my grrrrr of the day

[Cumberland]

I was talking about needing new clothes today ( i havent been shopping months bc of finances) and someone at work said, oh you must be able to buy whatever you want since your husband is a doctor and you are an NP.

I know it is common to get these comments but I never have before. I had already told this person ( why it is her busines i have no idea) that DH makes less than a nurse as a resident. I am still adjusting to taking close to an 80% pay decrease in my job due to going part time and living in a low cost of living area. I was so annoyed.

There's a good emoticon for you! I know, those comments are annoying.

[SueC]

That is annoying!
I've got friends that think in a few months (when fellowship is over) we're going to be rolling in it, but we've done the math and we'll be slightly better off than we are now. I think they see that my dh is gone more than their husbands are (like Christmas morning, for instance) but they still tend to glamorize the whole doctor's wife thing.

[HeartRN]

You never get it 'till you LIVE it!!!! :>

You should read the thread What do I call my DH? Similar issues are addressed. You will see my post too about a recent comment I got from a very ignorant neighbor.
I am at the point where I want to go on Oprah to tell the world WHAT MEDICAL EDUCATION IS REALLY LIKE! AND LAY TO REST THESE RIDICULOUS STEREOTYPES AND ASSUMPTIONS!

As the spouse of a surgery resident with 9 years of near poverty stricken training total, I feel enormous pressure to be the breadwinner of the family as well handle everything in real life that DH is too busy or to tired to do. I am very proud that DH is becoming a surgeon but the financial stress involved is without a doubt our greatest issue. Yet, everyone around me, including family members think I shop all day long.
Very few outside the medical community have a clue what serious financial risk and stress is involved in becoming a doctor. Especially for those poor, impoverished souls who take out full loans and foot the bill themselves! Granted, being a doctor is a great job, one of the few jobs that provides good financial security. And I am very happy to see my DH love his job, despite the long hours. However, it takes a very long time to get there for many and the financial risk can be enormous.
Like you, I have tried to explain to some that residents make very little money and work very long hours. Unless I tell them his actual salary, most often they simply do not believe me and treat me as if I am totally exaggerating. As if he makes millions and that isn't enough for the spoiled doctor's wife!

The worst was when my husband's patients, during residency, told him, "Well, you wouldn't understand because you're a rich doctor." My husband's response was usually, "Actually, I make $5.70 an hour so I think I do understand."