Bitter Sweet Endings...

[houseelf]

Wow! As someone who will be in your shoes in two short years, I can only imagine. Gen. surgery residency has been hellish at times, but it has been my life for 5 years. This is our life in a new place where our children are little and yet there is never enough time, energy, money. It is such a mixed bag. Best wishes to you.

Kelly

[Sheherezade]

Annie -

You are right to feel the way that you do. My husband went from fellowship to attending last year and the transitition is significant. It is very different NOT being in training any longer. New positions bring positives and negatives. It is sad that we don't see the positive parts of the place we are in until we leave it. I'm glad you appreciate the bonding aspect of residency. It's hard to get that through the suffering . Next year will be difficult for you, but hopefully you will get many benefits from moving up. I'm sorry you are sad. I felt that last year too, and still feel it to some degree. Thanks for posting.

Tell me about it - I'm having a lot of the same conflicts. I'm thrilled to be moving on, about the offer/position/opportunity that my DH has, but v. sad to be leaving our home and our friends. We're all scattering about, and while intentions are good, you know we'll lose touch with some. We were newlyweds together, suffered intern hours together, had babies together --- it's a big-time bond!

This time last year I kept prodding a woman whose DH was finishing about how excited she must be and how great life must be, and I thought she was being a fuddy-duddy b/c she kept saying things were "okay". Now I get it.

That said, we just went to our new city (Kansas City) this weekend for some power house-hunting, found a place we loved, and put in a bid, so that has upped the excite-o-meter for me just a tad.

[Amiens]

I find myself NOT packing right now. You would think that with us moving in 40 days that I would have started packing- NOPE! I find myself tearing up too- I have grown to love Seattle and the bonds we have formed here. For me I am uneasy of the great unknown of life after residency. We are moving to a new city, and this will be our first job.

I know for me as sadistic the hours and hardships of residency are I find it comforting in a way, because this life is all I have known since we have been dating and married the past almost 8 years. It scares me a bit because I don't know what life is like not hearing my daughter say "Daddy lives at his hospital home" or "Can I call daddy at his hospital home?" I don't know what it's like to have Matt home possibly at a decent hour, before the kids go to bed. I don't know what it's going to be like to have more than 3 weeks of vacation, and to actually be able to go see our friends and family. Most of all, I have no idea what it's like to live in a house! We have always lived in a cheap apartment As sick and twisted as this sounds, part me wishes Matt had done a fellowship in peds, that way I could stay in my crazy houred, apartment living, away from family comfort zone.

Whew! That felt good. I think I will be spending quite a bit of time hear when we make the transition from resident to attending. Hey, it will be a lot cheaper than therapy.

Just know you are not alone.

Best wishes,
Crystal