Do you enjoy formal entertaining?

[PrincessFiona]

I have always imagined myself a pizza and beer from the bottle gal. This past year I met a friend who does more formal entertaining. We take turns entertaining at our homes and serve on our fine china, etc.

I felt overwhelmed and inadequate about this at first.

Now, I really enjoy it.

Does anyone else enjoy pulling out the fine china?

Kris

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[Cinderella]

I've always been accustomed to informal family holidays where everyone pitches in. Within the last ten years however I've somehow become part of a group made up of much older woman who really enjoy all things to do with entertaining from dish sets to you name it. I been invited to several formal parties. They start with a written invitation which one is always excited and honored to get because you know it'll be an event. Some are intimate dinners of 6-8 people with several courses served at the persons house. There may be a poetry reading or a passage from a book to set the theme. Some cute silverware may be laid out that spells different words and goes with a dish set for the occasion. I've observed it's a lot about the different collections of dish sets at these things. Gifts may be given to guests and formal flower arrangements ordered to decorate for the special eveing. There is always a table of gourmet appetizers for mingling before hand over drinks. Afterwards coffee is usualy served with some form of fancy dessert or an array of delights set out as a dessert bar. For much larger formal home parties they may hire a bartender for their kitchen, have a buffet in several rooms and a wait staff to rotate trays of food and drinks and to clean up after people. These are parties of 20 or more invited to the home.

I've yet to hold my own entertaining event as we've not really landed on our feet yet but I can say I've had adequate training in the art. I've assisted several times holding an event and I find it frustrating just how much work has to go into it, especially the cleaning. I don't consider myself a great cook either. I have a few dishes I can make and feel proud to serve but cooking for a large gathering of people such as at Thanksgiving is exhausting for me as well. Then entertaining and cleaning up afterwards seems to take a lot out of me. I have a great appriciation for those who love to lavish this kind attention to detail on others, but I think I'd have to hire some help such as a maid, a chef, a bartender and wait staff if I wanted to have a party and enjoy it too.

Off Topic a little, I've learned that if dh asks me if we want to have guests over for dinner that means he expects me to do the cooking. I learned that the hard way the first time early in our marriage. It was really funny because I assumed if he was inviting them it meant he'd help with cooking or planned to do it himself. Come the day of, to my surprise, he expected me to cook for everyone which meant quick and easy spaghetti, bread, a salad and fresh fruit because it was all I knew how to get and prepare for a group while living abroad. At least they were surprised and pleased with the ice cubes in their drinks since I brought the trays with me from the states.

[houseelf]

No. I am just now to the place where I enjoy entertaining. Entertaining used to put me into a state of panic.

Now, we have people over about once a month. Sometimes we do a cook out. If it is a night party, I serve appetizers, wine, and beer. We turn on the stereo, dim the lights and light candles, and put out some Chinet. I typically invite a lot of people because entertaining for a crowd isn't that much harder than entertaining for a few.

Even for a more formal occasion like Easter, we have approximately 40 people come. Although I have inherited two sets of China, there is no way I'm doing a sit down dinner for 40 people. Sadly, my grandmothers beloved China may never be eaten on again.

FWIW, I have a good time when I entertain. It is my hope that my guest do. If I ever were to have to do something more swanky for DH's job, I'd hire it out. It is just beyond my comfort level.

[Phoebe]

I don't have china or a place to put it.

[L.Jane]

I don't have china or a place to put it.

This. I hope one day in the future. (Maybe four years from now?) We will have a house and dishes and all that. We have registered for our wedding and everything is going to my parents who live half way across the country. They will be storing all our wonderful new dishes and kitchen accessories until we finish residency and buy a house. Hopefully I will enjoy doing it then, especially for the holidays.

[BonBon]

My "china" is a service for 16 from Target.

We don't really do much formal entertaining except @ holidays. Our kids are still pretty young, though, and I hope to entertain more as they get older. (Dh and I were just talking about this today!) We occasionally throw big-ass parties, but we hire out for those. SO worth it.

[SoonerTexan]

Heck yeah. I've hosted a fully home cooked Mardi Gras dinner for 20 people for 3 years, among other events. We love to have friends over for dinner. Seriously, I live for this stuff.

Unfortunately I'm limited in space...and money

One day I hope to kick Martha Stewart's a** and just might do it considering I have been a devoted reader of Southern Living for 3 years at the ripe old age of...almost 23

[DCJenn]

I do enjoy formal entertaining but we don't do it that often. We entertain all the time, just not formally. I'm planning on having the poker gang over for a real live grown-up sit down dinner once the wanderer returns as a thank you for their constant support of me while DA (that's DumbAss) has been gone. I have all of the china/silver/crystal because I got it when I got married the first time and the rule when we split was that we each took what we'd been given by our respective families.

My family does the whole big formal thing for all holidays/birthdays/events and my mother can throw together a large dinner party for 20 people in a minute. She's "Brenda Stewart", cousin of Martha.

J.

[MDPhDWife]

Don't have china, doubt I ever will, but I DO enjoy entertaining, just on a casual laid back level that is better suited for our family's personality.

[HouseofWool]

I enjoy entertaining. A lot. But have never had the right place (or spouse) for it.

Last night was my divorce party and my best friend hosted. Basically, we did it at her house and I did all of the catering type stuff. It was a great time. Good food and wonderful friends.

But I always have that moment of anxiety between when the last detail it taken care of and before the first guest arrives, worried that no one will show. It definitely harkens back to childhood insecurities, ones that I know aren't realistic.

[SuzySunshine]

We love to entertain though we've done it A LOT less since we had little ones. I'm sure we'll do it more once they're older.

We were part of a Gourmet Club our first few years here and we met monthly at rotating houses with exotic menus, it was a lot of fun to dig out the china and crystal and serve fun foods.

We also like to do casual hosting too, we just like to have friends around.

[Meenah]

I only like to entertain in a very casual way.

[Pollyanna]

I LOVE to do formal entertaining. We have beautiful silver and china from our wedding. Unfortunately there seems to be no time once you have kids in activities and busy everyday of the week.

[Vishenka69]

To me "formal entertaining" is a sit down dinner for several couples, regardless of the dishes, cutlery, etc. Back in residency we had one of the bigger apts and I was one of the few people who enjoyed cooking, so we entertained a lot. The menu was fancy but the setting wasn't, every chair was a folding one and so was the table. My evite would usually state that if you're not in the first 6 replies, then you get to bring your own chair and silverware. Our friends still remember those dinners when they'd eat fancy french food on lawn chairs and drink good wine out of IKEA glasses. Now that have a real table with real chairs and nice dishes, I don't have the time to prep for a fancy dinner, so we haven't entertained nearly as much in the past year.

We also tried to do a dinner club but then 3 of us (out of the 4 couples, the other one being gay) got pregnant at almost the same time and the idea didn't last past 2nd trimester.