Last night Daegan developed a nodule/mass in his groin and the resident and NP thought it was an abcess....looked and felt to be in the exact location of the inguinal lymph node...and no other node was palpable around it....yeah, that's also what the attending thought. I hate that I'm being a non-attending hater.... Russ is a resident and I was an intern last year....but somehow on the other side it's different. OK not really, and there really is no excuse...I just suck. But anyway, so since the lymph node was nice a big and the leg is still swollen and the foot is more swollen...they ordered an ultrasound. No results yet. But the plan is unless the find an abcess to drain...we're just going to wait for the blood cultures....if they come back positive and we have no lesion to drain, then we go to MRI. They're also getting an ID consult.

He's doing great otherwise. He's such a little trooper to have to put up with all of this...and his IV's keep blowing, so they have to restick and restick...I think an IV started all of this in the first place...he had a catheter in that leg...lower down but still that leg...I found a few case reports of children with Staph aureus femoral osteomyelitis and myositis from small wounds on their distal extremity...not that I think the nurses are doing a crappy job...it's just a risk of being stuck with a needle. So I'm hoping that if we get negative blood cultures and we don't have an abcess to drain....that I can get him home on PO anitbiotics after a week or so of IV antibiotics. So he doesn't have to keep getting stuck. I think I may be getting ahead of myself, but I have to keep looking to the future.

I hate sitting there rocking him...I mean I love sitting and rocking him...just not there. It's so soothing to me and him...and I want to fall asleep with him...I did today....and was woken up and told I can't do that....if I feel sleepy I need to "take a break." It made me mad...Ugh...he's my freakin' kid and I don't like being told what to do around him/with him. I hate that I have to follow rules in caring for my own child....take his temperature, change his diaper, then you can take him out and hold him, make sure he's swaddled, put on his hat, make sure there are 15 freakin' blanket layers between you so you can't possibly connect/bond...ergardless of the fact that I have a hotblooded boy who hates being all bundled/hatted 'cause he overheats.

GRRRR!! I just want him home!