Here we go again...

[DCJenn]

Today the "Phone Tree" finally called to tell me that my "soldier, _______(insert name here)" had arrived in Kuwait.

How timely.

Hope they're a little more on the stick if something important actually happened.

Oh well. I guess we out-of-town spouses are at the bottom of the tree.

Jenn

[DCJenn]

Can we have a moment of thanks for naptime?

I'm so thankful that the dude is a sleeper. (We didn't get up until 10am this morning! I'm sorry, I know some of you have kiddos who wake up at the ass crack of dawn. Maybe he knows in some self-preservation sort of way that 5am is not a good time for mom)

Rick called yesterday from Kuwait. I have a feeling that they're on the move today but of course he couldn't tell me.

I've been able to manage mosts things but apparently now every appliance that is remotely related to water is not working properly. Luckily when I signed up for the annual plan with the HVAC people, it also includes plumbing inspection. I'm calling them tomorrow to have them look at the leaking refrigerator, the dryer that doesn't turn off, the hot water heater that's clicking...and whatever else decides to not work between now and the time they show up.

I'm so glad that the person who loves this house is in the desert.

I also have to get the pool people set up- I could do it. I'm perfectly capable. I don't want to do it. I'll call them tomorrow, too.

I'm getting excited for Fiesta. It's such a fun time in the city. The activities will be different since now I have a three-year old but it will be good to see some of the other events. It's basically ten days of events that go from 9am-midnight. The banks even shut down for the Battle of the Flowers Parade. (dude is too young- it's like a 4 hour parade and it's beastly hot most of the time)

I bought a bunch of cards to send to Rick. It really sucks with him not here but I try not to focus on it too much or for too long. I think the day-by-day thing is going to work for us. We ended up not making a video of him- we were going to have him reading some books to Nikolai. I'm not sure I could have handled that. I have a hard time talking to him. It would almost be easier to not talk to him. Then it wouldn't be in my face that he's really not here and really isn't going to be here for a very long time.

We'll get the videos set up though so that we can talk via skype or once he gets settled. That will help. I hope!

Oh well, dude is still asleep so I must take advantage of this and do something productive like wash the cars.

[DCJenn]

I got my morning phone call from Kuwait. They're still in a holding pattern. (I'm certainly OK with that) It's kind of cool how they do it- he calls the operators at Fort Sam Houston who then patch the call through to me. For free! He only gets 15-20 minutes but I'll take it.

He said he's been working out a lot and they're having some lectures that they attend, etc. (Things like traumatic brain injury, etc.) Its actually quite surreal to be having a conversation about things like the plumbing and know where he is and what he's likely to do soon. Bizarre.

Nikolai has been very tearful when I've left him at daycare this week. I'm sure it's that he's spoken to Rick both days BEFORE school. I think once we get a pattern it'll be OK but for now, it's tough. The teachers are supportive though (now that I gave them the OK to talk about it). I'm hoping that the new school will be a better place to keep his mind busy this fall. (man, that's hard to think about- even if Rick DOES get back in six months, we're still looking at October!) It's the crunchy granola school- sort of Montessori but more crunchy than that.

The plumbers are coming tomorrow and then dude and I are supposed to be meeting up with Sally and her men for lunch some where. That will be exceptionally cool!

I definitely think the gym before work is working out well. Tomorrow is my weigh in day and I'll be curious to see what's happened. I was surprised to lose 3 pounds the first week. It feels so good to sweat! It's also that I know my husband- and I know what he looks like when he has nothing to do but work and work-out. (like during med school when we met) he is one of those people who thinks nothing of jumping on a treadmill and running five miles at insane speeds. I guess since he's been in the military longer than he's had any other job he's just accustomed to being and staying fit. When we met I was also running 5 miles a day and lifting weights e/o day. My travelling job killed that. Guess we're both going to get back to the pre-marriage fitness levels! Gotta relieve the stress and worry somehow!

So- we plug away- another day Xed of the calendar.

[DCJenn]

I haven't slept in days. Nikolai has been waking up several times every night yelling for me. I know he's just testing to see if I'm here but man, this is no fun. I'm so glad I missed the newborn stage. I have no idea how people do it.

The weather is supposed to be pretty bad this weekend, too. UGH. No easter egg hunts outside. No long walks with the dog. No escape. I guess we'll hit the library on Saturday and go out for brunch on Sunday.

At least I made happy hour tonight. The best part about having a nice group of people to hang out iwth is that on Thursdays, it's happy hour. Either outside at our favorite local watering hole or inside at someone's house. It has to be poouring down rain for it to not be outside though since the watering hole has a fireplace and misters so you're always warmed or cooled depending on the weather.

It was nice to catch up with the gang.

But now, I'm going to bed. I really wanted to try to finish this blanket I'm knitting but there's no way- I'm way too spent. The trainer at the gym kicked my arse today too.

[DCJenn]

Today is been a great day, as we had our first video conference with our man in Baghdad! It was so awesome to see him. I figured something was up when we didn't hear from him for a few days. He called yesterday to let us know that he had arrived safely.

We did the video connection through iChat which was really easy. I also signe dup for Skype in case he couldn't get through via his laptop. Nikolai was so excited. He kept saying, "hi daddy, hi daddy, hi daddy!" and waving. We weren't really able to have much of an adult conversation but that's ok. The video was more for Nikolai anyway.

We also had a fantastic brunch at the locally famous Madhatter's with our friend Jeannette. I had the smoked salmon benedict, Nikolai had their french toast (made with English Muffins) and she had what they call a scram with eggs, spinach, ham and some feta. I also had a fantastic pot of Vanilla Almond Tea. Then the three of us shared a huge piece of chocolate cake. Yummy!

The Easter Bunny came and brought some books and a few pieces of candy. I decided that he didn't need a ton of candy since he also got a basket from day care.

All in all it's been a great day, despite the fact that it was in the 40s and rainy. We're going to get out of the house and take a walk on the Riverwalk with the dog. I have cabin fever. I don't know how the Minnesotans deal with nasty weather all the time.

[DCJenn]

I have got to get a grip or this is going to be a VERY long deployment.

We were able to have a quick video chat this morning. I told him that I was going to go get Nikolai so that he could say hi and by the time I got back- bam- he was offline again.

So of course my FIRST thought is that he's been blown to pieces . Not- oh I bet the internet connection went down. I spent the entire day at work surfing the net- and of course found the Christian Science Monitor article about how there have been more attacks on the Green Zone recently. My friend warned me about the double-edged sword of 'easy' communications. In some ways it IS better to hear from them via the occasional letter.

I'm hoping he'll check in when he gets up to go to work which should be about 10 or 11 pm my time. I'm crossing my fingers that his internet access is back.

Of course, it's still so surreal. I started a countdown on my calendar at work, which doesn't have enough months to encompass the entire deployment if he ends up having to stay a year. I feel really sorry for the spouses of the reservists- they're getting called up for the third time! It's one thing to be regular military (physician or not)- you're in, you go. Period. and I suppose the same is for the reserve and guard units but imagine just getting your life put back together and bam- you have to go again.

Yikes. This sucks. I want them fully funded and I want an end date. I want him in body armor, weapon loaded and not EVER in a convoy. (although he reports that he's being tasked to consult other hospitals- not really sure what that means. I hope it means a video conference...)

357 more days. Not that I'm counting or anything.

[DCJenn]

The infamous phone tree caught up to us again. Yay.

Rick is back online most of the time and is actually doing adult neurology with injured soldiers- what a great idea! Let's have the neurologist DO neurology. I have to send him his adult neurology books ASAP and they weigh a frickin' ton. But he wants them since his internet access is spotty.

and hangers. Apparently, hangers weren't on anyone's 'to buy' list. I told him that I'd send some and he can sell the rest!

and we had good news- according to the personnel person, he really is a 180 rotator rather than 360 days. except I don't know what will happen with the new troop extensions of three months. It would follow that the support services would need to extend. I allowed myself 24 hours to be excited about the possibility but now- I'm back to "I'll believe it when I see him walk through the door".

I put Nikolai in a sweatshirt that Rick had sent from Ireland before school today because it was kind of chilly- and he didn't take it off ALL day. Refused- and he had a t-shirt on underneath. he wouldn't let them take off the t-shirt, either. He kept it on the whole time he was home, too. Guess he likes his daddy's taste in sweatshirts! (It's really cute- it's navy blue with a lamb on it. Totally touristy but cute)

Tomorrow I have to write the ugly tax check to DC. Glad that's over- since my beloved husband never did change his residency from TX...

and...Monday the HVAC guys come. I'm meeting them on Friday to go over everything and give them a key. It's going to take four days. I've hired the babysitter for Saturday so that I can really clean after all of the construction dust has settled. My upstairs is nothing but heat and humidity. My ceiling is dripping, seriously dripping. I'm pretending that there is no mold with heat and humidity. Although until it gets fixed, all I can do is run a fan up there anyway. Hopefully it hasn't ruined the few things in storage- I don't have the nerve strength to go look right now.

and I can't get a pool person. Good lord, I'm quitting my job and I'm going to open my own pool store. People don't return calls, they don't show up, they cancel. It's horrible. Tomorrow I'm pulling up Angies List and calling everyone until I find someone.

I need a secretary.

[DCJenn]

I'm calling this 10 Reasons Why it's Not the Worst Thing that my Husband is Deployed:

10) The TV hasn't been on in weeks.

9) I can sleep in the middle of the bed w/ all 3 cats and the dog and still have room.

8) um, well, we got the first paycheck and OMFG!!!!!

7) I can wear lipstick and not hear about that "sh*t" on my lips.

6) A bottle of wine lasts 4 days, not 1 meal.

5) When he's pissy and calls from Iraq I can ignore it because let's face it, I don't have to deal with his cranky pants self for more than 15 minutes a day.

4) I can cook for 1.5 and it can be liver and onions. (a personal favorite that is not to be cooked or consumed w/ my husband present- he claims it makes him gag...)

3) I can hire people to do things that I am perfectly capable of doing and feel not a whit of guilt.

2) I mentioned the paycheck, right?

1) I get to remember why being single is good AND still be married. (and once he's home, I'll get to remember why being married is better!)

[DCJenn]

OK- we do online Real Well. It's right back to how we interacted when we dated. (except better)

I just watched my husband the dawkter get dressed in his Army uniform, his bullet proof vest, his helmet and his sidearm.

Yes, they wear guns to go to work. and at work. so I guess the definition of 'healing professional' is different 'at war'. He can fix them or kill them.

Great.

But he looked good and it was a good conversation.

and the Army times reports divorce levels are no higher than before the war. I guess we Army brides really do get it.

J.

[DCJenn]

Not much new to report, other than as expected, we've had the occasional angry outburst from Nikolai both at school and at home. He spit at someone at school and hit someone else. At home he had one incident of closed fist punching me. So, we went back to "International Adoption 101" and reinstituted Holding. It's used a lot as a technique to foster attachments, particularly in older post-institutionalized children.

Basically, you take your purple, irate, upset child, bring them on to your lap (if they fit), wrap your arms around their entire body (so that they can't flail their arms) and just hold them- pretty tightly. While you're holding them you can rock and whisper reassuring words. In the beginning they resist a LOT. (we're past that stage but the older they are when they are adopted, the less likely it is that they've had any kind of significant human touch)

It can be exhausting but you hold them until you feel them physically release from the tantrum. Usually what happens is that he'll end up all snuggly and we'll stay like that for a while.

As long as it helps him get through this, I'll hold him for hours. Heck, that's another reason to get to the gym- it's a lot harder to hold 30+ pounds than 15 pounds!

Jenn

[DCJenn]

Here's the email from today:

not much happening here, as you can imagine, at least not stuff that i can tell you or that you would be interested in anyway. had my neurology day today and they double booked me for one slot, because they didn't tell me that they had any patients and i told one to come in today. owell. some train wrecks, but we'll see. better than sitting around handing out motrin and pseudaphed.

(That's actually an upbeat email!)

Fun times in Baghdad.

ETA: I was just able to have an audio chat and he sounds better after a good night's sleep and going to the gym. They had "surf and turf" last night for dinner. He said it wasn't bad.

[DCJenn]

I'm exhausted after a week of entertaining the relatives.

It was fun but not at all relaxing. My parents came in on Tuesday and my brother, SIL and nephew came in on Thursday. We went to the Beethoven Mannechor for some German food and music on Thursday. (Thursday am my parents and I took Nikolai to Lackland AFB for their Fiesta parade- it was hot but worth it if only to see the team of military dogs and their handlers.)

Friday we pretty much just hung out here- swam in the pool, etc. Saturday was the King William Fair- home of drag queens, men dressed as flamingoes and Pomeranians in Mexican dresses. (it's a bit eclectic)

Random celebrity sighting- David Caruso at my friend Julie's house on Saturday. (he's short)

Sunday we went out for brunch and then hung out some more. Grilled some steaks and had some salad and crusty sourdough for dinner.

Poor Rick was online instant messaging as often as he could. He describes his life as like Groundhog Day. I've been able to audio with him a few times and my parents were able to talk to him via video. He's definitely not Mr. Cheerful but is doing more and more neurological consulting which is helping. He's running 8-10 miles a day, too.

I did get to the gym Tuesday and Thursday which is better than nothing at all. Time to get back to the routine tomorrow. I'm actually looking forward to it because Nikolai is totally off kilter time-wise now. My nephew wakes up super early and doesn't nap so my dude is a walking zombie. (I was successful in getting him to nap a for a few days but not his normal long naps)

and apparently we have a new cat (see Pet Therapy). I didn't really want another cat (at least inside cat) but when one invites himself to his former home, I thought I should be hospitable.

Anyway, I'm done. I have done nothing but clean for people, during people and after people.

I need sleep!

[DCJenn]

Oh one more funny thing- when he's video conferencing with us, he has his weapon in a holster- in his PT uniform...so I finally asked what they did with their weapons while they're in the gym seeing as it might get in the way on a run.

Apparently there are racks for the M-16s and the sidearms in the gym.

I don't know why that cracks me up but it does.

Jenn

[DCJenn]

I'm 100% sure that there's never been a better tasting glass of wine than the one I'm having right now.

I'm so unbelievably tired, particularly after staying up until 1am making sure that the pool was still working.

I worked out and mainlined coffee which worked to keep me going until about a half an hour ago when I yawned my way through The Big Book of Real Trains. (The favorite of the moment- we read three every night, at least ONE of the three will be train book)

Rick called on Monday afternoon and basically said nothing- I mean he said he was fine and that he missed us but other than that he can't say much else. He did tell me to keep thinking that he's safe. (don't even want to think about what that means) and that they haven't had any morter attacks in a while. (yay?)

I'm staying up for 15 more minutes to see if I can catch him online before he goes to work. Then I'm done.

I was invited to the monthly "Hearts Away From Home" meeting at Ft. Sam but it just seems so girly. They do crafts, etc and the kids get hotdogs and movies. My kid has never seen a movie (didn't know who Spiderman was until my brother showed up...thanks John) and he hates hotdogs. (do you have any beets or blue cheese?) I'd much rather have our neighborhood friends come over and their kids can play in the pool and the grown-ups can grill real food. I know that they are nice people- rarely are military spouses not decent people- but I'm really not good in that kind of setting.

My parents are up in Elmira, NY (hi BonBon!) to deal with my grandmother- who was diagnosed with congenital heart failure, except that she told my mother it was genital heart failure. Funny! (except that it's not...) She's about 4 feet tall and four feet wide at this point and she's getting fuzzy and she literally moves maybe ten feet a day. Up from bed to the bathroom, to the kitchen, to her chair. She won't drink fluids because she doesn't want to have to go the bathroom. They're going to have to figure out where she's going to go because she can't stay in the place where she currently lives. Sad. My grandfather died almost 40 years ago and she's been bitter ever since.

The only really good thing is that I'm really starting to see some signficant muscle definition. I'm doing about an hour of cardio 6 days a week and weight training twice a week. This Saturday I have a 5 mile walk/run. We'll see how much actual running I do. It's to benefit the police widows and families so it's a good cause. (and it's downtown which means that I can walk over with dude in the jogging stroller)

Oh well, 147 more days.

J.

[DCJenn]

Well, we didn't do the walk this morning. Why? Because the Spurs won. and why would this matter? Because since it was the quarterfinals or finals or whatever- they set off 45 minutes of fireworks last night. I live across the street from the Alamodome and the Tower of America- my windows were shaking, the sound was reverberating off the houses across the street- it was intense.

and it woke up dog, dude and me. (and freaked out 2/3 cats- have no idea if the 4th was freaked out- he lives upstairs when the dog is in).

I remember waking up thinking that shots were being fired which immediately set off the adreneline. It took me forver to get everyone settled back down. (after I got up to see them- I do have front row seats afterall)

We had a video conference with our man in Baghdad today. Much better connection today- he's lost a ton of weight- I swear he looks like the pictures of his enlisted days- all cheekbones and jaw. He and Nikolai blew kisses to each other throughout the conversation. It was cute.

Tomorrow we've been invited to the Colonel's ranch/B&B with the other CN gang. It's a ways out of town but it'll be good to get out of dodge for a little while.

I've decided (especially after seeing my lanky husband) that I needed to up the effort on the calories- and plan to add 15 minutes of cardio MWF this week. That'll bring me to 60 minutes MWF of cardio and 45 minutes of weights T/Th. I'd like to do more on the weekends but unless it's walking the dog on the riverwalk w/ the jogging stroller - there's not a whole lot I can do. I have some yoga dvds but I need to do them during nap, not wait until it's nighttime. I have 5 more months (or 11) to get this accomplished- shouldn't be a problem.

No dead animals OR appliance repairs in three days. (ETA: oops- it's only been two days...) I'm on a roll.

J.