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What is your greatest challenge right now

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  • #31
    Being the breadwinner, the majority (like 98% of the time) parent, the secretary, the housekeeper, and (sometimes) the womb. Am I supposed to do EVERYThing?
    Married to a Urology Attending! (that is an understated exclamation point)
    Mama to C (Jan 2012), D (Nov 2013), and R (April 2016). Consulting and homeschooling are my day jobs.

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    • #32
      Originally posted by diggitydot View Post
      My biggest challenge? The dude not being able to get a break. He's always "on" unless he's on vacation. And he's baaaad about scheduling his vacations. Dude needs a break for his own mental health
      I feel your pain, especially since this was the case when my DH was still in surgery. I kept reminding him then about needing to maintain work/life balance. He looked at me with scorn every time as he replied that he "needs to" check his email/access work stuff from home/etc. He's doing better now he's in radiology, but he still can't stop looking up work stuff in his free time. Ah medicine....

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      • #33
        My greatest challenge right now is me having a "Mona Lisa Smile" moment. I've been a part time grad student / part time homemaker for more than a year now; it was a really big change from me being the sole provider as he finished up med school. We both went to a good undergrad and I am talented in my own respect to be able to contribute to society. But, what good are my talents when I have to take care of most of the things at home to let him focus on his career? And women in the past fought so hard to get an education and to be able to enter the workforce....for me to stay at home now? Ugh. The feeling sucks.

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        • #34
          1.) The fact that there is a part of DH that is an emotionally immature --instant gratification teenager that hasn't been forced to grow. I'm looking at him sometimes saying to myself that "this is IT?" Really? He's crazy successful and making big bucks. His student loans are PAID (I brought no debt to our marriage). However, there is a huge part of his personality that he has kept in a box to "keep on swimming" that is incredibly unflattering (pretty pathetic) and to me EXHAUSTING.

          The world doesn't owe you JACK dude. YOU CHOSE THIS LIFE. Pull your head out and start smelling the roses before they DIE.

          2.) His sleep. Still an issue. He doesn't get enough.

          3.) His time. He doesn't have enough away from the hospital and it's unpredictable (mostly) when he does.
          Flynn

          Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

          “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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          • #35
            Originally posted by Flynn View Post
            1.) The fact that there is a part of DH that is an emotionally immature --instant gratification teenager that hasn't been forced to grow. I'm looking at him sometimes saying to myself that "this is IT?" Really? He's crazy successful and making big bucks. His student loans are PAID (I brought no debt to our marriage). However, there is a huge part of his personality that he has kept in a box to "keep on swimming" that is incredibly unflattering (pretty pathetic) and to me EXHAUSTING.

            The world doesn't owe you JACK dude. YOU CHOSE THIS LIFE. Pull your head out and start smelling the roses before they DIE. .
            I'd like to know more about this. Seems to be a pretty common problem.

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            • #36
              Him being at an away rotation (4th yr) and his schedule being completely opposite of mine. Haven't talked more than a few texts in days. I am so lonely. I have a lot I want to talk about in regards to my work but he's not there to talk to. He does have time to check Facebook though, just not to text me. I hope this loneliness goes away and I get used to it. Also, worried I don't cross his mind as much as he is in my mind.


              Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

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              • #37
                Originally posted by argie View Post
                My greatest challenge right now is me having a "Mona Lisa Smile" moment. I've been a part time grad student / part time homemaker for more than a year now; it was a really big change from me being the sole provider as he finished up med school. We both went to a good undergrad and I am talented in my own respect to be able to contribute to society. But, what good are my talents when I have to take care of most of the things at home to let him focus on his career? And women in the past fought so hard to get an education and to be able to enter the workforce....for me to stay at home now? Ugh. The feeling sucks.
                That was a tough transition here too. I might only have been a secretary during medical school, but I kept the lights on in our little apartment, you know? When I was job searching, and then staying home with a baby, while he worked and I put many of my needs dead last, it was a weird shift for someone who'd been on a headlong path to be a physics professor some short 4-5 years prior.
                Alison

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                • #38
                  Originally posted by valerie View Post
                  Him being at an away rotation (4th yr) and his schedule being completely opposite of mine. Haven't talked more than a few texts in days. I am so lonely. I have a lot I want to talk about in regards to my work but he's not there to talk to. He does have time to check Facebook though, just not to text me. I hope this loneliness goes away and I get used to it. Also, worried I don't cross his mind as much as he is in my mind.
                  I'm sure living in a "bachelor pad" is no fun. My husband had to deal with guy roommates and a crummy little twin bed again during his away, and during our infrequent phone calls did sound homesick...does your program require aways, or is this an audition rotation thing?
                  Alison

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                  • #39
                    Yes, the Mona Lisa Smile. I'm content not working but miss having my own income. I'm busier than ever and I do feel like my contribution to our family is important. But I also feel like I've disappointed my mentors and failed to preserve the path for younger women in my profession.

                    Sent from my SCH-I545 using Tapatalk
                    Wife and #1 Fan of Attending Adult & Geriatric Psychiatrist.

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