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woah - overwhelmed *again*

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  • #1

    woah - overwhelmed *again*

    hi everyone -

    i've had it. i've had it with this long-distance crap.

    i think i have finally reached the point. everyone has always said "oh wow - you two do so well! how do you ever do it?" well, i just did it and that's it. that is all i can do. i just went out there for the weekend and i realized that it is affecting our relationship and how could it not?! first, it takes me like 24 hours to reorient myself to him and his city and all that. then we have to talk and i'm not so good at that because i'm like what is the point because i leave in 24 hours and you don't know what i do from day to day then. and by the time we are back in the swing of things, my plane is taking off. only four and a half months left but what will it do? do you think there will be any permanent damage?



    i'm so blah right now. it's spring break and i didn't stay out there because i have a bunch of things to take care of here and then i'm PROCRASTINATING so i could have stayed out there but he's on an awful rotation this month so i would only see him two hours per day anyway with no car. i am not excited about anything. the wedding. school. nothing.



    ok, thanx for listening!
    Tags: None
  • #2
    hi everyone -

    i've had it. i've had it with this long-distance crap.

    i think i have finally reached the point. everyone has always said "oh wow - you two do so well! how do you ever do it?" well, i just did it and that's it. that is all i can do. i just went out there for the weekend and i realized that it is affecting our relationship and how could it not?! first, it takes me like 24 hours to reorient myself to him and his city and all that. then we have to talk and i'm not so good at that because i'm like what is the point because i leave in 24 hours and you don't know what i do from day to day then. and by the time we are back in the swing of things, my plane is taking off. only four and a half months left but what will it do? do you think there will be any permanent damage?



    i'm so blah right now. it's spring break and i didn't stay out there because i have a bunch of things to take care of here and then i'm PROCRASTINATING so i could have stayed out there but he's on an awful rotation this month so i would only see him two hours per day anyway with no car. i am not excited about anything. the wedding. school. nothing.



    ok, thanx for listening!

    Comment

    • #3
      hi everyone -

      i've had it. i've had it with this long-distance crap.

      i think i have finally reached the point. everyone has always said "oh wow - you two do so well! how do you ever do it?" well, i just did it and that's it. that is all i can do. i just went out there for the weekend and i realized that it is affecting our relationship and how could it not?! first, it takes me like 24 hours to reorient myself to him and his city and all that. then we have to talk and i'm not so good at that because i'm like what is the point because i leave in 24 hours and you don't know what i do from day to day then. and by the time we are back in the swing of things, my plane is taking off. only four and a half months left but what will it do? do you think there will be any permanent damage?



      i'm so blah right now. it's spring break and i didn't stay out there because i have a bunch of things to take care of here and then i'm PROCRASTINATING so i could have stayed out there but he's on an awful rotation this month so i would only see him two hours per day anyway with no car. i am not excited about anything. the wedding. school. nothing.



      ok, thanx for listening!

      Comment

      • #4
        I can totally relate to the overwhelming feelings. I am so sick of being a medical widow. I am so sick of being a medical spouse. I am so sick of being alone to fend for myself. I am so sick of having to be strong and take care of everyone and everything. I feel so trapped and so tied down. I am so sick of playing second fiddle.



        That being said. There are times that make it all worth the crap you put up with. It will get better once you are together. And the special moments make it all worthwhile. I swear.

        Comment

        • #5
          I can totally relate to the overwhelming feelings. I am so sick of being a medical widow. I am so sick of being a medical spouse. I am so sick of being alone to fend for myself. I am so sick of having to be strong and take care of everyone and everything. I feel so trapped and so tied down. I am so sick of playing second fiddle.



          That being said. There are times that make it all worth the crap you put up with. It will get better once you are together. And the special moments make it all worthwhile. I swear.

          Comment

          • #6
            I can totally relate to the overwhelming feelings. I am so sick of being a medical widow. I am so sick of being a medical spouse. I am so sick of being alone to fend for myself. I am so sick of having to be strong and take care of everyone and everything. I feel so trapped and so tied down. I am so sick of playing second fiddle.



            That being said. There are times that make it all worth the crap you put up with. It will get better once you are together. And the special moments make it all worthwhile. I swear.

            Comment

            • #7
              I really do understand what your talking about.Phill and i went thru that when he lived on the west coast and me on the east.After a few months i knew i had to move out there cause it was just no normal relationship living apart.Like you said...the time it takes to get used to each other.I knew he couldn't give up his practice and come here so i moved there....but few home once or twice a month to get my bills and pay them and to see my kids.I'm not sorry that i did that as i thought and still think we'd have never had a relationship not to mention marriage if we weren't together.And when we were apart we both missed each other so much we thought we'd die.It turned out i loved Ca. and it was one of the happiest 18months of my life.But you can only do so much.I know how hard it is for both of you.I hope it gets easier.

              Lynn

              Comment

              • #8
                I really do understand what your talking about.Phill and i went thru that when he lived on the west coast and me on the east.After a few months i knew i had to move out there cause it was just no normal relationship living apart.Like you said...the time it takes to get used to each other.I knew he couldn't give up his practice and come here so i moved there....but few home once or twice a month to get my bills and pay them and to see my kids.I'm not sorry that i did that as i thought and still think we'd have never had a relationship not to mention marriage if we weren't together.And when we were apart we both missed each other so much we thought we'd die.It turned out i loved Ca. and it was one of the happiest 18months of my life.But you can only do so much.I know how hard it is for both of you.I hope it gets easier.

                Lynn

                Comment

                • #9
                  I really do understand what your talking about.Phill and i went thru that when he lived on the west coast and me on the east.After a few months i knew i had to move out there cause it was just no normal relationship living apart.Like you said...the time it takes to get used to each other.I knew he couldn't give up his practice and come here so i moved there....but few home once or twice a month to get my bills and pay them and to see my kids.I'm not sorry that i did that as i thought and still think we'd have never had a relationship not to mention marriage if we weren't together.And when we were apart we both missed each other so much we thought we'd die.It turned out i loved Ca. and it was one of the happiest 18months of my life.But you can only do so much.I know how hard it is for both of you.I hope it gets easier.

                  Lynn

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Claudia- believe me I feel your pain. Rick was gone for 9/14 months we dated. When he finally got home(DC), I had to start my new job in TX. We literally hand't spent more than one month together (ever- see what meeting online can do?)when we got married last May. So, here's my advice.

                    1)Stick with your visits. I completely agree that they are almost more trouble than they are worth, but they do help a little.

                    2)Don't let the wedding become a huge living breathing thing with a life of it's own. Have fun with what's left to do and enjoy it.

                    3)ENJOY YOUR TIME ALONE. Because as you have read, life with a tired doctor is not necessarily more fun than life without. Think of this as resting up for the rest of your life. and email me anytime for long distance support. I was lucky in that I was a part of an email loop of women who were all in long distance military relationships. It was helpful to have people who knew exactly what I was going through.

                    Jenn

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Claudia- believe me I feel your pain. Rick was gone for 9/14 months we dated. When he finally got home(DC), I had to start my new job in TX. We literally hand't spent more than one month together (ever- see what meeting online can do?)when we got married last May. So, here's my advice.

                      1)Stick with your visits. I completely agree that they are almost more trouble than they are worth, but they do help a little.

                      2)Don't let the wedding become a huge living breathing thing with a life of it's own. Have fun with what's left to do and enjoy it.

                      3)ENJOY YOUR TIME ALONE. Because as you have read, life with a tired doctor is not necessarily more fun than life without. Think of this as resting up for the rest of your life. and email me anytime for long distance support. I was lucky in that I was a part of an email loop of women who were all in long distance military relationships. It was helpful to have people who knew exactly what I was going through.

                      Jenn

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Claudia- believe me I feel your pain. Rick was gone for 9/14 months we dated. When he finally got home(DC), I had to start my new job in TX. We literally hand't spent more than one month together (ever- see what meeting online can do?)when we got married last May. So, here's my advice.

                        1)Stick with your visits. I completely agree that they are almost more trouble than they are worth, but they do help a little.

                        2)Don't let the wedding become a huge living breathing thing with a life of it's own. Have fun with what's left to do and enjoy it.

                        3)ENJOY YOUR TIME ALONE. Because as you have read, life with a tired doctor is not necessarily more fun than life without. Think of this as resting up for the rest of your life. and email me anytime for long distance support. I was lucky in that I was a part of an email loop of women who were all in long distance military relationships. It was helpful to have people who knew exactly what I was going through.

                        Jenn

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          It will all be ok, claudia...really!!! I can't think of a more stressful time than planning a wedding...and then here you guys are having to be so far apart right now. Then there is school..and we could both write a book about the stress of school right now!

                          No permanent damage....just great stories to tell your children/grandchildren and friends....



                          On a positive note...What are your honeymoon plans?





                          Kris

                          Comment

                          • #14
                            It will all be ok, claudia...really!!! I can't think of a more stressful time than planning a wedding...and then here you guys are having to be so far apart right now. Then there is school..and we could both write a book about the stress of school right now!

                            No permanent damage....just great stories to tell your children/grandchildren and friends....



                            On a positive note...What are your honeymoon plans?





                            Kris

                            Comment

                            • #15
                              It will all be ok, claudia...really!!! I can't think of a more stressful time than planning a wedding...and then here you guys are having to be so far apart right now. Then there is school..and we could both write a book about the stress of school right now!

                              No permanent damage....just great stories to tell your children/grandchildren and friends....



                              On a positive note...What are your honeymoon plans?





                              Kris

                              Comment

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