DH's last work day was Friday...now he has vacation for a week. Yeah!!!! He's already taken his mom off of my back a little. Also, he had a talk with her about her nagging and criticisms and she has backed way off.
Yesterday, Thomas took his mom to home depot for cleaning supplies and to the grocery store while I was able to go to the library with the kids.
Right now, I have them each researching a topic of interest to them. Andrew is doing a power point on the origin of the universe, Amanda is doing a poster project about tornadoes and Alex is learning about turtles. He wants a box turtle for his birthday and so he's going to have to learn all about them and their care before I'll go for it. (Like we don't have enough animals in this house ).
Discussions about selling our house and our neighbor are winding down again (probably until her next hysterical outburst or the next problem with the bullying issue and her daughter). I am going to HAVE to find a way to cope with this woman's ups and downs so I am not riding the rollercoaster with her. Amanda is so upset about the problems between her and the neighbor's daughter that she literally begged me the other night to give her a "normal childhood". It really got to me and was part of what sent me over the deep end.
But I have to wonder...perhaps...what she is experiencing IS normal childhood nowadays. Andrew doesn't even want to go to school anymore because during phy ed the boys and girls tease him, laugh at him, call him names and trip him. Why? He's not athletic and he's not into the local sports teams.
FYI. Andrew is a great kid. He is kind, gentle, is wonderful with Zoe and Aidan, does well in school.....He's really a terrific person. I am very proud of the person he is. WTH is wrong with these kids who only value athletics...who can't accept that Andrew has his good qualities...they just don't involve sports.
Andrew has given up on the idea of talking to the teachers or doing anything about it. Add to that the fact that there are no levels now for math or language arts etc and he is bored to death. He has said that basically he is no longer interested in school and "what about homeschooling me, mom".
I feel like we can never catch a break.
This is why people always say "why?" when they find out that we have more than 2 children. It isn't because children themselves are so much work or stress. Honestly, they aren't. The extra laundry is a pain, but talking to the kids, reading to them, playing with them...it isn't work. I actually enjoy night feedings, toddler play areas and walks with the buggy. Since I don't actually do a good job of cleaning up, that isn't extra work :> I don't mind the sleep-overs, the chaos, the homework or taking them to activities. I enjoy baking with them, doing crafts and watching movies downstairs while we all share popcorn. When I consider all of that stuff....having 5 children is great...the more the merrier.
The *work* though, the part that is mind-numbing, frustrating and sometimes feels unbearable is the constant advocating at school and the worry over social issues . This is the part of being a mom that I am really struggling with...and I feel that I struggle alone. For the most part, these are less-discussed issues. Very few other moms really talk about the social/school problems. I have better talks about these things with other....dads for some reason. I think it is mommy competitiveness or something.
Other than that, what I mostly hear about is how the child is in competitive hockey and is trying to balance that schedule with their violin/orchestra schedule and extra spanish lessons.
I sometimes DO think that homeschooling would be easier because I would be able to control the educational atmosphere as well as the social aspect of their lives. Ultimately though, I know that I couldn't do it full-time....and I don't know that it would be *real world* enough for them.
It's just hard to feel so alone on these issues and not really feel like I have many people to turn to to discuss the realities of motherhood.
Kris
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November 12, 2006
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