a whole lot about this since we only took out loans for tuition and not for living expenses. My husband had a few thoughts, though.

--Definitely talk to the financial aid office. In person if you can.
--DH thought that extra living expenses were granted when you have childcare expenses. If this applies to you in any way, I would bring it up with the financial aid people.
--We recall that sometimes the school had "discretionary" funds when they had leftover financial aid dollars. We don't remember if this meant that people could get more for living expenses or if it changed the subsidized/unsubsidized ratio of the loans. I do remember that if they had leftover subsidized loans and a student was eligible, they could increase that amount and decrease your unsub loans. (Unfortunately we didn't get much subsidized )
-- We did get some subsidized loan dollars when our daughter was born. Somehow that changed our ability to get those loans. So be sure they know when your baby arrives.

Good luck!

[Rapunzel]

Our experience with first going to the financial aid office at my husband's medical school was very poor. They essentially said they wouldn't give us more loan money because we might "go buy a sports car". No joke. That is precisely what the woman in charge of financial aid told me! To make matters worse, this woman was, herself, a wife to a physician and had been married to him during his training years - so it wasn't like she was ignorant of our situation! She then went on to comment that they weren't giving more loan money to a medical student who was divorced and had to pay child support so why should we get anymore money? She said all of this during a meeting immediately before first year med school during which I was holding my baby boy the entire time.

It is true that you can get more financial aid with children - but only if you pay other people to watch your children. Our program would not give us any more money for our children's expenses if I was the one taking care of them. Go figure. Otherwise our program told us that they couldn't treat the medical students differently "just because" they had families. So, beware - if your program was like ours you will get absolutely nowhere with them.

Thankyou all for your kind replies. I get the impression that this website is the home of a tight knit and supportive community; I am sure that we will learn to love all of you before this is over.

I talked to financial aid before I read these replies, and they said that a student budget adjustment could be approved by committee once I get there. I will have to save all my reciepts for a month, and they should be able to help me borrow more. **Sigh-of-Relief**

Regards,

Matt

We were in a very similar situation. We had three children when we started med school. It can be done so don't panic. Definitely go to the financial department and see what they can do. We did get a little money added on for housing and we were able to get private loans that weren't bad on interest. We are in residency now and these loans are all in deferrment. I stayed at home and babysat one little girl all four years of med school. The last two years I was able to work at home doing medical transcription, which helped some.

We started off with Blue Cross insurance but the monthly premiums were so high we couldn't keep up the payments. We then did Medicaid and it saved us. My husband got the school insurance. We also did the WIC program, which helped with food expenses, especially formula when you hit that stage.

The money will be tight but you can make it work. The financial office at our school was very helpful and helped us find additional funds. I hope you have the same experience with that.

Good luck with the start of your new adventure.

Robin

[PrincessFiona]

financial aid

Maybe it depends on the school? I had a great experience at UF through the college of medicine when I was doing my MS. I had to go through the med school financial aid office and I actually turned down some of the money because I knew we'd have to pay it back.

kris

[Rapunzel]

I really think you are correct, Kris, in that various school's financial aid departments handle these things in their own particular ways. Just as an aside the med school my husband attended was UT Southwestern. And let me add their administration is definitely NOT very accommodating should you have life-or-death family emergencies occur. For instance, when I was rushed into emergency labor with toxemia at 34-35 weeks gestation (twins rushed to NICU, one of them had a fairly low chance of survival) my husband was not given even a tiny bit of leniency with his schedule. I have to admit being a bit bitter about that school.

Hi Matt
Our experience with the financial aid in Med school was very poor as well. What resulted was my having to work 40 hours a week while a relative was nice enough to stay with my children which were both very young at the time. We did not want to go the medicaid route because I knew I could get better coverage for myself and my children and better doctors for their care. Four years of work for your wife would fly by and certainly help with money.

Wow. They sure don't make it easy. I spoke with financial aid this morning and there IS a $200/week child care allowance--BUT it is only available if I pay someone ELSE to watch my kids. So, it looks like I'll be stuck with $1300 dollars as part of the normal student budget. There might be some meager budget adjustment, but I won't find out the magnitude untill I've been there SIX WEEKS; furthermore, when i suggested to the financial aid lady that we need about $2000/month to make ends meet, she replied in complete amazement that she had never heard of anyone getting that much aid. Sheesh. The only way I can see us making ends meet is if my wife works, but since she will be delivering our second child on July 6th, I fear she will be unable to sustain gainful employment in the near future. Besides, I would much rather have her raise my kids, than pay a stranger to do the job.

This has been a real roller coaster ride, with us thinking we have funding one minute, and our hopes being dashed on the rocks the next. Thanks again for all your great anecdotes and advice.

Warm Regards,

Matthew Neale

[Rapunzel]

Oh, Matthew, I can so understand you and your wives emotions right now. I encourage you both to explore this site as you will find a lot of creative solutions to the money crunch. I also will tell you how we survived medical school with three children (we began with one child and had twins half-way through): My husband took an Air Force scholarship. At the time we were seriously worried that he had sold his soul in a way. Well, the fact is we will be beholden to the military for a few years but for us the pay-off of surviving financially during medical school was well worth it. IF you are interested in such a commitment you should research it fully and ask as many questions as you possibly can before you sign anything. It would mean an extra $1000/month which just let us survive during my husband's time in medical school. I feel for the both of you....

[PrincessFiona]

yipes

Matt...

Wow..that really does sound awful. I'm suprised at their inflexibility on this issue and that you will not be looking at getting the aid that you NEED! Don't forget to check out Access Group though...they may be able to offer you the rest of what you need..if not a large chunk of it!

There are a few sahm's here that also work from home...we have an article that I've been working on about this and as soon as I have all of the responses, I'll forward the info on to your via a private message as well. She may be able to look at her own talents and explore some options as a work-at-home mom. Also, you may post a question in the ed and career section and see if you can get some responses that way...there are some good work-from home options! I'll dig into my sources for you this week and try and get something to you by next weekend.

I know that one thing that I did was take classes during my husband's residency. We got FULL financial aid (Stafford Loans) and I took most ugrad courses in the evening...and even did a couple via distance ed. The money made a HUGE difference for us..and eventually led to me getting my MS when my kids were older...so you never know where it could lead her? The upside is that it was totally flexible.....I didn't HAVE to go to lecture if I didn't want or couldn't ( I could just study on my own) and classes are only 2 or 3 times a week depending on what days of the week that you take them. If you are a part-time student (6 semester hours) with children you are eligible for a bunch of aid...so it might be worth checking into. The downside was of course the studying...but it did give me something to do on call nights once the kids were in bed....


Other than that, Matt, we lived with one car, in a very small rental...and have a lot of credit card debt that we're trying to pay off now. We didn't use it to buy anything fancy...just...diapers etc .

Congrats on the baby2b!!! Hey...Tomorrow is July 6th.... :P Double Congrats!!!!

kris

Matt,

Reading your postings I so do fel for you. We went through the exact same thing with my husbands med school. We actually had two children while he was in school. We had alot of problems with the financial aid and lack of it. It felt as if someone else was telling you how to live your life while you bettered your financial future, which was angering. Looking back it was a very difficult time in my life as a wife of a med student and a new mom. I felt as if my childrens well being depended on me at the time due to lack of funds on my hubbys part. We lived in a third floor apt which was very noisy but we couldnt afford anything else. Luckily we had two cars and that was only because I worked. There were many times that we would have fallen short money wise if I had not had a job. Our financial aid for childcare was the exact same situation as yours. Luckily I talked my mom into staying home and I paid her the stipend they gave me for childcare aid. This way if I couldnt be there the kids would have to get the next best thing-Grandma. You may want to have your wife look into this possibility. Also be sure to check out the insurance plan for your wife and kids. Ours at my husbands school was awful. I hardly had coverage which was bad because I was having babies that was another factor in my having to work as well. Just having had a child the last thing your wife wants to hear is that she may have to work. I'd be lying if I were to tell you that the next 4 years were going to be easy. There were many bumps along the road but it will only make you stronger. My hubbys in his second year residency now and I get the luxery finally of staying home and being with my kids not to mention being pregnant with a third. When I look back now on those med school years I sometimes still wonder how we made it even with my income. There seemed to be so much unexpected costs that came up along the way. I'm pulling for you guys. I think you've found a good site because alot of us have been in your shoes. It's unfortunate that some schools are so horrible at understanding or caring how much it costs to get by. To me it felt at times like they were very caring about my hubby but not his family. You could indeed take out a personal loan which we had to do at one point and like others said you will live off credit cards and the bills will be massive but if that is the only option what can you do? We are still paying off those darn cards . I so feel for you guys. Good luck!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!