Support for your Girl Friend a Military Doctor

Hello! I'm new to this list and I need some help. My Girlfriend is in her intern year of Intenal Medicine. Ever since med school she has wanted to be a GI doctor but has recently changed her mind. Due to the call schedule and the lifestyle she is currently living she has lost a lot of the compassion she once had for patients. She complains on a daily bases about how stressful everything is and how her personal life is pretty much thrown away and in the garbage. She has even thought about other jobs that she could have outside of medicine. However, she is a military doctor and doesn't have much choice in the matter. Recently she has started looking at specialties with the easiest lifestyle. She is setting her focus on Endocrinology.

My question are as follows: Is this a normal thing for interns to go through? Do the second and third years get a better? Any advice to help improve her outlook on being a doctor?

Thanks,
Jim

Jim --

I thought I'd respond to your post as we have some experience in this area. My husband is now a third year medicine resident and changed his mind a few times before settling on Infectious Diseases. For example, in med school he was considering ENT but then decided on medicine. And in residency he was considering Palliative Care as a fellowship (very new, mostly hospice and end-of-life care, not even a boarded fellowship yet). He eventually decided on ID and is very happy with his choice -- he starts his fellowship in July.

Long story short, intern year is very difficult and I think it's completely normal for interns and residents to get burned out and reconsider many of their choices. Things get better when they are doing electives and are getting regular sleep and meals. Otherwise things can get somewhat gloomy for them. But it's only temporary -- something yo can remind your girlfriend of often. It's a really touch field but I'm sure you and your girlfriend will make the right choices for you. Also this is a great place to vent, ask questions, etc because we are all going through the same thing, just in different stages!

Good luck and keep us posted!

Jill

Hi Jim. My wife (4th year med student) frequently rants about switching careers, etc. She just gets real frustrated when she feels "locked in", as if she could do nothing else if she quit med school. I have found that the best thing you can do is keep encouraging her, plan lots of social activities for when she gets time off, and just listen. I would bet that most of the time she just wants someone who will empathize with her. HTH!

Been there....

Hey, just wanted to add some info from someone who has been there. My wife went through her intern year with the same feeling, 'do I really know what I am supposed to do?!' I think that the schooling they get is great, but what is needed is just lots of encouragement and to be reminded that they know what needs to be done in whatever situation they are placed in. The worst part about intern year for my wife seemed to be the "pimping" from attending docs. It seemed that they were just on a mission to make her feel that she did know what she was doing (along with the loss of sleep).
Having said that, my wife did her intern year twice. She is a DO and it was a political thing in order for her to be recognized by the AOA. I am just rambling now...she is a 2nd year resident in Pediatrics, and yes it gets better, slowly but better. As far as the military part goes, I don't know....yet. My wife has a commitment with the Air Force when she completes her residency next year.
My wife has said several times that she could have been done if she has chosen law school, and not have the debts to go along with it, and a social life too. It gets better, but mostly it is what you can tolerate and make of it!