Preparing Children For a Move by Kristen Math

Moving can be a stressful event for parents. We get so busy planning packing and preparing to leave that it can be easy to overlook our children’s stress. Depending on the age of your child there are some steps that you can take to ease them through the transition.

Babies and toddlers:

Young children can not understand the concept of moving. Your home and family is their world. you may want to read a story about moving. The Berenstain Bears’ Moving Day is an age-appropriate choice. It will be reassuring to the toddler to help you pack some of their favorite toys into a box or their own little suitcase.

School-Aged Children:

As children form relationships with their peers and enter school, the issue of moving can be quite stressful. It is important to recognize and address their fears and talk about any loss they may be feeling. Friendships are central in children’s lives and there may be significant grief associated with moving. Even children as young as Kindergarten may show symptoms of sadness and ask about old friends.

To ease the transition, take pictures of your new home and hang them up on the refrigerator. Spend time talking about the exciting changes coming and refrain from sharing any anxiety that you may have.

Teenagers:

The teen-age years are punctuated by emotions and dramatic changes. Teen-agers lives revolve around their friendships. A move at this time is likely to be perceived as a traumatic event. Your teen-ager will be dealing with the loss of established relationships and the anxiety of starting over at this emotionally vulnerable time in their life. They may also miss out on some organized school activitieds especially if “try-outs” or “sign-ups” were at the end of the previous school year.

What can you do to help?

• Acknowledge your children’s loss and make yourself available to talk
• Involve your children in the move. Allow them to help pack and even help with house hunting
• Maintain a positive attitude and refrain from burdening your children with your own anxiety or grief
• Help your children keep touch with their friends by allowing the occasional phone call or helping to establish an email address.
• Monitor yourself and your children for any signs of depression and don’t hesitate to reach out to your family doctor or pediatrician if you feel that you or your children need additional help.