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Thanks for all the advice!!

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  • Thanks for all the advice!!

    I wanted to thank everyone for their advice thus far. My bf has just entered his 3rd year of MS. Surgery being his first clerkship (and a busy one by that) I had no idea what to expect besides NOT A LOT!! Prior to him starting he and I had a terrible fight, we worked things out and compromised on a great arrangement thanks to some of the advice I have received here. We made a date at least once every other weekend to spend time with each other and are sticking each other too it. The first time I saw him after making this arrangement we were both so happy to just be with each other and really enjoyed the time we spent together. I also started school!! so I'm busy as well which is nice because prior to my being in school I always felt like I was "waiting" for him and after having our discussion realized I couldn't have that mentality or I would seriously be unhappy all the time. Now I keep busy with school, friends, family, myself oh and the boyfriend when possible.
    He told me that once he started surgery he would seriously have no time, but I never believed him until he actually started. Wow, the books they have to read and the time they spend in the hospital.. and then they honestly do just come home and crash. I appreciate all of the advice and posts on this forum..

    Thanks..

  • #2
    Cheers to you and your bf!! Sounds like you've found a good balance and hopefully on his lighter rotations you'll have more time together.

    What are you in school for?

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    • #3
      Communication is a big key here...that way you both feel heard despite limited time together. It keeps resentments at bay!

      It sounds like you are learning to pick your battles with this life --- a HUGE issue with most people in the beginning because there is so much that is not ideal. If you mentioned it all you would never have time for fun or a life for that matter!

      Keep it up!
      Flynn

      Wife to post training CT surgeon; mother of three kids ages 17, 15, and 11.

      “It is our choices, Harry, that show what we truly are, far more than our abilities.” —Harry Potter and the Chamber of Secrets " Albus Dumbledore

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      • #4
        Yes, I've realized when to pick my battles.. basically I kept so much in while he was studying for boards it ALL came out one night.. I was expecting it to be like when we first dated and we were together a lot of the time. I realize now that, that isn't going to happen because we both don't have that time. But we still make the time to see one another so that is good and we are happy..
        Yes, I started school!! I'm going back to finish up my bachelor's degree in business management!! Its something I've wanted to start for over a year now and well I just went and did it!!!

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        • #5
          Good for you! Sounds like it's the perfect time to pick up your studies.

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