If you could go back in time and change something

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The problem with this question is that we're not supposed to know things until we're supposed to know them. Maybe the wisdom we have now would have robbed us of the innocence if we had it then. Maybe the not knowing was the gift then and the knowing is the gift now.

I will tell you this. I live my life a HELL of a lot more relationship centered than I ever have before. I'm still getting stuff done, but people first.

I also do not regret a single dollar I have ever spent on travel. (Believe me I spent it when I didn't have it). I rarely remember the things I bought though.

That's interesting. And good to remember

I have a hard time saying I wish *I* hadn't done something because I see how those decisions changed the course of my life. What I do wish is that my parents had sent me to a performing arts boarding school like the considered when I was young. I would've had way better training and would've avoided all of the mess of my family life.

TBCH this is something I've been thinking a lot about because I got another sorrowful email from my mom saying "I just hope my kids are better than me and your dad" on X subject. This was the first I'd heard from her since all the weirdness with coming / not coming to visit. It occurred to me that has been her one resounding mantra my entire life: don't be like me. Don't make this choice, like I did, when I was your age. I wish for my mom that she had more confidence and satisfaction in her life, but also for me who lived my early years saying to myself "look, still a virgin!" "look, still no kids!" "look, finished the degree!"

[gem]

I wish I could go back and seek treatment for postpartum depression. I missed out on my own baby's babyhood. Sure I powered through, but the price was too high.