Being a grownup is tough

[houseelf]

We made a big decision this weekend about whether we would buy a larger house. We halfheartedly have been in the market because we are outgrowing our current digs rapidly.

After seeing some homes that fell in our price range, however, we decided to stick it out for a few more years in our current place. It is kind of frustrating because we could buy a great house in our home town for the same amount of money. For a frame of reference, $230,000 *might* buy a 3 bedroom 1950 ranch in these parts. We just couldn't find a house that fit our needs for the money that we were able/willing to spend. We're not about to buy a new house just because we can.

Our current house just doesn't completely mesh with how we use our space. We hardly ever use our downstairs except for storage and guests which makes us feel like we are bulging at the seams on the main level. Our three year old will not go to the basement by himself to play in his toy room. Instead of purchasing a new home, we decided to save our money and put our extra income towards private Montessori school education for our son. Hopefully, this will make our future cross country move a little easier on him. (fingers crossed). This decision was sort of a bittersweet realization that we will be living in attached housing for a few more years. Sometimes being a grown up isn't as fun as throwing caution to the wind. Yes, I do realize that I should thank my lucky stars that we own anything at all, but please allow me to indulge myself in this one smallish pity party. Wah.

Kelly

[SueC]

It sounds like you made a good choice Kelly. That reminds me of several years ago when our first daughter had just been born--I really wanted a Subaru Outback and we were so close to buying one. We crunched the numbers over and over again and tried to make it happen. They even had us test drive it over night (such a ploy!) but something in the pit of our stomachs just told us it wasn't right. We decided that the cars we had were just fine and we passed it up. We felt kind of proud of ourselves for making that decision, and have been thankful several times over that we didn't add to our debt by going for it. It still was hard to take the car back and turn the keys over, though! Maybe passing this chance up will make house hunting all the more fun when you decide the time is right.

Kelly,
I feel your pain. When DH was looking at the derm residency at U Minn (and I was making sarcastic shivering noises) we looked at housing prices in the twin cities and were shocked by how high they are. What happened to that idea of the affordable midwest? The decision was a considerable one since he was offered a possible spot outside the match and a start date of a year earlier. Cheap housing might have been enough to make me overlook the bitter cold. (I'm a cold weenie so no offense to those who like to ice fish and that sort of thing).
Anyway, the real estate market here is just crazy -- not N. California crazy, or NYC crazy....but enough to keep us from moving. With the second baby coming, we are feeling cramped. And while I have no problems having our kids share a room it is harder when our rooms are so small. We are also trying to make the house look not so cramped so that it will show better when we list it. So far, we are just packing things in those big Rubbermaid containers and putting them in closets. And anything not living or really heavy gets a serious glance for garage sale worthiness.
The good news for us is that the Portland market is about 15% or so under the Denver market. Meaning that for the (hopeful) sale price of our home plus about $25K we will get another bedroom,a little bit bigger of a house (bigger bedrooms is the hope), and *fingers crossed* maybe even nicely updated kitchen and bath.

So, I hear you. You feel like you are paying in the equity thing and should be getting ahead...and really you are. Just not quite as far ahead as you hoped!
And the education investment sounds like a good one. We are looking at a Montessori school on Friday in Portland. I am really excited to see it.

[Meenah]

Congrats on your decision, and you deserve to now take a nice long bubble bath and sip a glass of wine. Self pity can be so relaxing sometimes!!! I'm pretty good at it.

Luanne

[houseelf]

Sue, Nellie, Luanne,

Thanks for validating me. People really don't believe that the TC are expensive until they move here. Seriously, we are from another midwest state for crying out loud. Kris' family last came from the coastal State of Florida. Neither of our families really gave a second thought to the cost of real estate because, after all, this is the midwest. Little did we know that this muscle economy has attracted a host of transplants like usn who are all chasing a housing market with a scarcity of homes. I will definitely research housing costs a little better before our next move.

Actually, our decision not to buy feels good. Now, the trick is not to spend the extra money that we feel like we have. In practicality, this feels next to impossible...I really have to set up a higher amount for automatic savings withdrawal or student loan repayments. Seriously, if this money would have been tied up in a house, it might as well be changing our financial situation rather than going towards eating out, movies, and who- knows-what-else. The lazy part of me just doesn't want to scrimp at every turn anymore.

Nellie, here are some moving suggestions that our realtor gave us. If possible, place the majority of the toys in boxes out in the garage and park one of the cars on the street in order to show the place better. People will understand moving boxes in the garage better than clutter of toys and what nots. Also, a quick coat of paint, preferably white or at least neutral, is cheap and can really make a place seem neater and better kept than it is. I will try to post more ideas as I come across them.

Also, I LOVE this montessori school that we picked out for our son. It is the first time in three years of researching child care and education that I have actually felt really great about an option. You may want to ask if this school is accredited by the AMI. Apparently, just about any place can call themselves "montessori" without conforming to any sort of regulations or standards. Good luck. Now keep your fingers crossed that we get off the waiting list in time for next fall.

Whew. Could I cover any more topics in one thread?

Kelly

Kelly,
Glad to hear that the decision not to move is still feeling like the right one. Sounds like a good decision to me. Thanks for the moving tips! Our house is painted, well, anything but white. Safari red in the office, cork and peanut butter in the living and dining, "nile green" cabinets, lavender bedroom.....hopefully we find someone who likes our color preferences and wants to pay top $$ for our house! Great idea about neatly arranged moving boxes in the garage -- and we have an oversized 1 car garage so plenty of room for that.
We are going through the....ok, how much house can we really afford? What are interest rates going to do between now and then? etc, etc....
I think you could apply the crass description of "mental masturbation" to our recent conversations.
I really liked the montessori school we saw (I think it was AMI accredited) but we really have our fingers crossed for the Portland JCC preschool. We just loved it and it felt right. Definitely a huge weight off our shoulders with moving. And it is only 10-15 min from the OHSU campus and is near the areas we are looking for housing. BIG sigh of relief.