You might be a medspouse if...

[diggitydot]

- people assume that you have learned by osmosis and ask you for medical opinions when your DH is not around.

This drives me bonkers. How the fuck am I supposed to know?! The other offshoot of this phenomenon is that my own doctor starts using jargon as if I know what he/she is talking about because they know my husband is a physician. Great, do I need to have DH translate? I'm not the one who went to med school, asshat.

[L.Jane]

...when someone asks your spouse if they are available to do something, your spouse looks at you and repeats the question because you have their schedule memorized, synced to your Google calendar and can remotely access the online resident schedule. They can barely remember what they did today, let alone where they will be in 2 weeks time.

Yes, yes, and yes.

.
... When out to dinner with colleagues, the dinner conversation can turn the stomach of anyone sitting near by.

I once BEGGED my husband to allow us to have one meal that didn't involve the mention of anyone's bowel.

[HouseofWool]

I'll never forget dinner conversation with my mom, who was an ICU nurse, describing a patient that had been nicknamed Jabba the Hutt... Complete with bedsores. Good times.

[seaside*bliss]

I once BEGGED my husband to allow us to have one meal that didn't involve the mention of anyone's bowel.

Oh, how I can relate! It is even worse when your 6 yo son finds these comments hilarious


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[TulipsAndSunscreen]

How when you're super tired and can't think straight, only medical words come to mind:

I once barked at an associate...."This is an emergent situation. We NEED to send to the client NOW". They think I'm insane.

Or...this was once our pillow talk:

DH: "Orthopedics would be really cool but I'm glad I choose Urology"
Me: "But then you'd never know how to spell your specialty outside the US."
DH: "True....OrthopAEdics" (pronounced with a weird British accent...middle rhymes with "pay")
Me: "Or PAEdiatrics"
DH: "Or AnAEsethesia"
Me" HAEmatology"
Then there was some joking about foetal (fetal) and oestrogen (estrogen).

We're so nerdy.

[Chrisada]

DH's insanely loud 5 phone alarms start going off at 5 am. You have a back up alarm on your phone that starts going off shortly thereafter. You now cannot sleep from all the damn phone alarms, but refuse to get up. Me right now.

[MDPhDWife]

DH's insanely loud 5 phone alarms start going off at 5 am. You have a back up alarm on your phone that starts going off shortly thereafter. You now cannot sleep from all the damn phone alarms, but refuse to get up. Me right now.

This exact scenario has been the cause of MANY fights in my home. It's probably my biggest pet peeve.

[MrsK]

Oh yes! I've forbidden DrK from hitting the snooze button. I'll be awakened once. Not seven times, ever 8 minutes.

[L.Jane]

Oh yes! I've forbidden DrK from hitting the snooze button. I'll be awakened once. Not seven times, ever 8 minutes.

Yup. This. J now puts the alarm clock literally UNDER his pillow after the first one so that it just buzzes him.

[moonlight]

DH kept laughing when he went to sleep last night for about 30 minutes. He kept talking about something in his desk that was obviously cracking him up!

[MrsK]

I once interrupted DrK when he was talking in his sleep. I asked him to repeat himself, thinking he was talking to me. Still asleep, he irritably told me that he "was speaking to the attending physician."

[Chrisada]

DH has had his eyes open, looked at me and asked how far so and so is dilated. Maybe a form of sleep walking? He does this often and it always freaks me out.

[MrsK]

DrK once caught me sleep walking and talking. I was fretting about work and wondering how I'd get our dog to sign a joinder to enforce a clause in a declaration prohibiting her from jumping on the sofa.

[bokelley]

- when you get a phone call from a credit card company saying they have been trying to contact your husband about a bill he forgot to pay...
UGH!!!
That is now under my control along with all the other bills!