I'm not very good at updating this thing. Actually, looking at it, it all seems very negative. I guess I only post when I want to get something off my chest.

The last few weeks have been pretty good. I love my new job and I'm seriously considering a career in photography or something along those lines. We're getting used to the new routine. It's strange since I hadn't worked in so long.

I took down my ticker as we are no longer going to Ireland. We simply can't afford it. At first I was devastated, I haven't seen my family in 9 months!! But, as I think about it, maybe it would be better to wait until we're properly settled here. We're just starting to develop a sense of normality after the immigration process, DH's awful rotations and my starting a new job. I have to tell my family today, which is going to be awful. DH suggested that I go on my own but I think it would be weird. My family hasn't seen us since we got married. My grandparents have never met him. It just doesn't feel right going without him. I had promised myself that the next time I went, it would be with my husband. I don't know, he thinks it would be great for me to go alone but I don't like the idea. Is that so wrong? I've waited this long, what difference will another few months make.

I really think that this vacation (thinking of going to Florida) will do us the world of good. We were fighting all weekend and it was awful. Is short, he thinks that I'm just not happy. He has this constant fear that I'll decide it's too much for me and go back to Ireland, which is rediculous! It was awful to hear him say that, especially since I've been much happier now that I'm working. I really felt like I'd been making some progress. Sure it's been very difficult but I just moved to another country, it's going to take some time to adjust. Everything is so different and I get frustrated, like him having to show me how to lodge my paycheck, stupid things like that. We agreed that I would go and see a councellor, which I have been suggesting for months. Next step is making an appointment! DH thinks that he can fix everything, thinks that he can make me happy but that's not how it works. I just need to figure out how to deal with all this change in a more positive way. We did talk about a lot of things so I guess it turned out to be a pretty productive weekend after all.

Oh, I've got to start posting with some good news for a change.