Coping Mechanisms that got you through tough training moments

[MrsK]

Oh, GMW, I'm right there with you! Not regarding out post-training city... I really like our city... but everything else! I'm sure that this thread is intended to provide coping mechanisms to people who are "in the trenches" during residency but, gosh, the transition to attendinghood is really rough. I think it was Angie who once said that it's like jumping from a train that is going 100 mph. I mean, I *knew* it would be hard. I *knew* that the kids would have to establish new routines. I *knew* that having a third baby this year would add to the stress. I *knew* that it would take at least 2 years for him to get the hang of his new responsibilities and 2 years before this city would feel like home. I *knew* that it was not going to be all champagne and orgasms. But, man, it's just miserable. I don't want to hijack but I'm really starting to look at the dark days of residency as happy times.

[MrsK]

I could go on but the baby is screaming and won't go to sleep.

[medpedspouse]

#1 - IMSN
#2 - not putting life on hold waiting for the dawkter to be able to join. (I had my own career, hobbies and friends) Traveled on my own.
#3 - looking forward to being "single" while he was gone. Dogs and take out dinner on the couch while watching what *I* wanted to watch or flip channels as much as I wanted to.
#4 - grad school. Misery does love company. Between a full time job and school, there was not much time to feel lonely. Plus, DH and I would marathon study together.
# 5 - having low expectations. We married 2 weeks before med school started and I never expected much time with DH. If we had time together that was bonus. I guess that it why I chose to do my own thing right along with him.

[MAPPLEBUM]

Oh, GMW, I'm right there with you! Not regarding out post-training city... I really like our city... but everything else! I'm sure that this thread is intended to provide coping mechanisms to people who are "in the trenches" during residency but, gosh, the transition to attendinghood is really rough. I think it was Angie who once said that it's like jumping from a train that is going 100 mph. I mean, I *knew* it would be hard. I *knew* that the kids would have to establish new routines. I *knew* that having a third baby this year would add to the stress. I *knew* that it would take at least 2 years for him to get the hang of his new responsibilities and 2 years before this city would feel like home. I *knew* that it was not going to be all champagne and orgasms. But, man, it's just miserable. I don't want to hijack but I'm really starting to look at the dark days of residency as happy times.

no hijack, can you expound a little? he's psych, right? isn't the lifestyle supposed to be pretty good? can you reflect on decisions that may have made it easier? is it really the stress of his life (how long has he been practicing?) or mostly that you have 3 very precocious children all....age 5 and under?


in other news my husband has announced to his attendings that he plans to go into one of the most competitive sub specialties. also the one that makes the 'ophtho is good lifestyle' stereotype a lie. they're all very supportive and happy which is good, but now has to amp up the research hardcore. this is a big change for us. it's always been written in our bilaws that once training is over he will have about zero call. it's like part of our agreement. but the thing I know now that I didn't know then is even if he's not working all day into the middle of the night he's that type of person who has to be doing SOMETHING. he's never going to slow down so he might as well occupy his time with work. plus, I want him to pursue his passion. I'm happy for him. someone check in 10 years and see if I'm still saying that?


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[MrsK]

I'll open a new thread in Call Room. I don't want to hijack or air my dirty linen here.