So from today onwards, I get closer and closer to 40 and farther and farther from 30.

I have no birthday plans. My parents sent me a Kindle in the mail, which I'm excited about. Mac gave me a birthday card with a Starbucks giftcard. I think he ordered me something for the Kindle too, since there is a "your order is on the way" email in my account. He's not savvy enough to send these things to his account only... He wants me to choose somewhere for us to go as a family to eat out on Sunday. Sigh. I don't want to go with the family. I'm sick of the family to be honest. I want to go off to Amish country for a weekend with my Kindle... alone. Seriously, I'm just overloaded. With the weather being as it is, with the snow days, with the Teenager giving me hell about this and that, and with the 6 year old picking fights all.the.time... I just don't want to deal with it. Then Mac suggests a place to eat that I don't even like. Really? A little thought maybe? Sigh. His entire focus is on his stupid exam. First weekend of March, every year, he takes a Big Exam. He's pretty much a self-absorbed ass for the 3 months leading up to the Big Exam. He is studying at the computer all the time he's home. Then he sighs about doing the dishes, or taking out the trash... But he finds time to go to the gym. Whatever. How can I get off this roller coaster?

In other news, I think our refridgerator is dying. At least the ice machine part is. At least it is the weekend and Mac should be home and he can maybe take a look at it. Which means on Monday I'll be calling a plumber, LOL.

Kate skipped PE yesterday. I was so pissed. I'm STILL pissed. I just can't take it. What the hell does she think she's going to do with her life? It's, of course, over some stupid boyfriend. She made up a story about skipping PE to go to walk around the school with her friend, then she changed the story to be that she went to science class with her friend because I texted her friend to ask her why the hell she's skipping class. Anyway, whatever. The story changed 4 times, and I'm just sick of this crap. I'm just sick of dealing with Kate's drama, and her boyfriend issues, and her woe is me attitude. LOL. Woe is me, like this post right! Well, anyway... So Mac escapes while I'm "explaining" to Kate that she's grounded from everything (even her precious ipod bc it has wifi and she just goes on facebook with it when she loses her cell phone and can't text.) And that I don't care if "all the other kids" skip class. I hate her high school. I don't want to homeschool her, and she'd hate me forever if I took her out of her school, but... I hate her high school. Then she says, *You were valedictorian, and you have a college degree, and you don't even have a job.* Right. Well, I tried to explain to her that I have the ability at least to go to get a Masters. If she is a dropout like all those other kids who skip school and "their parents don't even care", good luck getting a job let alone a decent job. She is 15. She thinks she doesn't want to go to college. She thinks she wants to stay home and text all day and eat whatever is in the kitchen and hang out with her friends when she feels like it.

She has been heavily influenced by the "Do what Feels Right and what Makes You Happy" movement in media, otherwise known as self-esteem building. Judge me if you want. But until you've walked my shoes... I have poured myself into this girl, to the detriment of myself and the other kids. I have invested so much in her. Sigh. I just don't know. I feel at times like I should cash in on that investment, and start to focus on the others. That's kind of brutal honesty there. That's parenting a teen.

Anyway, that's my birthday. I wish I could move my birthday to another month, like May or June. A month where I feel a little bit hopeful about life, a little less sick of it all. But, no...

And the frickin refridgerator keeps on making wierd noises. Good thing Mac is a doctor. We can totally afford a new fridge.